C H A P T E R 5 0
After breakfast I intended to confront Ethan once and for all but Mr. Jenson's voice stopped me. He beckoned me to his office.
When I stepped in, he was at his desk, working. For a second, I could actually picture Ethan in his place - old but still dedicated to his work.
"Juliet. What have I been hearing about you from Ethan? You went to his workplace and stayed there the whole day?" He asked as soon as I took a seat in front of him.
My smile dropped and my eyes widened as I realised Ethan blabbed about me to him.
"Why did you do that? He complained to me that he found your presence intruding and uncomfortable. What's your explanation?"
"I-I," I stammered and blushed. I hadn't expected him to tell Mr. Jenson everything like a little kid would do to his parent.
"I felt like he was avoiding me purposefully with the excuse of work.
I tried several times to confront him about it but he dodged my questions each time.
So I had no other way than to force the answers out of him.
" If he was going to involve dad into this, I might as well let him know the full truth about the situation or else my actions could be misunderstood.
"I don't know what's going on between you two but I don't want you to interfere with his work. Personal matters should be resolved at home. And how could you be so reckless? What if someone had recognized you and taken pictures? I thought you told me you were not ready to face the media."
"I'm not! I'm not ready. And I'm sorry I acted careless and annoying. I promise this won't repeat."
"Good. Ethan is here to learn from me. I don't want him to get distracted or disturbed by anything and I want to be a good host and guide him. From tomorrow he will be accompanying me to the company and closely observe the workings and how I manage everything."
"Yes, I understand." I nodded meekly.
"Good. Now if you want anything go and buy it." He shooed me off before slyly adding,"Except for a human."
I groaned. I doubted anyone in this house would ever let me forget that one thing I did but actually didn't do.
Stepping out of the office, I didn't need to check to see if Ethan was gone or not because I was sure he was.
Chasing after him was tiring. No matter how fast I was, he was always one step ahead of me. Not to mention it was starting to hurt my pride as I was not the type to chase after someone.
So I decided that I'd make one last attempt to talk things out with him and if he still chose to be childish and avoid me, then I wouldn't pursue him anymore.
When night time rolled around, I was waiting for Ethan to show up at dinner but he did not. I took that as another sign of something not right between us.
I waited in my room, my ears perked for any sounds that would alert me of his presence.
Precisely half an hour after midnight, I heard soft footsteps from the hallway which sounded like they were getting nearer.
I got off the bed and calmly walked towards the door. When I pulled it open, Ethan met me in front of our doors. He seemed a little surprised, probably wondering why I was still awake.
But he turned away and was about to put a hand on his door knob to open it when I took a few steps towards him.
"Ethan," I said, grabbing his door knob before he could. His back faced me, my nose almost touching his shoulder.
He turned around slowly to gaze down at me, his scent engulfing me.
"What is it? I'm tired so I want to sleep. I'll talk to you tomorrow." He said but made no move to leave.
I had expected something like that. But I ignored his excuse and got straight to the point, very well knowing that if I didn't say what I wanted to quick enough, he'd just run away again.
"Something's happened between us. I'd be stupid to not notice and I'm sure you've noticed as well.
I want to talk to you without you making an attempt to run away the second I touch on this topic. "
He didn't say anything and continued to look at me.
"I don't know what I did to make you avoid me at all costs.
It's actually starting to hurt me. What happened?
What did I do wrong? I've noticed that you've been like this since the wedding.
Did something happen at the wedding that made you start to hate me again?
" He didn't answer so I continued, "I'm telling you I really have no idea why you're like this so please just tell me.
Avoiding me is not the solution. We should talk things out like adults and see if we can come up with a solution to our problems. We were such good friends two months back. "
"Oh, so it took you two months to notice that I stopped talking to you and avoiding you? I must've been a pretty insignificant thing in your life if it took you that long to realize something was wrong." His words were cold and his face gave nothing away.
I shook my head at him frantically. "It's not like that. I was just busy with some things-"
"Like your boyfriend Keith? Don't worry, I understand." His words were laced with sarcasm but I detected hurt in his eyes.
I narrowed my eyes at him when he cut me.
"Keith is not my boyfriend. I don't know how he feels about me but I don't see him in that way.
I'll make this clear for you. And you were never not significant to me.
I was genuinely busy with some things and had no time for anyone, not even Olivia as she was busy with.
