CHAPTER 36
MYLES
I hear the shoes squeaking on the linoleum outside the classroom before I see him. Sam bursts through the door, eyes lighting up when he sees me standing behind my desk, and if that isn’t something to be proud of, I don’t know what is.
“I fucking knew it!” He shouts, beaming.
“Language, Sam,” I scold him.
“I knew you’d be allowed back; the whole thing was dumb.”
I laugh at his tone. “Dumb is certainly one word for it.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” He demands, folding his arms over his coat. “You said you were gonna text me when the result came back.”
“Maybe I wanted to surprise you.”
“Sir, I thought you might be in hiding! That’s what you did after you dumped your girl, so why would I be any different?”
“Those situations are slightly different, Sam.”
“They’re literally exactly the same. About the same thing.”
“Yes, well you’ve never been my girlfriend. And abandoning a foster kid seems like a pretty shitty thing to do when I know how it feels.”
Sam mutters something unintelligible. “Anyway, have you spoken to your lady yet?”
“No, and I’m probably not going to.”
“What, why?”
“Because I’m not good enough for her and she deserves better than a flake like me.”
“You’re not a flake. Yeah, you might have skipped out on her, which was a terrible mistake, but you’re not a real flake. And you can still fix it, which would make you even less of a flake.”
“This is all very flattering and encouraging, but I’m pretty sure Sheridan doesn’t want to talk to me.”
“How do you know if you don’t even try?”
I give him a perturbed look. “What is with you this morning? Did you stay up past your bedtime watching motivational speeches or something?”
“No, I’m just obviously way more intelligent than you.”
“Obviously.”
“Will you do it for me?” He bats his eyelashes at me.
“No. Now go to form before you’re late.”
Sam snorts. “Sir, you know we’ve got ages before form. Stop trying to get rid of me.”
I have to laugh. The kid is observant. I haven’t told him that I’ve started the fostering process. It’s a long one and will likely take a few months, plus I haven’t had my DBS check yet and if I don’t get past that then I won’t be fostering any children. But if I do get approved to foster him then he’ll be the one trying to get rid of me, not the other way around.
“I have stuff to do before form starts and you are distracting me. I haven’t been here for months, and I want to see the status of all my classes, so unless you can be quiet, I really need to concentrate.”
He sighs. “Fine, I’ll leave you alone.”
“Come and see me at break time if you’re so desperate for my company.”
“No, that’s lame.”
“Thought as much. Behave. I’ll take you home later if you want.”
“Yes! No bus,” he shouts on his way out. “Oh, hi Miss Bennett.”
I think my soul has left my body. I knew seeing Brinsley again was inevitable given we’re colleagues, but I didn’t expect her to hunt me down the second I got let back into the building.
“Morning, Sam.”
I glance up again at her voice and she appears in the doorway, watching the teenager head off down the corridor. Then she turns to face me with a scarily calm expression.
“Myles.” She may seem calm, but her voice is tighter than Paulson’s leather belt.
“Brin.”
She shuts the door behind her and crosses her arms. “I thought I’d come and see if the rumours were true.”
“What rumours would they be?” I remain as still as possible. I don’t want to fight her but I’m sure she’s looking for one.
“That you’re here. That your face is messed up.” That you’re not hiding anymore is what she doesn’t say, but I know it’s implied.
“I’m here, and my face is messed up. But it’s better than it was.”
“You did a pretty good job with Nash’s face, too, I noticed.”
“Yeah, well…we talked it out and we’ve forgiven each other.”
“I don’t think there was much talking involved.”
Her voice has gotten sharper, and I don’t blame her. “No,” is all I can think to say.
She nods, her lips pressed tightly together as she scans the room. “I just want to be clear about something, Myles, so that we’re both on the same page. I don’t condone what Nash did, and Beau is an idiot. I’m not on their side of any of this, even if they have both apologised and Sheridan has forgiven them. But if you think I’ve forgiven you for running off and breaking my sister’s heart because you were scared, I can assure you I have not. You’re a coward, and you have a lot of grovelling to do before we’re anywhere close to being friends again.”
“I know,” I say through a rough voice. “I think I convinced myself that I’d be let go, and it did scare me. I was terrified, and I know I’ve never been good enough for her. This whole thing just kind of cemented it for me, and I panicked that maybe one day she’d leave me again like everyone else always has.”
“And you left first,” Brin concludes. “I get it, but your first mistake is grouping Sheridan in with a bunch of people who failed you, when she’s never done that. Even now, after you abandoned her, she’s still Team Myles. She still defends you. I don’t know much, but I know my sister and I know she’s still in love with you.”
The wooden desk creaks and I realise it’s because I’ve got a white-knuckle grip on it. My knees are weak, and I need to sit down but that feels rude. “Yeah, I’m…still in love with her, too.”
“Then fix it, you idiot. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and fix it.” In the next breath Brinsley is standing right next to me, glaring up at me with those same eyes as her sister’s. And then the blue in them softens and she says, “All this aside, Myles, I’m really pleased you’re okay and I’m glad you’re back at work. Beau said you’d mentioned moving, and I’m gonna be really selfish here and say I don’t want you to because we need you. All of us. You might not be blood but you’re family, and none of us—not even Sheridan—want to see you disappear.”
Fuck I think I’m crying again. “Thanks, Brin. I’m sorry I hurt you.”
Taking me completely by surprise, she wraps her arms around my waist. “I’ll break your testicles if you ever do it again.”
“I think that’s fair.”
