Chapter Thirty-Five
Goodbye, but not farewell …
Leticia stood beside Jim on the balcony of their suite and looked out at the view.
The Emerald Dream was heading into port, and soon they would arrive in Newcastle.
It was a clear sunny morning, and as the ship glided into the mouth of the River Tyne and passed the lighthouse on the end of the pier, Leticia smiled.
Beyond the sand dunes of the beach at Little Haven, she glimpsed the Beach Ladies, the bronze figures that greeted visitors arriving from the North Sea.
She remembered describing the munchkin-like ladies to Jim on the morning that they were due to depart on their Arctic cruise, and now, the ladies were welcoming them back.
People were gathered near the pier, many with raised hands as they watched the Emerald Dream, and Leticia smiled and returned the greetings.
What a wonderful cruise this had been!
She leaned into Jim as he slipped his arm around her and thought of the many memories etched in the days and nights, and to her delight, the unexpected gift of a new friendship. As Leticia continued to wave, she thought of Joy and the events of the previous evening.
When Lady Eleanor had gradually regained consciousness, and a medic arrived, Leticia heard her murmur her thanks to Joy, adding the words, ‘For staying’.
At those words, a flicker of fear crossed Joy’s face, so quick it might have been missed by anyone close by. But Leticia saw it, and, in an instant, she understood. When their eyes met, the truth passed between them.
The burden Joy was carrying wasn’t just grief. It was guilt. And now, Leticia knew why.
Leticia knew the signs, not only as a nurse, but as a woman who had seen too many bear the scars of cruelty behind closed doors. A year ago, when Joy’s husband had suffered a heart attack, Leticia now realised that Joy had done nothing.
As Eleanor was assisted by the medics, Leticia took Joy to one side and they sat quietly, as Leticia waited for Joy to speak.
‘When I saw Tom, I didn’t call for help straight away,’ Joy said, her voice barely above a whisper.
‘I could have, and I meant to, but when I went into the corridor, I was paralysed and couldn’t move.
There was a phone in our room, but I had to get out.
I don’t know how long I stood there before I forced myself to summon medical help.
By the time I got back, he’d stopped breathing.
’ Joy hung her head. ‘Tom was horrible to me, Leticia, he made my life a misery. You have no idea.’
Leticia took Joy’s hand. ‘I do have an idea,’ she said, choosing her words with care.
‘And I need to tell you something. Not just as a nurse but as your friend. A catastrophic cardiac arrest, the kind the doctors later told you Tom had, is almost always fatal. Even with help, it is unlikely that it would have made a difference.’
Joy looked into Leticia’s eyes. ‘I’ve always felt evil for not picking up the phone straight away.’
Leticia wiped a tear from Joy’s cheek. ‘Maybe he might have lived. Maybe not. But what I am certain of is that he made you feel powerless for so long, and when this happened, you froze. That’s not evil, Joy. It’s trauma. And you are not to blame.’
Leticia watched as Joy visibly relaxed, as though something in her heart had loosened. ‘Let it go, Joy,’ Leticia pleaded, ‘you don’t have to carry this as a sentence for the rest of your life. You’ve already paid the price.’
‘Almost there,’ Leticia said to Jim as she held his hand, and the ship passed the Customs House across the water on the North Shields side.
Further upriver, the scenery changed to the stark beauty of Tyneside’s industrial past. They could see towering cranes in the shipyards, standing side by side with old and modern buildings while fishing boats, overshadowed by the Emerald Dream, bobbed about nearby.
As the world narrowed from the wide-open sea, Leticia turned to her husband. ‘We’re home, darling,’ she said and kissed his cheek.
‘Here’s to our next adventure.’ Jim smiled, his eyes fixed on the port drawing closer.
Leticia’s stomach churned, and her grip on his hand tightened. The doctors had been kind but clear. When The Beast returned, there wouldn’t be any more adventures.
But as seagulls swooped and cawed overhead, she remembered the aurora borealis and whispered a prayer that her miracle wish be granted and buy them a little more time. ‘Wherever that adventure takes us, I’ll always be with you,’ she said, blinking back the sting in her eyes.