..her things as well. Now will you tell me what the problem is? "
Ethan didn't answer but he looked somewhat relieved.
"But why would it even matter to you if Keith was my boyfriend or not? Why would it make you so upset?"
He started to look a little panicked at my questions as he avoided my eyes.
Hesitantly I stepped closer, eliminating the distance between us. He took a quick breath through his nose and peered down at me. I put a hand on his heart and felt it thumping wildly under my fingers. I thought I had imagined that sound but it really was Ethan's heart beating fast and loud.
"Your heart is beating so fast. You are all fidgety. Why am I making you uncomfortable?"
He gulped audibly. We stared at each other until he grabbed my shoulders and pushed me back a little to put distance between us.
I couldn't help but smirk a little. "I'm flattered to know that I can get a reaction like that out of you."
Ethan didn't say anything but I could see it in his eyes that he felt exposed. After a few moments he was back to his old self. There was no hint of the previous nervousness that I induced in him. Unexpectedly he started towards me.
"What're you doing?"
"The same thing you just did." It was now his turn to smirk. I felt like a little prey getting cornered by a predator.
My back touched my room door and I fumbled for the door knob but Ethan was quick to block me from escaping by putting his hand on it.
"Aren't you getting a little uncomfortable too?"
"I'm not! It's just a little hot in here," I panted as I fanned my face. I really hated how the tables turned in just a few seconds.
He continued to watch me which was making me antsy and enfeebling my feet.
Suddenly he was closer to me than he ever was.
He snaked an arm around my waist and pulled me closer.
His other hand cupped me cheek and he brought his face to my ear.
His nose tickled the outline of my ear sending pleasurable tickles all over my body and his warm breath fanned my neck.
It felt as if we were trapped in a closed space, just the two of us.
I struggled to breathe evenly, trying my best to look unperturbed at our intimacy.
After a while, he whispered into my ear. "This closeness bothers you too, right? We're not supposed to be like this. We shouldn't feel like this towards each other. Do you still want me to be close to you?"
And then he released me and took several steps away from me.
"Doesn't it feel great to put distance between us? Doesn't it make you less nervous when we aren't close?"
I didn't reply but he could see that my answer was yes.
Yes, it felt a lot better for my heart now that he wasn't so close to me. I felt my heart beat slow down to normal which I hadn't realized was beating fast before.
"Is that why you've been avoiding me?"
"The reason is not entirely that. There's a much bigger reason."
"What is it?"
He shook his head. "You might run away again," He chuckled humorlessly.
Those words sparked a conflicting curiosity within me. I wanted to know, yet after hearing him say that, I also didn't want to know.
"Is it that bad?"
"I think it's disastrous. You might have a different opinion. I don't know if it's good or bad. It sometimes feels so good and right and sometimes just wrong and horrible."
We didn't say anything for a few more minutes during which we exchanged glances at each other and stares when we thought the other wasn't looking.
"Good night, Juliet."
Without any further words, he disappeared behind his door and I was left standing alone in the hallway.
I entered my own room, my head reeling from what just happened.
Now I definitely understood that we should put a lot of space between us.
Ethan had some sort of proximity problem with me. He liked to be close to me in a way friends shouldn't. And the scary part was I did too.
Ethan and I could no longer be friends. That thought sent a dull ache to my heart. That meant not talking to each other and not looking at each other, pretending as if another person doesn't reside in the room opposite of mine and being careful to not have eye contact at the dinner table.
I didn't know if we could ever be friends again like before but I knew that I wanted Ethan in my life one way or the other. I never realized just when he made a place for himself in my heart that the moment I woke up the next morning would remind me of his absence from then on.
Things were hard. We liked each other's company but we couldn't even be friends. I had a secret and he had a girlfriend who could potentially ruin my life if she ever got to know about last night or the previous few times we had been that close.
So I talked myself into forgetting him. I believed the harder I tried, the easier it would get.
I purposefully went down for breakfast one hour later than I usually did because that meant that Ethan had already left with my dad for work.
The rest of the day after that was easy because he wasn't there. I hung out with Amelia and then Keith and then studied the rest of the time.
Dinner was a little awkward because he was sat right in front of me on the other side of the table so I had to constantly look down at my dish or from left to right. To make matters worse, we accidentally bumped feet a few times.
After dinner, I retreated to my room until next morning.
Although this was the first day of us avoiding each other like the plague, I had already started feeling his absence and fun things and conversations with Keith didn't seem that fun anymore.
