Chapter 40 #2
“I did something. Coach might kick me off the team for it, but I did it,” Grace continues before I can respond.
“What?” I ask, my heart thundering in my ears with fear now.
“You know McCall writes for the campus sports magazine. I gave her the tip. She’s going to investigate it and force the athletic department to address it.
And I’m giving her pictures of our dressing room to show the disparity between our facilities and the ones for sports like yours.
I’m going to be interviewed, too. I’m going to tell Coach on Monday, and hopefully she won’t kick me off the team for it, but I can’t sit here and let them make this decision without giving any of us a voice. I won’t do it.”
I stare at Grace, who finally exhales after all the words come out of her mouth. I swallow hard before speaking. “You,” I say, staring at her, “are so fucking badass and brave and I’m so damn proud of you.”
“I don’t know if it’s brave or crazy, but I have to fight to save my team. You know how much I love artistic swimming. And if the school were in dire straits and it made no sense to have our program, I would accept it. But I don’t think it is, Wy.”
Guilt floods me as I think of our flashy new facilities that are on a professional level, no expenses spared when creating them. And here is Grace, dealing with an old dressing room and sub-par facilities from the same school.
Suddenly it hits me. We’re at the same school.
I am on one of the premier teams at OCU. I have a voice because of hockey.
And I can use it.
“Grace. If you can confirm this is happening, what if the other teams banded with you in support? Like with fundraising and publicity?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m in with you. I can speak out as a member of the men’s hockey team, and that will get attention.
I can tell Coach I’m going to do it, but he’s all about building leadership and he would probably be glad I’m doing something like that because it’s not like me.
I want to do it because this is wrong. You all should have a say after investing so much into your sport.
Some of you even came here because of the opportunity.
Fuck them if they think you all are just going to roll over because they don’t want to pay for it. ”
“I don’t expect you to do that,” Grace says, shaking her head. “I’m just telling you what I’m doing.”
“And I’m telling you what I’m doing,” I say firmly.
“What about your dad?”
What about my dad. Things start to become clearer in my mind. I think of Grace. Of the athletic programs potentially on the chopping block. I think of how I’ve lived my whole life without making many decisions for myself, just letting my dad have control everywhere but on the ice.
Just like Grace let her mother have control everywhere but in the water.
But as I stare at her, I see she’s found herself. These are all Grace’s decisions. She doesn’t care what her mom thinks because she’s determined to live her own life. She’s brave and strong, and I admire how she’s taken control of things.
I sit still, gripping her hand in mine, and just like that, I know. I want to do the same. I’m ready to do it.
I want to be a leader who speaks out. I might not have an A or a C on my jersey, but I have a voice as a hockey player. I can use it for good. To help other athletes. To help Grace.
“I don’t care anymore,” I tell her simply, and I can’t believe how easy it is to say.
“Grace. I was going to tell you tonight that I didn’t want to introduce you to my parents when they come in next week for my hockey game.
I was afraid of how my dad might react, and I didn’t want you to see that.
I—I was afraid you’d see what a shitshow my family is and want no part of me. ”
“Wyatt,” she says, gripping my hand tightly, “I don’t care if your family is crazy. I have my own crazy. No matter what your dad thinks, or says, I’m still going to love you. They can’t change that.”
I look at her and I can see she means it.
“I know,” I say. “And it’s time his interference ends.
I’m going to tell him about you. I’m going to tell him I don’t want to talk about hockey twenty-four-seven with him.
I have a life at OCU and I’m going to live it.
I just want to be his son.” My voice grows rough on the last word, and I have to get myself together before continuing.
“And I’m going to live my dreams instead of his. ”
Grace’s eyes grow shiny with unshed tears. “I love you so much.”
“I’m not this version of me without you,” I say. “I love you.”
“Wy?”
I gaze at her.
“I’m not this version of me without you, either,” she says, her voice wobbling.
More emotions swirl within me. Grace makes me a better man. I took a leap when I decided to date her, a huge one. One I never would have dreamed of doing because of all the crap my dad put in my head. No. More like all the things he would have done if he were me.
Not playing in Canada was my first pushback.
Grace, however, was the biggest risk I’ve ever taken. She has changed my life, and I’m so damn glad she has.
Now it’s time to go further. To claim everything that is mine, to be the person I want to be.
But first? I have a date tonight.
With the girl I love.