Chapter 23
THEA
We fucked up.
I can hardly see through the sheets of rain pounding the windshield. Thunder booms so loudly that it shakes my poor little car. My tires fight to hold on to the road as it weaves around the mountains.
“Thea, we have to pull over,” Owen says, clutching the “oh shit” handle on the ceiling like Hell’s trying to suck us through a portal and his grip’s the only thing preventing our demise.
“We can’t,” I say. “I promised her I’d be there.”
About twenty minutes ago, the beautiful, clear blue sky was suddenly taken over by dark, ominous clouds, and ten minutes ago—thirty minutes from us reaching the inn—the skies opened up.
If I had stuck to my original plan, I’d have made it back before the storm. Instead, Owen and I grabbed lunch at this adorable place a few blocks out of downtown that was covered from floor to ceiling with kitschy paintings of Scottish terriers and then wandered around downtown Elk Ridge.
I told myself that this thing with him isn’t selfish.
We’re just exploring what we could be without making it a whole dramatic thing, right?
But my decision today was selfish. I had a simple task—grab the rings and get back in time to back Addy up at the spa—and instead I spent the day laughing and flirting.
Owen lets out another hiss as we take a curve too close to the edge for comfort. “Addy would rather have you at the wedding than you die trying to get back for a goddamn spa trip.”
Logically I know this is true, but she’s been so stressed over her relationship with this family.
I don’t think my friendship with Camila or Diana’s obsession with me and Owen has helped.
And even if I didn’t feel guilty over my role in all this, she asked me to be there.
That’s enough. I screwed this up by choosing my wants over Addy’s needs.
And it’s not like we’re actually going to die.
I plan to just keep driving and ignore Owen’s concerns, until my tires hit a slick spot that sends our car coasting. Everything in me goes hot and tight all at once, and my eyes shoot to Owen to see the same look of panic on his face.
All the training from years of driving in Florida thunderstorms kicks in even as my heart thunders as wildly as the weather outside. I take my foot off the pedal, gently steering us until we get enough traction to pull off onto one of the runaway ramps, and I bring the car to a stop.
As soon as the parking brake’s on, Owen’s hands are on me, unclipping my seat belt and running up my arms and over my shoulders as he pulls me into his lap. “It’s okay. We’re okay.”
I bury my head in his neck, muttering “fuck” on repeat as my heart rate comes down. His warmth isn’t enough to stop the way my body shakes.
“We have to get off the road,” he says, placing a kiss on my temple.
My eyes flood with tears. “We’re only twenty minutes away. We can make it.”
His hands come to my cheeks. “These roads are dangerous in the best of conditions. But right now, all it takes is one more puddle for us to go off the side of the mountain.”
I’m not ready to give up. “Let’s just call the inn. I’m sure there’s someone with a big truck that can handle the roads like this.”
“Doubt we have service,” Owen says, but pulls his phone out to check, confirming what he knew he’d see.
“Let’s just wait here for it to clear up.”
“And wait for another car to hit that same spot and slam into us?” he asks.
I glance out his window at the steep slope before he sets me back in the driver’s seat.
“These storms can go for hours, and I’m not letting you kill yourself because you feel guilty.
Now put the car in drive and follow my directions somewhere safe. ”
I blink away the tears, but do what he says, driving slowly and carefully to a dirt road. Another couple hundred yards of mud later, he has me pull off by a wooden fence.
“Where are we?” I ask.
Owen leans forward, looking out the windshield at the torrent. “The far side of my Uncle Dennis’s property. There’s a barn about a hundred feet through that gate. Let’s spend the storm there instead of stuck in this tiny car. Yeah?”
His question is soft, like if he presses too hard I’ll break into a thousand shards, but when I give him a stiff nod, he throws his door open, bolting through the pouring rain.
I head out right behind him, and within seconds, I’m drenched.
It takes less than a minute to reach the barn, but I feel each step, each pelt of the raindrops on my skin, like the lash of a whip.
You broke Addy’s trust.
She asked you for one thing.
You left her alone when she told you she needs you.
You’re selfish, just like Mom, and Addy’s going to hate you just like she hates her.
I bolt past Owen, yanking on the handle with enough force to send it flying.
The barn door bounces aggressively off the metal stopper.