One thing I found weird was that Olivia refused to hang out with me.
I had asked her four times that day and she had adamantly declined to play a game of badminton or tennis with the excuse of her being busy with her studies.
I knew that we were drifting away and I hated it.
I missed the carefree and fun days we had when we were back home.
She was my partner in crime, quite literally sometimes and I didn't like that we didn't spend as much time as we did before.
I couldn't help but notice that she was always in a bad mood. Whenever I tried to talk to her, she would look irritated and it seemed like she didn't want to near me which confused me. I was pretty sure I didn't do anything wrong to her.
It was bad enough that I couldn't talk to Ethan, I didn't not want to talk to Olivia too.
But I decided to give it a few days. Maybe she was just stressed about something completely different that had nothing to do with me. I told myself that she'd come around after a few days.
The only person I could think of hanging out with, without any worries was Keith. He made me feel so comfortable and welcomed. He was always a great person to talk to. I'd always learn something from him.
It was only the second day since I stopped talking to Ethan.
Keith must have sensed I wasn't in a very bright mood so he made me a yogurt bowl with fruits arranged to resemble a cat's face. It was so adorable, I almost didn't want to eat it.
The strawberries were sliced in the middle and made up the ears. Sliced bananas with blueberries made the eyes and a strawberry slice cut horizontally made up the cat's nose with a blueberry on top. Bananas were sliced vertically to make the cutest whiskers I'd ever seen.
"Thank you!" I smiled which Keith returned.
"Mind telling me what had gotten you into a sour mood earlier?"
I shrugged. "It's nothing and I think you can't be of much help anyway. Aren't you getting a yogurt bowl for yourself?"
Keith rubbed the back of his neck. "Is it alright if I do?"
I rolled my eyes. "Of course it is. Why would you even ask that? From the time I've known you I realized you are a lot cautious about everything you do. Have you never broken any rules before?"
"No," He said shyly.
"Thought so. But seriously, don't overthink everything you do.
You worry about trivial things like is it okay if you eat with me or sit with me.
You act as if we have a land and sky difference between us which I really don't like.
You are my friend so act like one and stop overanalyzing everything you do.
Now make yourself a delicious yogurt bowl. " I commanded.
Keith smiled at me before he got a bowl for himself. We sat in silence for sometime, eating our own food.
"Keith, how old are you?"
He raised his eyebrows at my random question. "Just turned thirty seven about twenty day ago."
"What?!"
"Yeah. It was my birthday...on fifteenth August."
"You didn't tell me?!"
"Well, I didn't exactly wanted to go around telling everyone it was my birthday."
"But still, you could've told me! How dare you not tell me. Gosh, and I thought we were friends."
Keith snorted. "Some friend you are. Couldn't you have found out? After all you are the great Juliet Jenson. You never asked me either."
I narrowed my eyes at him and he instantly looked like he regretted saying that, clearly thinking that he overstepped his boundaries.
I burst out laughing at his expressions. "I'm sorry I didn't pay attention to when your birthday was. I realize I'm a terrible friend. So belated happy birthday, Keith and I'm sorry."
He waved off my apologies. "Eh, birthdays aren't much of a big deal to me anyway."
"How can you say that? It was your birthday. It's a big deal. So what was I doing on that day and what did you do?"
"Well, as usual, you were busy running after Ethan on that day. And I didn't do much on my birthday. Baked a little cake for myself and my friends here wished me and we had a little celebration."
His reply made me feel bad for him. I regretted wasting so much time on Ethan.
It was obviously going to lead to nowhere.
And I was so busy obsessing over Ethan that I completely forgot that there were other people in the world.
I missed Keith's birthday and I was incredibly upset to hear that he had to bake a cake for himself and that there was not much of a celebration.
"Why didn't you go to your family to celebrate?"
"Actually, I think no one remembered my birthday. I didn't get any calls. I don't blame them. I have a big family. It's impossible to remember each and everyone's birthday." He laughed it off.
Keith was trying his best to sound okay with that but I knew that deep down he was sad that no one even wished him a happy birthday. I almost cried.
"I'm really sorry." Was all I could say to him to which he assured me that it was okay and that birthdays were not that big of a deal to him, repeating what he had earlier which sounded a lot like him trying to convince himself of that just so he didn't get sad over no one remembering his birthday.
At that moment, I knew I had to take away his sadness. An idea bloomed in my mind to do just that.