Chapter 20
HARPER
“It’s my wedding day!” Tara gushed. “Can you believe the day is finally here?”
“Stand still,” Harper said with a smile. “I can’t fasten up the back of this dress with you dancing around all over the place.”
“Oh, I can’t help it!” Tara said giddily.
“I feel like I’ve been waiting for this day to come for a very long time.
You know, it was starting to feel like Max and I might never get married.
Like we might just be one of those couples that live together and raise our children together and spend our lives together, but that marriage wouldn’t be a part of that.
I had sort of resigned myself to that, actually.
And then he proposed, and I just couldn’t believe it. Romance isn’t dead after all.”
“Romance is very much alive,” Harper agreed, but she felt a sinking sensation in the pit of her stomach.
She was happy for her friend, of course.
She was thrilled about all the wonderful things that were happening for Tara, and she was overjoyed to see Tara’s dreams coming true.
Nobody deserved a little magic more than her best friend.
But at the same time, it hurt to know that that magic wasn’t going to be real for her.
Harper knew that she was going to be the kind of person Tara had been describing.
She would have her baby and raise it herself, and that would be a beautiful thing.
But marriage would not be part of the equation. That dream was dead on the vine.
“I wonder how the guys are doing,” Tara said. “I want to sneak over and see them.”
Harper laughed. “You know you can’t do that,” she said.
“Well, I don’t see why not,” Tara said stubbornly. “I know it’s not traditional for the bride and groom to see one another before the wedding, but what about my relationship with Max has been traditional so far?”
“Tradition has nothing to do with it. You can’t go see him because I’m not going to let you do that.
You deserve to have that big moment where you walk down the aisle and he sees you for the first time in this beautiful wedding gown.
I want you to see the look on his face when he sees how magnificent you look right now. We aren’t going to spoil that.”
“Okay, you’re right. I know you’re right. I’m just looking forward to that moment.”
“That will come soon enough. Appreciate this moment. Look around you. This is your wedding day. You’re putting on your dress, your makeup is done, your hair is done. When you look back on this day in the future, this right here is a moment you’re going to remember. You’re living it right now.”
“You are so right,” Tara said. “I don’t know what I would do without your perspective, Harper.”
“You’ll never have to find out,” Harper said with a smile.
“Well, we should toast this moment,” Tara said. “Before everything kicks off, you and I should take a moment to celebrate together. And I really want to thank you for all the hard work you’ve put into making this day memorable.”
Harper shook her head. “Nonsense. It was absolutely my pleasure. You know that I would do anything for you. And besides, wedding planning is what I love. I had an amazing time working on yours.”
“All the more reason to celebrate!” Tara turned away from the mirror and hurried over to the little mini fridge that had been plugged in on the far side of the room.
Harper had come in this morning and stocked that fridge with water bottles to make sure that everyone stayed hydrated throughout the day, and at first she thought her friend was just feeling a little thirsty.
But Tara bent down, opened the fridge, and produced a bottle of champagne.
“There are glasses on the shelf over there,” she said. “Can you get a couple of them down?”
Harper’s heart skipped a beat. She had thought about this element of the day, of course.
It was a wedding, and there would be toasting and drinking.
Now that she was pregnant, she couldn’t participate in any of that.
But she hadn’t thought about this situation.
She had assumed that all of the toasting would be taking place at the reception, when there would be dozens of people around and everyone would be distracted.
Nobody at the reception would notice if she held a glass to her lips and didn’t take a sip of it.
Tara would notice that now.
But she didn’t feel as if she could refuse a glass. Tara had clearly gone to the trouble of making sure that they had champagne to toast with this morning, and it was obvious that it meant a lot to her. Harper pulled the glasses down from the shelf Tara had indicated and brought them over.
Tara twisted the cork of the champagne bottle and popped it open carefully. “This is the good stuff,” she said. “My boss gave me this bottle when I announced our engagement, and I’ve been saving it for today.”
And it was already open. Harper felt a twist of guilt in the pit of her stomach, but she held out the glasses and allowed Tara to fill them both. She gave her friend one of the glasses and held on to the other.
“Cheers,” Tara suggested, raising her glass.
“No, hold on.” Harper could offer more than just pretending to drink expensive champagne. “Let me do this. Let me toast to you on your wedding day. I’m so happy for you. Max is a wonderful man, and I’m thrilled to see you getting everything you deserve, Tara.”
“This is a toast to you as well, Harper,” Tara insisted.