It ricochets halfway back before Owen gets ahold of it, slipping in behind me and sliding it all the way closed.
He huffs a laugh, shaking his head so water droplets fly everywhere.
My body is vibrating, and I pace the space between hay bales. “I can’t believe I let this happen.”
Owen walks over, rubbing his hands up and down my arms to warm me. “We’ll head back once the storm stops. It should only be a few hours.”
“In a few hours, I’ll have missed the spa trip, assuming they even go when they can’t find us. Fuck! They’re going to cancel the trip and this was Addy’s chance to win your mom over.”
“It’ll be okay,” he says calmly, like the world isn’t falling apart around me right now. “How could we have known a storm like this would come in?”
“We couldn’t, which is why I should have just gone straight there and straight back.”
“Sweetheart,” he says, brushing one of my wet curls behind my ear. “We’ll sort something out. It’s just a spa trip.”
“To you,” I say, louder than I want. “To you, it’s just a spa trip.
But to Addy, that massage or facial or whatever the fuck we were supposed to do—this whole damn wedding—is a representation of her future with your family.
And she asked for my help, trusted me when I’ve screwed up so many things for her.
And I broke that trust. I was selfish and—”
“Stop,” he says, his voice coming out sharp, and he paces a few steps away from me.
My heart screams, Here it is, Thea. That last push that sends him running for the hills.
If there’s anything my life has taught me, it’s that everyone has their limit.
Push hard enough, and they’ll eventually break.
And when they do, they’ll leave you behind.
Even knowing this, my traitorous heart held out hope that Owen would be different.
It’s crying out now, watching as he puts more and more distance between us.
When he turns back to me, there’s fire in his eyes.
“You are not selfish. From the second you stepped foot in North Carolina, you’ve done nothing but give to the people around you.
Keeping up this ruse—which I’m to blame for—so that Addy and Harrison’s day isn’t ruined.
Running all over these damn mountains to help Addy.
Working for free so Camila can get her medication. ”
“Yes, I’ve helped, but I’ve also had to work really hard not to screw things up, too. Do you know how many times I almost bit your mom’s head off in the past few days?”
“She’s deserved to have her head bitten off!” Owen says.
I laugh through the tears, and he smiles, his smallest of smiles. The one he gives when he’s almost embarrassed at having made me laugh.
He steps closer, taking my hand between his.
“From what I’ve seen, you only get angry when someone’s being treated badly, and it’s beautiful to watch.
You have the kindest heart, and you’re protective of your people.
That’s a good thing, and I hate every person in your past who made you think you’re anything less than perfect. ”
His words strike the middle of my chest, and I rub at the ache. “So everyone?” I whisper, unable to stop taking swings at myself.
“They’re idiots,” he says fiercely.
“Easy for you to say right now, but there’s normally a reason for a pattern.” I shrug, trying to brush off the way my insides feel like they’re being eviscerated. “I’m not the type of person people keep.”
Owen’s eyes fill with tears. “What if I want to keep you?”
My limbs shake as heat spreads through me with the most overwhelming sensation of fear and exhilaration. I’ve never been wanted, not beyond a few hookups, and it makes no sense that this man—this kind, generous, gorgeous man—would be the first. It doesn’t line up with my worldview at all.
But maybe he’s right. Maybe my worldview is skewed and there’s truth in what Cece told me on the mountain. That we believe what people say we are, and sometimes we need the right person at the right time to help us see ourselves clearly.
“Why?” I ask, stepping closer and bringing our bodies nearly flush. “Why do you want to keep me?”
Owen bites his bottom lip against his smile. “You’re just digging for compliments now.”
I shrug a little, running my hands up his chest. “Humor me.”
He drops his head, running his nose along the curve of my jaw. “Too many reasons to count. How about how your laugh invigorates me more than my morning coffee?”
“I do have a great laugh,” I say, and he smiles, the curve of it stamped onto my skin.
“How about the way everything inside me screams to touch you anytime you get within reach? To keep you close. That no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t make any of it feel fake.”
He presses a kiss to the underside of my jaw, letting his tongue swipe against the pulse point there, and I moan. My hands come to his shoulders, clutching them to keep from sliding to the floor.
“And when I’m with you, I don’t feel like the caretaker brother or reliable son or helpful cousin. I feel like I’m just me.”