Chapter 17 #3
I look between the three of them. Jake is loudly cursing at Ethan while Caleb is making sure he stays out of reach of the latter. I wouldn’t say they are goofing off, but it shows me that I was wrong about Ethan’s relationship with his family. They’re definitely close.
Feeling a little out of my element, I mutter, “I’m just going to call a moving company and?—”
Ethan glances at his brothers. “These two are already here. Don’t bother. They’ll be doing all the driving today.”
Caleb stretches his arms over his head. “I don’t mind. As long as Ethan’s paying for gas. ”
“You and Jake can split it,” Ethan says coolly.
Caleb makes a face. “What? Why?—”
“Consider it punishment. Natalie, pack your essentials first. Caleb will drop them off.”
“Hold up.” Jake straightens up and looks between the two of us. “Wait just a minute. Why is she moving her things to your apartment? Is she moving in with you?”
“I thought that was obvious.” Ethan takes my cup of tea from me and puts it aside. But Jake isn’t done.
“Why? Are you two together?”
Caleb chooses this moment to intervene. “Dude, they were practically making out at dinner that day. And they’ve been sleeping together ever since they went to Chicago.”
I feel my face grow hot, and Ethan snaps, “I didn’t call the two of you here to give a play-by-play.”
Jake ignores his twin and focuses on Caleb. “How do you know?”
“Megan.” Caleb smirks. “She told me everything. Although, moving in together this fast feels like overkill.”
He studies the two of us, crossing his arms over his chest. “Something’s fishy. I smell it.”
“And what’s Lucas got to do with this?” Jake pitches in. “I heard you mention that snake—No offense, Natalie.”
I just shrug. “Snake, weasel, I don’t really care. I don’t have time to hang around and talk. Ethan, they’re your problem. You deal with them.”
Caleb lifts his brows. “You’re going to let her talk to you like that? You don’t let us talk to you in that tone.”
“She’s not you,” Ethan says curtly.
I walk away, feeling a little overwhelmed by all this chaos. I’m not used to such loud and physical interactions.
It doesn’t take me long to pack my clothes. I don’t own that many as it is. With two suitcases filled, I’m about to lug them out of the room when I hear Jake’s voice. “Let me. Ethan’s gone to the lobby.”
“I can do it,” I grunt, trying to pull the suitcase, but it’s stuffed to the brim, and I can only drag it a few inches before my arms feel like they will rip off.
He takes it from me. “You should really work out more.”
I glare at him. “I don’t need your help.”
“I want to help.”
“I said I don’t need it.”
His smile fades, and he sets the suitcase down, his own eyes narrowed into tiny slits. “Fine. I get it. You’re pissed at me over the background search. But if you’re hoping for an apology, you can forget it.”
“Charming, my ass,” I mutter, pulling my suitcase away from him.
He pulls it right back, scowling. “I have every right to protect Ethan from you and your family.”
“He’s a big boy,” I hiss, both of us holding on to the handle of the suitcase at this point. “He’s perfectly capable of protecting himself.”
“Not when it comes to you!” Jake growls.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I sneer.
“He’s mad about you, always has been. You’re his biggest weakness, and you’re the only one who has the ability to hurt him. Our whole family sees it. You just like playing deaf, dumb, and blind to the fact.”
“Hey!” Caleb hurries in. “What the hell are you guys shouting about?”
“Nothing.” I grind my teeth. “I’m well aware Ethan cares for me?—”
“Are you?” Jake stares at me, his brows knitting together. “Because you sure don’t act that way.”
“And just how am I supposed to act?” I shove the suitcase at him, making him stagger back. “Do you expect me to kiss his ass? Or do you expect me to fawn over him like a love-struck teen?”
“At least do something, and don’t treat him like an afterthought!”
“Jake,” Caleb cautions. “Cool it.”
“She doesn’t even appreciate him.” Jake’s voice is harsh.
“Her brother fucked him over. All of Ethan’s savings went into that company.
