Chapter 5
FIVE
“Hell's bells, Jack. This is a shit plan and you know it.”
Dixon was sprawled out across their apartment's couch with a dead-on impression of his father across his face. Heavy judgment, slight detachment, ever-present hunger. Despite his disapproval, he snaked a hand out and grabbed the last of the tortilla chips on the coffee table.
“It's not that big of a deal,” he said after he came up for air. “We'll have lunch, smile, take a few pictures, and then get out of there when we're done. After that? Just rinse and repeat until Benny goes back home. Easy peasy.”
Dixon shook his head and pointed a chip at him.
“I'm not talking about this fake relationship BS.
I'm talking about going to this fancy schmancy lunch thing when you know damn well that Felicity is going to be there.” He jabbed the chip in Jack's direction.
“You might be fake dating Benny, but Felicity is real engaged to Marcus.
You eating little sandwiches and snails and drinking champagne with them isn't going to change those facts.”
Jack had known he was going to get flak from his cousin about the arrangement he'd made with Benny, but him being grumpy over Felicity's presence hadn't crossed his mind. Then again, Dixon had never been a big fan when it came to the absolute stunner of a woman.
“I liked Calvin better,” he’d muttered after Jack had become official with Felicity. When she left him three years later, Dixon hadn’t tried to cover his feelings then either.
“Calvin at least had the decency to pretend to like the bar,” he’d muttered, once again.
Unwilling to face his cousin’s current concerns, Jack was sidestepping the most.
“Escargot,” he corrected.
Dixon narrowed his eyes.
“What did you call me?”
Jack rolled his.
“You know that's what the snail dish is called. Escargot. And I don't think that's what they're going to serve at lunch and I don’t think it’s a big deal, snails or no snails.”
Dixon diverted his attention back to his food.
“Whatever, you say Boss. Point is, the situation ain't changing. This arrangement doesn’t give you anything other than a weirdly specific reason to turn into the mopey, heartbroken Jack we all love but secretly hate.” He crunched another chip but spoke around it, “I don't know about you, but I don't know if I can handle him again.”
Jack let out a long sigh.
“I wasn't that bad,” he said.
Dixon snorted.
They both knew that was a lie.
Calvin had been casual. Felicity had…not.
That wound had gone straight to the chest and stayed around for some time.
He hadn’t just gone from a boyfriend to single.
He’d been affected.
Every part of him, it had felt like.
Unable to escape the fact that he’d been blind-sided by their break-up.
So, at first maybe he’d spent a little too much time trying to figure out what he’d done wrong.
Why the happiness he was sure she had been enjoying with him had suddenly been only a solo affair.
They’d laughed and had good sex and brought each other presents, remembered anniversaries, made efforts with their friends.
Sure, they disagreed on a few things—neither one was a fan of the other's profession, why would someone want to sell their soul to the corporate world and spend most of their time traveling for greedy overlords who never left their cushy home?
—but that had never bothered Jack enough to make a big fuss over it.
But then he’d realized, after the fog of confusion had lifted, that maybe his job had been a bigger deal to her than the other way around.
Her floating the idea of leaving his post at the local, small-time bar for something bigger and better might have been more than just a few idle thoughts between the sheets.
Not that any of that had mattered—Jack had been vocally opposed no matter the way the idea was brought up.
He wasn’t leaving Cassidy’s Place unless Cassidy’s Place left first.
Growth, money, power?
He didn’t want that.
But he had become a grouch when he realized, even if he had wanted those things, getting any of the three wasn’t like going to the grocery store and buying a package deal.
“Even Santana started avoiding you at work,” Dixon continued after a moment. “And that woman loves being in our business, so you know when she goes quiet, something’s wrong.”
Dixon finally put his bag of chips down, narrowing his eyes again.
“And, by the way, this whole shenanigan thing you're doing with ol’ Benny Boy is going to blow her mind. Faking a relationship is already going to throw her, but add in its some poor guy who’s on all of her socials right now?
She's going to eat it up.” He paused. “Wait, you're going to tell her, right?”
Jack didn’t like the feeling, but he wavered.
Telling Dixon about the faking dating—but not the real identity of Guy because he wasn’t a monster—had been a no brainer. Dixon Knox wasn’t just his cousin, he was Jack’s person. Not that he’d let his cousin get that ego boost by admitting it out loud.
