65
GAbrIELA DUARTE
The triplets made the Palazzo a home in less than two days.
Heitor persuaded Cris to take him along the service passage to the old wine cellar. Camila befriended the gardener’s cat. Noah spent part of the morning looking at a photograph album with Sofia. I found them in the library.
“Here’s your father,” his great-grandmother said, pointing to a childhood picture of Luca.
In the photograph, he was six, with dirty knees and the same pale streak as the boys.
“He smiled more,” Noah observed.
“It was an afternoon during vacation,” Sofia said. “His mother had just arrived.”
“Daddy’s mom?”
“Yes. She died when he was ten.”
Noah looked at the photograph again.
“Did you help him?”
Sofia looked at the picture.
“I tried. But I didn’t always know how.”
“Did you cry too?”
“Yes.”
“Did he see?”
“Sometimes he saw me cry. Other times, I tried to hide it.”
Noah closed the album.
“I cry with Mommy.”
I stroked his hair. Luca was watching us from the hallway. Later, I saw Sofia touch his arm and ask him to sit with her.
When I passed the old music room, I found Luca and Noah on the piano bench.
“Great-Grandma told me about your mom,” our son said.
“That’s all right.”
“Do you miss her?”
Luca kept his hands on the keys.
“I do. Very much.”
“Could she play?”
“Yes. She taught me.”
Luca played a simple melody. Noah pressed a key, and within minutes they’d made an awkward little sequence. Heitor ran in and turned it into noise. Camila danced. I stopped in the doorway to watch, laughing when Heitor bungled his bow.
Luca noticed me and started the melody again. Camila danced with Heitor until they collapsed laughing on the couch. Noah played the last note three times, testing the sound.
That afternoon, we went to the garden for a treasure hunt Luca and the gardener had prepared.
There were illustrated cards, clues about the plants, and a box of seeds at the end.
Cris went with Heitor. Sofia waited on a bench with my mother.
I stayed near the pergola while Camila and Noah searched for the first clue with Luca.
“You’re happy,” Cris said, coming over.
I didn’t deny it.
“I managed to work this morning without going downstairs at every noise,” I told him.
Cris looked at Luca, crouched beside Noah. Heitor ran back for help with a card. Cris showed him the picture of a leaf, and the boy set off toward the right bed.
I looked at Cris.
“Are you still going to Lisbon after this?”
He drew a breath.
“Yes. I’ve confirmed everything. I’m staying a week.”
“It’ll be good to have that time.”
He nodded but didn’t look back at the children.
“Are you all right with me, Cris?”
“I’m still getting used to it. I like being here. I’ll also like a few days without watching you two look for each other in the garden.”
My face grew hot.
“I didn’t mean…”
“I know. I’m not asking you to hide it. I’m just answering.”
“I’m afraid we won’t find our way back to being all right.”
“We’ll have to find out. You don’t need to ask me every day if I’m over it yet.”
I looked at Heitor, who was holding up the card to call Cris over.
“When I get back to Brazil, I want to organize my office hours better,” he continued. “I’ve already agreed with your mother on which days I can pick up the boys.”
“I saw the message. Thank you.”
“And I’m keeping some evenings for myself.”
“No medicine, lunchboxes, or anyone asking you to find a dinosaur.”
“I’m not sure I’ll recognize the silence.”
We laughed. For the first time in the conversation, he seemed less tense.
I hugged him. Cris held me for several long seconds and kissed my forehead. When I looked up, I saw Luca across the garden. Pain crossed his face, but he turned his attention to Camila. He left the moment to us.
Later, when the children were asleep after a noisy dinner, I went back to the garden. Luca was on the bench beneath the pergola with a closed book.
“I spoke to Cris. He’s going to Lisbon when we leave here.”
He stood.
“He told me about the appointments.”
“Ever since I answered his proposal, I keep trying to find out whether he’s all right. Today he asked me to stop asking.”
Luca set the book on the bench and waited.
“I said no because I didn’t want to marry him. And I still love you.”
Luca went still.
“How long have you known?”
“A long time. I wanted it to be over. It would have been easier to look at you without remembering everything I still wanted.”
“And that scares you.”
“It does. Today I managed to work while you were with them. Now I’m here telling you this, and part of me wants to run back to my room.”
He heard my confession without moving closer. I saw how much restraint it cost him and chose to close the distance myself.
“But I don’t want to run tonight.”
Luca closed his eyes. When he opened them, there were tears.
“I want to be with you, Gabi.”
“I want to try too.”
He held out his hand. I laid mine in it.
“Slowly,” I asked.
“I’m going to want to go faster.”
“I imagine you are.”
“You tell me when it’s too much.”
I moved closer and touched his face.
“And don’t agree with me just to make this conversation end well.”
“I couldn’t even agree with you about the villa.”
“You’ll learn about that yet.”
Luca smiled. I kissed him slowly, my fingers caught in his collar. When we drew apart, I heard footsteps on the path. My mother was coming toward us with Noah, who carried a pillow.
“He wanted to say good night,” she explained.
I felt my face warm.
“Couldn’t you sleep?”
“Heitor won’t stop talking.”
“We’ll ask him to be quieter,” Luca said.
Noah came closer and took a hand from each of us.
“Will you read one more?” he asked his father.
“A short one. Is your mother coming too?”
“Yes,” I answered. My mother took the pillow before it dragged on the ground. We went inside with Noah between us.
The next morning, Camila showed me a yellow rose she could see from the window. Noah wanted to take books to the room, and Heitor insisted on exploring the service passage again. I promised to go with him after lunch.
I also reserved a room in the east wing to work in during our stay. It had a table wide enough to spread out the plans and a window overlooking the children in the garden.