He didn’t take a cent from our parents, and Lucas just fucking stabbed him in the back.
Do you know how devastated my brother was?
Do you have any idea of the damage you caused?—”
My jaw trembles, but I straighten up, my voice quiet. “Me? The damage I caused? That wasn’t me. I didn’t do that.”
“But your brother did. You Thornes only know how to use Ethan. God, I don’t know what he sees in you?—”
The harsher his words, the more it feels like I’m sinking underwater, listening to my mother screaming at me, telling me how worthless I am.
What does Ethan see in me?
He must see something, or I wouldn’t be standing here. Even I know I can’t be that good of a lay. My hand comes to touch my belly, a cold gnawing tension seeping into me.
“I—”
“You can’t even speak nicely to him,” Jake finishes, his eyes flashing. “If you gave two damns about him, you wouldn’t be sniping at him every minute you’re?—”
“That’s enough.” I don’t know how I find my voice, but I can’t listen to his anymore. “You’ve said quite a lot.”
I cover the distance between us, leaving only a few steps.
“Who do you think you are to judge me? You don’t know an ounce of what I’ve been through.
Just because you had my life ripped apart, you think you know everything?
I was caught between this fight between Ethan and Lucas. He lost his money? ”
I stab my finger in my chest, my voice furious. “I got my heart broken. I was used. I was beaten to the point of death. And I was forced into homelessness, all my bank accounts frozen. All because Ethan seduced me, and I let him.”
My lower lip curls in cold burning anger.
“I get it. You want to protect your brother. I don’t blame you.
It took me a long time to stop blaming him for what happened to me.
But he did break my heart. He used me like I was nothing.
I still have nightmares when I wake up thinking my brother is sitting on me, his fists flying in my face.
I still double-check my locks because I’m scared he’s going to break in someday.
And let’s be honest, if Ethan hadn’t pursued me, I wouldn’t be standing here saying this. ”
Caleb’s watching me, his face white, and I dimly wonder if this is the first time he’s hearing this.
I swallow, trying to let my anger speak and not the anguish that is simmering underneath it.
“And you’re right, I’m not very warm towards your brother.
I don’t know how to be. Every time he touches me, I keep thinking that he’s going to abandon me in the next heartbeat.
That’s all I know. Abandonment. I don’t want to fall in love with him again because the idea fucking scares me.
He blew up my entire life once again. Who’s fighting for me, Jake? Who’s fighting with him to protect me?”
He lowers his gaze, and I sneer. “No one, that’s who.
I’ve always been alone, at every turn of my life.
I’ve accepted it. I didn’t want Ethan. He pursued me.
Both times, he pursued me. I didn’t cast some spell on him or twist his arm.
But you—You know everything. You know everything that has happened to me, and you still have the audacity to stand there and tell me what a shitty person I am.
I have to say, it takes balls. I’ll give you that. ”
He flinches now, and I say harshly, “What happens between Ethan and me is our business. It’s not yours, and it’s not Caleb’s, or anybody else’s.
If you don’t want to be here, leave. You want to tell me what my worth is?
As a human, I can’t answer that. But I’m very good at my job.
I’m very well-known in the industry. I worked hard to reach where I am.
And no one can take that from me, not you and not Ethan.
If you have a problem with me, talk to your brother.
I don’t want to see you. I’m sick of people telling me how worthless they think I am.
I’m the only one who decides my worth now.
And if you disagree, there’s the fucking door. I hope it hits you on the way out.”
I push him now, and he doesn’t resist.
“You too!” I snap at Caleb. “Get out of my house. I can take my own suitcases. I don’t need your help.”
They leave, and I close my bedroom door, sinking to the ground, mumbling, “I don’t need anybody’s help. I don’t need anybody. I’m fine. I’m just fine.”
Pulling my knees to my chest, I fold my arms on them and just bury my head in my arms as the tears come.
And they just don’t stop.