Dixon had simply been his best friend since Jack knew what that meant.
Then there was the more pragmatic issue—the fact that they worked together, lived together, and hung out together. Jack could lie to him, sure, but it just made tactical sense not to try. At least not about the shenanigans part of the plan.
Plus, Dixon had a way of blurting his thoughts out loud unless prepared first.
As for Santana? It also probably wouldn't hurt to tell his only other close friend— they’d become a trio when she started working at the bar.
But.
Santana would also be the first person to admit she loved the tea.
Gossip this big would be too tempting, and wasn’t he a better friend to help her avoid such a dangerous temptation?
“I shouldn't have even told you,” Jack admitted, side-stepping a real answer. “Last time I shared a secret with you, I got grounded for a month.”
A tortilla chip flew through the air. It skidded across the breakfast bar between them.
“Hey! I don't know how many times I gotta tell you this, but Mom knew someone took the car out, and it was either you or me, cousin-brother, and I chose me. But that was an isolated incident. I’ve been faithful every day since!”
Jack picked up the chip and threw it back.
“And for the hundredth time, you could have blamed it on Lucy, but no. I got the shaft.”
Dixon laughed but only because he knew that they both knew that hadn’t been an option.
“No way in hell was I going to go after Lucy. She might be my little sister, but that was before we had growth spurts. That girl had stilts for legs even then. She would have squashed us.”
There was no point pretending not to find that funny.
Lucy lived and worked with her Marine boyfriend in Washington. Dixon, on paper, might have seemed like the more intimidating one, but that never was the case when Lucy was in the room with someone.
She wasn’t just tall, she was fire barely contained.
A good drinker, a better cusser, and the loudest supporter of whatever dumb, good, or bad plan her brother and cousin had cooked up. Just like Santana, minus the height.
Jack relented.
“Fine. I'll tell Santana,” he said. “But no one else. Not even your dad. The less people who know we're faking it, the better.”
Dixon seemed to think it over. He nodded.
“All right,” he said. “But, just remember, if you're going to pull this off, you need to focus on Benny and not your ex during this HGTV episode of a lunch. That means pay attention to him. You know, arm around his shoulder. Hand-holding. Chair pulling out, or letting him pull the chair out for you? I don’t know. Tell jokes, laugh at his. Compliment his outfit. That kind of thing.”
Jack snorted.
“Wait a minute. Are you telling me how to flirt?”
Dixon held up his hands in defense.
“I'm telling you that you're voluntarily walking into a very awkward situation, so you better make it count. Does Benny even know about you and Felicity, by the way?”
Jack paused again. This time he tried to shrug it off.
“The dating pool is only so deep around here. Everyone in Arbor Bay knows about us.”
“That's not what I asked,” Dixon pointed out.
If Jack was being honest with himself, he didn’t think Benny had any idea his Guy’s new girl was Jack’s ex. That conversation, if so, would definitely make him all cherry red. Jack might not have known Benny that well, but he had noticed how easily flustered he could become.
It was cute.
Dixon tilted his head to the side and laughed into the silence that had grown.
“Oh boy if this isn’t all going to go so south.”
* * *
There was another car in the driveway when Jack pulled up to Benny's home half an hour later. Benny, however, was nowhere to be seen.
Jack took a moment to contemplate laying on the horn but decided it probably wouldn’t be very Guy-like of him. But that didn’t mean he was ready to sweep Benny off of his feet in front of whoever was inside the house now.
He would have rather eaten the plastic chip bag than admit it to Dixon, but Jack was starting to feel a bit of nerves seep in at the thought of going to the Robertson Estate.
He didn’t mind the idea of eating snails, but he hadn’t seen Felicity in over a year.
Her marketing job had her bouncing from state to state when they were dating and fighting for time together had been hard then.
After they split, it had been easy to stay in their respective separate lanes.
But that didn’t mean Jack hadn’t thought of the eventuality of running into hers again one random day in town.
He’d also never admit it to Dixon, but Jack had spent a little too much time role-playing in the shower what he’d say to Felicity when he ran into her again.
How's it going?
Oh, me?
You know, just doing the same ol' same ol'.
Still at the bar wasting my potential like you said that one time after we had sex on that weird rug your grandmother left you.
Money?
Oh yeah, still don’t have that either.
Not even Shower Jack could make that conversation feel good.