She laughs and pulls away. “Start grovelling, Myles. My favourite flowers are tulips. And you already know Sheridan’s.”
Peonies, dahlias and carnations. I’m surprised I remember that.
“Noted.”
A second later she’s gone, and I’m left alone for all of thirty seconds before the first kid from my form group arrives.
“Oh,” she startles, offering a gentle smile, “welcome back, Mr. Wilson.”
* * *
SHERIDAN
I’m a bit lost.
I don’t know why I bothered getting out of the car when Brin texted to say she was going to be a while, but I didn’t want to sit in silence for half an hour, so I thought I’d try and find her classroom. Turns out I don’t actually know where that is, or where Mum’s office is, and so I’m aimlessly wandering the halls and reading the displays of the children’s works as I pass.
This is probably illegal. Or, not illegal, but definitely frowned upon. It’s after school hours but there are still students milling around the corridors and whispering when they think I’m out of earshot. Maybe now they’ll think Brin’s got an alter ego as someone with curly purple hair—I dyed it last week—and wears a lot of purple denim.
I turn a corner and find myself in the canteen, open plan with the hallway carrying on straight through the centre, kitchen on one side and rows of benches with plastic stools attached on the other. There’s a horrendous art display on the walls that I’m pretty sure is all vaginas.
“That can’t be legal,” I mutter.
“Woah,” a newly broken voice says from nearby.
I look towards the voice, finding a boy with a messy mop of hair and creased uniform staring straight at me.
I lift an awkward hand, “Hi.”
“Are you Sheridan, by any chance?” The boy asks.
“Yes…”
“I’m Sam.” He grins, and it all makes sense. This is Sam. Myles’s favourite pupil—the boy he wants to foster.
He holds out a hand, which I don’t hesitate to shake. “I’ve heard a lot about you, Sam,” I admit.
“I’ve heard a lot about you, too. And it makes sense.” This kid is practically glowing with excitement, and I have to say I find it oddly charming.
“What makes sense?”
“Why Mr. Wilson doesn’t shut up about you.”
“Myles talks to you about me?”
“All the time. And to be fair to him, if I had a girlfriend who looked like you, I wouldn’t stop talking about her, either.”
I have to laugh. This lad is going to make some girl very happy one day. “Thank you.”
“He really likes you, you know.” Sam suddenly grows serious, a crease appearing between his bushy brows. “He’s a twat for running off, but he likes you a lot all the same. Probably scared you’d abandon him for someone way cooler and better looking. Don’t get me wrong, he’s not ugly, but he was definitely punching with you.”
I’m in full on hysterics at this point. I can’t find it in myself to be sad at the topic of conversation because this boy is a delight. I want to foster him, too. “Thank you.”
“Seriously, you’re way too cool for Mr. Wilson.”
“Sam?” A painfully familiar and smooth voice calls from down the corridor.
I baulk and nearly make a run for it. I don’t know if I can see Myles now. Am I ready? Probably not. I’ll be a sad little mess by the time I find Brinsley and her classroom, which is apparently located in fucking Narnia.
“Sam?” His voice gets louder, and I get sweatier.
“Here!” He calls back.
And then Myles is there, dressed in green tweed trousers, a white shirt and brogues, with a grey wool coat over the top. His face is still a little battered but it’s cleaner than Nash’s. A couple more days and no one would know.
But beneath all the bruises and the cuts is my man. My man. I can’t deny that I’m still head over heels for him, even though he vanished. My head is at war with my heart. I want to forget everything that’s happened over the past month or so, but I also want to verbally rip him to shreds for the damage he did to my heart.
He’s gone very pale in the two seconds he’s been standing there. “Sheridan?”
I do my awkward wave again, “Hi.”
He looks at Sam, who is still smiling, either oblivious to the tension or just delighted by the reunion. “What did you do?”
“Nothing! I was just going to get my stuff like you asked and she was here. She’s way too cool for you, by the way.”
“I know she is.” He mutters, and I pretend not to hear it.
“I’m looking for Brin. I’ve never been inside before, and I got lost.”
“Oh,” is all he says to me. Then he starts jiggling around in his pockets and produces his car keys, holding them out to Sam as he comes closer, “Sam, can you go wait in the car, please?”
Oh no. I’m definitely not ready for whatever this is.
Sam’s gaze flits between us. “Are you getting back together?”
“Sam,”
“Right, not my business. Sorry.” He lifts his hands in surrender then turns that grin back on me. “Bye, Sheridan. He’s very sorry, by the way. Feels an utter fool.”
“Sam!”
“Alright, I’m going!”
He takes off down the corridor and we watch him go. I’m still smiling after him when I blurt, “You’re really good with him.”
Myles looks at me as if I’d spoken in a foreign language. Then he relaxes, “He’s important to me.”
“I know he is.”
He rubs the back of his neck which stirs the position of his coat and tightens the fabric of his shirt across his torso, highlighting the lines of his muscles, and my mouth starts watering. Jesus, how little does one girl need to be teased with before she turns into a thirsty bitch?
“I promised I’d take Sam home today, but are you free tonight? I’ll make us dinner. I feel like I owe you an explanation. An apology.”
My heart squeezes like it’s in a vice. “That depends, will you actually be there?”
He nods, “I deserve that. I promise I’ll be there.”
I let out a long breath. “Yeah, okay. I need to take Brin home and walk Hector, but I can come after.”
“Thank you. Whenever you can, I’ll be home all night.”
I nod once. “Okay.”