“I know exactly how much I asked of you when I asked you to organize this wedding. I know planning an event like this is a huge job, and I know most people pay you really well for it. You did me such a big favor. Such a massive kindness. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to pay you back for that.
All I can say is that I am so, so lucky to have a friend like you, and I will never take that for granted. ”
“You are amazing.” Harper’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m lucky too, Tara. You know, men are wonderful, and you have found a wonderful man, but at times like this I can’t help but think that all I really need in the world is my best friend.”
“Well, I’ll drink to that.” Tara raised her glass and took a long swallow.
Harper also raised her glass and touched it to her lips, but she didn’t drink.
It was possible that one small sip of champagne wouldn’t make much of a difference.
In fact, that was probably true. But she hadn’t consulted with a doctor about this question, and she was unwilling to take any risks when it came to the well-being of her baby.
She set the glass down on a nearby table.
She had hoped that Tara wouldn’t notice — that she would be so caught up in the excitement of her wedding day that she simply wouldn’t pay attention to minor details.
But Tara’s eyes went immediately to the still full glass of champagne.
“What’s the matter?” Tara asked. “Is it not good? I mean, I like it, but if it isn’t your taste, I can try to find something else for us to toast with. ”
“Don’t be silly,” Harper said. “You’re getting married in less than an hour. You’re not going searching for a different bottle of champagne right now.”
“But I wanted to drink with you before the ceremony,” Tara said. “I know it’s a silly thing, but it was part of my vision of the day.”
“It isn’t silly.” Harper looked away. “I’m sorry. I wish I felt up to it.”
“What’s wrong? Are you sick or something? Now I’m worried about you.”
“No, you don’t need to worry,” Harper assured her friend.
“Are you sure? If you’re not feeling well, maybe you should drink some water or something. I don’t want you passing out in the middle of the ceremony. Do we need to go to a clinic or something?”
“Of course not! Tara, you worry too much. I’m completely fine. I just don’t feel up to drinking today.”
“I understand not wanting to drink much, but this is just a sip of champagne. Would it really bother you that much?” Tara’s warm eyes were filled with concern. “If something’s wrong, you can tell me, you know.”
“I promise you, nothing is wrong. I don’t want you to worry about me. I want you to focus on the fact that this is your wedding day.”
Tara’s eyes widened. “Oh, my God!”
Harper turned away quickly. It was obvious that Tara had pieced things together. “Why don’t we do last touches on your makeup?” she suggested, hoping to change the subject.
“Forget the makeup,” Tara said. “I know what’s going on with you. Harper… are you pregnant?”
Harper’s heart sank. She couldn’t even look at her friend. This was supposed to be Tara’s big day. Everything today was supposed to be about Tara and Max, and the last thing Harper would have wanted was to make it about her own personal drama.
“Look at me,” Tara insisted.
Harper turned to face her, and Tara gasped. “Oh, my God,” she said again. “You are pregnant. I can see it on your face. Don’t bother trying to lie to me about it. You’re a terrible liar.”
“I never meant to lie to you,” Harper said. “I just didn’t want to make your day all about me.”
“Don’t worry about that! Harper, when did you find out?”
“About a week ago. I was going to tell you after you got back from the honeymoon.”
“So, you… you’ve decided to go through with it?”
Harper let out a sigh. “You know I’ve always wanted to be a mother,” she said. “Now life is giving me that opportunity, and I’m not going to throw it back. I know the situation is a little bit crazy, but this might be the only chance I get to have a child of my own.”
“But who’s the father? I mean, it’s that guy you went out with a few weeks ago, right? The one you told me you were never going to see again?”
“Yes, it’s that guy.”
“Have you told him? What did he say? Is he going to be involved? Is he excited?” Tara was practically bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet. “When do I get to meet the guy?”
“Oh, my God. That’s so many questions.”
“Well, I have a lot of questions! I can’t believe you’re pregnant and you didn’t tell me!”
“I’ll answer anything you want me to,” Harper promised, even though she knew it was a lie.
She would have a conversation with her friend about this, of course, but she had no idea whether she would ever tell Tara who her baby’s father was.
She certainly couldn’t tell Tara before she had told Theo.
And she had made up her mind not to tell Theo until the wedding was over.
At that point, there would be nothing tying the two of them together.
There would be nothing compelling her to ever see him again if he decided he didn’t want to be involved with their child.
They would be able to cut ties and go their separate ways, and that would be for the best.
Even though it didn’t exactly feel that way right now.