13. Chapter 8 #2
Hannah leaned back, staring at the gray sky. "Brunner’s a jerk, but that doesn’t mean you can’t handle today," she said. "I mean, we’re in our junior year. If you’re not already on the verge of a breakdown, you’re doing something wrong."
Evin felt a knot tighten in her stomach.
The conversation felt too familiar, the weight on her shoulders too heavy.
She knew she’d have to stand in front of the class soon, and the thought alone made her throat close up.
But it was n’t just the presentation—it was everything.
Bas, school, the constant pressure pressing down on her, making her feel like she was never enough.
"I don’t know…" she began hesitantly, her voice barely above a whisper. "Do you ever feel like… like everything’s just too much?"
Hannah and Milka exchanged a glance. Finally, Hannah gave a slow nod. "Yeah, Evin. Trust me, everyone here is under pressure."
Evin's gaze drifted to Bas, who was still standing with his friends, laughing without a care in the world.
"And after this weekend, is it any surprise you’re doubting yourself more?" Milka added.
Evin barely registered their words. Her thoughts began to drift, slipping away from the moment. Back to Bas. Back to a memory she couldn’t shake. Her mind had already started pulling her back—to a specific time, a different version of Bas.
A scene from years ago, when they were both fifteen.
__________
It had been one of those school events, a Christmas concert organized for the parents.
Bas had been chosen as one of the main speakers to deliver the class speech.
The auditorium was packed, buzzing with chatter.
On his way to the stage, Bas had been joking around with Viktor and the others, his laughter echoing above the hum of the crowd.
When he finally stood on the stage, microphone in hand, he looked out over the sea of faces. He had never been the type to care for these kinds of events, but somehow, he always ended up in the spotlight. Bas grinned, spinning the microphone in his hand like he owned the room.
"Don’t strain yourself too much, Thomas," he quipped, glancing at the pianist fumbling with sheet music. "Otherwise, I’ll have to take over as the solo act."
His voice carried that signature Bas confidence—arrogant but magnetic. The boys in the audience laughed loudly, and even some of the kids in the crowd chuckled along .
But then, Bas’s gaze swept across the audience.
The stage lights made it hard to see past the first few rows, but something in his expression flickered—an almost imperceptible hesitation. A crack in the usual bravado that Evin only now, years later, recognized as significant.
The auditorium erupted into applause as Bas wrapped up his speech and stepped off the stage. His delivery had been flawless—confident, clear, and dripping with charisma.
Evin couldn’t help but admire him, albeit silently.
Later, she had perched herself on the desk in their classroom afterward, waiting. Nervously.
"Well, Mr. Keynote Speaker," Evin teased with a smirk as he entered, closing the door behind him. "Got yourself a fan club now?"
Bas chuckled, stepping closer, his gaze playful yet intense. "If you’re the president, then yeah."
She laughed, feeling her cheeks flush. Their eyes met, and the air between them thickened, buzzing with something new, something unspoken. It was the first time they’d truly been alone—without friends or teachers hovering nearby.
Bas moved even closer, so close that Evin could feel his breath, warm against her skin. Her heartbeat quickened, every second stretching into an eternity.
"Guess you’ve earned yourself an award for that performance," Evin joked, her voice softer now.
His fingers brushed against her cheek gently, and the lightest touch sent an electric tingle through her. "I’m about to collect it," he whispered, his voice low and unsteady.
Then, his lips met hers. The first kiss.
It was shy and tentative, yet the tension between them was palpable, like a spark waiting to ignite into flames.
Evin felt her knees weaken, her hands instinctively clutching Bass's shirt, gripping the fabric as though it was the only thing keeping her grounded in reality.
Heat coursed through her body, and though the kiss started tentative, it deepened, an unspoken bond igniting between them .
Everything around her blurred into insignificance.
As she recalled the moment, Evin pressed her fingers to her lips.
Then, suddenly, the door burst open. They broke apart, startled, and before Evin could process what was happening, a tall figure filled the doorway.
“Dad!”
It was Bas's father. His tanned, angular face caught the light for a second—just enough to reveal the sharp gaze and steady posture of a man used to being in control.
His gaze was cold, his stance rigid as he stared at the two of them.
Evin had never seen him before.
“Evin, leave us,” he said, his voice sharp and cutting, as if Evin was nothing more than an annoying inconvenience.
Confused and nervous, Evin glanced at Bas, but he only gave her a fleeting, almost apologetic nod.
She had to go.
Without another word, she slipped past the man and out of the classroom, shutting the door behind her. She didn’t go far, curiosity and unease compelled her to wait nearby, where she could hear everything.
The silence was heavy until the sharp, cutting tone of Bas’s father broke through.
“What do you think you’re doing, Sebastian? First pathetic performance on stage—you embarrassed us—and now this girl?”
Evin held her breath.
The tension in his voice made her pulse race.
She couldn’t make out Bas’s reply, but before she could dwell on it…
A sharp slap rang through the air. Her heart stopped.
Instinctively, she darted into an adjacent room.
“Now pull yourself together, damn it!” The words rang out as the door slammed open.
Her eyes were still wide with shock.
She covered her mouth with her hands to muffle her breathing. Her breaths came shallow, and she didn’t dare move.
__________
The memory pounded in her head as vividly as if she had just stepped out of that silent classroom where Bas’s father had broken him—who knew how many times before?
It was the first time she had seen the truth—not the confident boy everyone thought they knew, but the hurt, exhausted Bas who hid behind walls of sarcasm and coldness. It was this glimpse behind the facade that had captivated her.
This boy, far from perfect, who constantly lost himself but tried to reveal his true self to her. In the fleeting moments when they were alone, and that was the Bas who had stolen her heart.
The Bas who, in the end, had shattered it just as easily.
“Evin, hey?” Milka’s voice abruptly pierced the darkness of her thoughts, pulling her mercilessly back to the present. Milka gave her a questioning look, as if she could see the silence hanging between them.
Evin forced a faint smile, her throat tight. “Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just going over the presentation,” she said softly, the words echoing faintly as though they still reverberated from the depths of her memories.
“Don’t overthink it, everything will be fine,” Milka said, gripping Evin’s shoulders gently and giving her a reassuring shake.