Chapter 6 #2
“You’ve never seen her use?” His gaze bears down on Bren. “Now is not the time to protect her. She’s hanging on by a thread and if you think hiding shit from me is good for her, you’re sadly a bigger part of the problem than I think.”
Bren glances at me. I subtly shake my head and remain silent.
I won’t lie to Mr. Hemings, but I’m not about to spill everything I know when I don’t have a clue what he intends to do with the information. He needs to tell me more about her state of mind before I’ll ever expose her secrets.
“Brendan, answer me!” Mr. Hemings slams his hand down on the table.
Bren jerks back. “She doesn’t do nearly as many drugs as other people I know. Shit, Dad. She’s practically a saint compared to most.”
“That wasn’t the question, Brendan.” His dad growls in growing frustration. “How long have you known and what does she take?”
Bren’s shoulders roll forward. “She likes to smoke weed sometimes. Well, that and drink. I think that’s all, and she’s only been doing it for maybe a year. Probably less.”
Mr. Hemings studies Bren. “So you know nothing about the cocaine or opioids?”
“You mean the painkillers? Ah…” Bren pauses, then races through his words. “She got those when she took that fall in the mountains and had terrible stomach pains. Remember, Mrs. Mayze took her to the doctor and they prescribed them to her then. I have no input about the coke.”
“Right.” Mr. Hemings takes a few deep breaths. “If that’s all you have for me, I’m going to ask you to go to your room. I have some things to discuss with Cash.”
“Yeah, sure.” Bren gets up and practically runs out of the room. He doesn’t even look back at me as he disappears up the stairs.
Fucking hell. I’m in this battle alone. I scrape my teeth over my lip and steel myself.
Mr. Hemings turns his tired gaze to me. “Let’s talk about the painkillers.”
“What about ’em?”
“She didn’t take a tumble in the mountains, did she?”
My heart thumps harder. “No, sir.”
“Thank you for being honest.” He relaxes a little. “Livianna keeps mumbling something about losing a boy. She keeps telling us you think it’s her fault. What do you know about that?”
“She hasn’t lost me. Maybe it’s someone else, but it’s not—”
“Cash, you’ve never lied to me before. Please don’t start now.”
My lungs deflate. “What are you asking me, sir?”
“The day you were all at the doctor’s office.” He pinches the bridge of his nose and squeezes his eyes shut. He takes a breath and then makes direct eye contact with me. “You told us she wasn’t pregnant. That it was just a scare.”
“I never told you that. Livianna did and she wasn’t when you asked her.”
“Your mother said it was a scare and all those media pictures and reports were altered to create a bigger story. Is that true?”
“My ma did tell you that.”
“Cash, you’re wearing on my patience.” He leans closer to me. “Let me be clear. Was Livianna ever pregnant?”
My head grows light and my pulse races. There’s no way I can get out of this without lying.
Bren said my pops saved Livianna by coming to me in a dream. I can’t betray my pops by going back on my promise to him, even if it means I expose our loss.
I swallow hard. “Yes, sir. She was.”
“For Christ’s sake, Cash. She had an abortion and none of you thought her parents should know about it. How was that even allowed? She was only fifteen.”
“She didn’t have an abortion. I don’t believe in it.”
He pulls back. “She miscarried?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Then why was she given painkillers?”
“Lily said it hurt a lot.” My chest aches. “She lost a lot of blood. It was bad, Mr. Hemings.”
“Were you there with her when it happened?”
“Yes, sir. My ma came over to help us because you were out of town. We were gonna tell you about the baby, but she lost it before we could.” I shift around in my chair. “Lily was really upset, so my ma told us she’d take care of everything for us.”
He lowers his head. “Jesus, Livianna’s been dealing with that all on her own.”
“I was there for her.” My stomach spins and my chest empties. “I have been there for her, but she acts like it doesn’t matter anymore.”
“You’ve been on the road since March.” He rises to his feet, shaking. “How could you possibly believe you’ve been there for her or that she’s over it?”
“It seemed like it meant more to me than it did to her.”
“That can’t be close to the truth.”
“It is. She told me she thought it was for the best.”
“What was for the best?”
“That she miscarried.”
“Cash, you’re a young man, so I’m trying to give you some leniency, but she lost her baby.” He trudges over to the island. “How do you not recognize how painful that is for her?”
“It might be, but if it is, I wouldn’t know because she doesn’t talk about it with me.” I get up and trek to him so he can see my sincerity. “Sometimes I feel like it’s harder for me. I got a tattoo on my back to show her he would always be with us and she didn’t even care.”
“What?”
I pull my shirt off and show him my shoulder. “The bow over the door is a symbol of him. I told her that he was watching over us, and her only response was to tease me about thinking it was a boy. She dropped it after that and never mentioned it again.”
He scrolls over the artwork etched in my skin and releases a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, Cash. I didn’t consider how this would be affecting you.”
“You don’t need to apologize to me.” I work my shirt back on. “I love her, Mr. Hemings, and I plan on marrying her.”
“Cash, don’t say things like—”
“No. You’re asking me for the truth and here it is. I know we’re young, but we belong together. We were meant to have that baby. We’re supposed to share that with one another.”
“That leads me to the next thing I wanted to discuss.” His gaze softens like he’s getting ready to tell me terrible news. “Doctor’s orders are explicit: low stimulation, no triggers, and no cameras. Whether you like it or not, you’re all three.”
“Meaning?”
“Livianna needs to heal. Lorna and I think it’s best if you two take a break.”
My heart cracks and my stomach goes into a free fall. “Are you saying I’m no longer allowed to be around her?”