Jim, still watching the approaching port, placed his arm around her shoulders and squeezed. ‘My darling Leticia,’ he smiled, ‘and that is all I need.’
In the port terminal, Kenneth searched for a trolley.
Laden down with two suit carriers, Barbara’s voluminous fur coat and her vanity bag, which weighed as much as a Victorian dressing table, he snatched the last trolley just ahead of a woman in a wheelchair.
As the woman cursed, Kenneth, hot and flustered hurried away to catch up with Barbara.
‘Why are you dawdling?’ Barbara was unimpressed as they waited for the shuttle to transport them to their Range Rover, where the rest of their luggage was already waiting.
‘Because I’m carrying half your wardrobe, a mink the size of a sofa, and enough cosmetics to sink the entire ship,’ Kenneth puffed. ‘Honestly, Babs, you’re the limit.’
‘You know I don’t trust anyone with my valuable things,’ Barbara sniffed as Kenneth gave the trolley a shove, narrowly missing his wife’s ankles.
Seated and settled in the front of the Range Rover a little while later, as Kenneth loaded the luggage Barbara stifled a yawn.
She wasn’t looking forward to going home to Cheshire, where most of her cronies would be wintering in Spain, and with winter weather closing the golf course, there would be no audience to admire her photographs with the captain or listen to her brag about the cruise.
The time ahead would drag, stuck in the house with Kenneth.
Barbara needed a new distraction, something to fill the upcoming days.
‘All set, old girl, wagons roll!’ Kenneth announced as he finally climbed into the vehicle.
Barbara blanched and, for the hundredth time, wished he’d pick something less ageing when addressing her.
Glancing sideways, she sighed. He was wearing his trapper hat, at her insistence, and his face was puffed up and red, but she couldn’t possibly have him arriving home with a troll wig on his head.
God knows what the neighbours would say about that.
As they pulled away from the terminal, Kenneth paused at a junction to allow a Bentley to glide past. In the back sat Lady Eleanor, regal as ever, with Margaret seated beside her.
‘Good lord, she’s made a rapid recovery,’ Kenneth said, giving a cheerful toot of the horn and a hearty wave.
‘Must you?’ Barbara snapped. She was still smarting from being left off the guest list for Lady Eleanor’s New Year’s Eve party in Ireland and had no intention of offering so much as a nod.
‘It was probably just a fainting fit, her way of vying for attention,’ Barbara sniped. ‘You know how dramatic gentry can be.’
‘I heard the old gal has a dodgy ticker,’ Kenneth replied and hit the accelerator.
‘Who knows and who cares,’ Barbara said and gripped the side of her seat as they hurtled into a stream of heavy traffic.
Heavy rain began to fall as the countryside whizzed by and Barbara remembered the raffle prize they’d won. As described, it was very grand and included a generous discount voucher for their next cruise.
‘Have you any plans in the next few weeks?’ Barbara asked Kenneth, her tone light.
‘None that wouldn’t include you, my sweetheart.’
‘I rather fancy another holiday,’ she said, planting the idea, ‘and the Caribbean would be delightful at this time of year.’
‘Couldn’t we use that voucher towards another cruise?’ Kenneth suggested.
Barbara smiled. He’d taken the bait. ‘Exactly what I was thinking,’ she said, adjusting her chair, to lie back. In moments, Barbara was dreaming of cocktails, calypso, and a sultry Caribbean cruise.
And who knew? Maybe there would be a more compliant captain, or even a first officer or two …
In the Mermaid Theatre, Henry sat with his luggage beside him, waiting to disembark.
Passengers in the lower decks were called by the colour of their luggage tags, and he hoped that his turn would come soon.
Joy had already gone ahead, and the thought of seeing her in the terminal filled him with pleasure.
He was taking her back to her home.
Together they would drive to Lancaster in his Morris Traveller, and to Henry’s delight, Joy had invited him to stay with her.
If all went well, as he felt sure it would, he planned to return the invitation in Skipton.
Henry was especially looking forward to introducing Joy to Audrey and was confident that the two women would get on well.
He was also looking forward to meeting Susan, Joy’s daughter and her husband, Hugh.
Joy had mentioned that she intended to visit soon, partly to catch up but also to talk with Susan and formally introduce Henry.
‘Passengers with the colour purple luggage tags may now disembark.’ Simon’s cheery voice rang out, and Henry gathered his hand luggage.
As he left the ship and walked across the quay to the terminal, he heard a voice calling his name. Puzzled, he turned.
‘Mr Henry! Mr Henry!’
Henry looked up and to his delight, he saw Jennifer on a lower deck, wildly waving her duster.
She was beaming, her whole face alight with elation.
He remembered leaving his cabin earlier, when the housekeeper had flung her body against his to hug him so tightly, he’d had difficulty in prising her off and saying goodbye.
‘Thank you, Mr Henry! Thank you for everything!’ Jennifer’s voice, full of feeling, caught the wind.
Henry laughed and lifted a hand in return. ‘Look after yourself, dear Jennifer, write to me soon and don’t forget, I want to see lots of photos!’
Jennifer nodded eagerly, dabbing at her eyes with the corner of her apron. ‘God bless you, Mr Henry,’ she bellowed. ‘My children have a future now. You have given them that.’
Their eyes met for a moment longer. Hers shining with gratitude. His aglow with pleasure.
As Henry turned towards the terminal, he thought of the Gift Deed arrangement he’d soon set up for Jennifer, after consulting with his lawyer.
At Henry’s request for advice, Jim had suggested this and carefully explained how it worked.
Years ago, Henry’s father had left him a property, which he had sold for a considerable sum.
He didn’t need the money, and now, at last, he’d found a purpose for it that felt right.
Giving Jennifer the means to educate her children in the Philippines brought him happiness.
It wasn’t charity, it was gratitude for the woman’s kindness and …
Because he could. It felt like a natural course to use something he didn’t need to change someone else’s life.
The terminal doors opened, and Henry hurried in. Joy was waiting for him and as he moved towards her, for the first time in what seemed like forever, Henry felt that his life had meaning and most of all, love.
In the terminal building, Joy sat with her suitcases by her side.
As she watched passengers search for their luggage, she remembered a little earlier, standing on the Lido Deck of the Emerald Dream as the ship glided gracefully through the calm waters to enter the mouth of the River Tyne.
Beneath the early morning sky, seagulls wheeled and cried overhead, their calls echoing over the waves and welcoming home the passengers of the Arctic cruise.
As the gleam of the hull cut through the misty morning, they’d passed a sandy bay at Little Haven, and Joy saw the Inn on the Beach hotel.
She remembered the cosy room that she hadn’t wanted to leave, the quiet refuge where she stayed the night before she boarded the cruise.
It felt like a lifetime ago, and the woman who’d set sail for the Arctic was a shadow of the one now returning.
Like a soothing balm, her days at sea had ultimately taken away her pain.
The ache that she’d carried onto the ship, the weight of unhappiness, had softened and dispersed like sea spray in the wind that blew over the waves.
Leticia, dear Leticia, had taken away her guilt, releasing her back into the world. And what a world awaited.
Standing at the rail, with salt air caressing her skin and South Shields coming into view, Joy had known that whatever lay ahead, she was no longer afraid to meet it. She’d felt a lightness, confidence, and most of all, love.
Henry Halliday. A man with a heart as big as the sea they’d sailed had come into her life, and she knew he was here to stay.
He’d seen her for who she was and asked for nothing but the chance to walk beside her.
Joy had almost laughed as the wind tugged at her hair, and reaching for the ring on her wedding finger, she tossed it into the sea.
No longer haunted by her past, she thought of the days to come, knowing that she would step into her future with joy, both in name and in spirit.
And she had the Arctic cruise to thank for that.
Now, as she looked up, she saw Henry walking through the terminal towards her, a broad smile lighting up his face.
For somewhere in the stillness of the northern nights, a spell had been cast, and in the magical glow of the aurora borealis, Joy had found what she hadn’t even known she was looking for.
A hand to hold, and a man whom she would love, her heart finally, at peace.
‘Henry,’ she said softly, as pulled her into his arms. ‘Take me home.’