28
TATE
My heavy gaze drills into Ezla as her breathing evens out and every muscle in her body falls completely lax.
Fucking hell, she’s mine.
And she’s fallen asleep on me.
On me.
The moment is so unbearably perfect, I feel like I might pass out.
I mean, that also might be from all the previous sensations and the aftershocks that are still working their way through me, but my point still stands.
The sound of water hitting taalk fills the room, and I lazily flick my eyes over to the open doorway showcasing the bathroom.
Cooper moves around in there, heading over to the cupboard under the sink to look through the huge chunk of bath bits and bobs like those salts and bath bombs and shit. I grunt out, “Make sure it’s hot cinnamon.”
Rolling his eyes, he glances over at me from where he’s crouched down. “No fucking shit.”
Scoffing quietly, I internally flip him off.
Not gonna lie, Cooper might’ve been my least favourite for a while.
But Havoc’s a miracle worker, because by the end of our little .
. . adventure—fuck, I really can’t be getting hard again; I think, for once, I’ve actually been knocked out for good—I hardly felt any bitterness towards him.
I mean, he was pleasing her, I was pleasing her, and Havoc’s overall pleasure seemed almost double the fucking usual, so what do I really have to complain about there?
I think with him, I’ve mostly held on to my fury over what he said to me in earlier days—he’d told me Havoc wouldn’t ever love me, and that fucking hurt.
She’s all I want, my reason for living, so when he said that .
. . I’ve never been so open about it, so it’s been more of a quiet anger simmering beneath the surface, because I didn’t want anyone seeing how much the fucker’s words stuck with me .
. . But yeah, that fucking stung like a bitch. Killed, to be exact.
Cooper does that sometimes, tosses his own insecurities out on others, and that one’s haunted me for a bit.
Because, for a moment, I’d doubted myself.
Doubted whether Havoc could really love me.
It was only a brief moment, but it was a moment I’d never had before and one that I shouldn’t have had when I’ve always been so certain of mine and Ezla’s future together.
I’ve always known she’d love me eventually, and now I know that she fucking does. She just has to admit it.
“I’m sorry.”
I jolt, instinctively hugging Havoc closer to me, eyes snapping up to the fuckface in question. As I said, the anger has definitely died down, but still . . .
“What?” I grunt, narrowing my stare.
“About what I said. I haven’t thought about it much, honestly, and I think that’s even shittier.”
“You in my fucking head?” I eye him suspiciously.
He snorts. “Seriously? I’m not Ezla.”
“I can see that.” Cooper’s gifted a wrinkled nose from me.
He appears unimpressed.
Sighing, he scrubs a hand over his stubble.
“Look, I just . . . I was just reminded. I know we butt heads more than the others, and I think that’s just our personalities clashing.
But with Ezla’s . . . feelings through the bond, I was just reminded of what I said about .
. . her not ever having those for you. And I don’t think I ever took the time to say a true apology, so . . .”
“So . . . ? Come on, dickface, I’m waiting.” This is actually quite amusing.
He scowls mightily. “Seriously? I’m trying to be nice here.”
I shrug and bury my face in Havoc’s silky hair, inhaling her.
Huffing like a toddler, Cooper murmurs, “I am sorry. That was just my insecurity speaking. I know that, and it’s even clearer now.”
Flicking my eyes back up to him for a short period, I say quietly so as to not wake our girl up, “Apology accepted.”
His brows shoot up.
“What? Havoc doesn’t like when we fight. And it’s not like we fight over everything—we’re just usually the stars in the ones that do break out.”
“Fair.”
“But you’re still my least favourite.”
He barks out a laugh. “Yeah, fuck you too.”
Lips twitching, I turn my full attention back on Havoc. Nose nuzzling into her head, I soak her up, letting out a groan of contentment.
A few beats pass before Cooper asks quietly, “Do you want to move her? Or should we wake her?”
I shoot him a slitted side-eye, rethinking my decision to forgive him.
He raises his hands up by his head. “Sorry. Just a suggestion.”
“Shit suggestion. You don’t just wake Havoc up. She’ll open her mesmerising eyes when she’s damn well good and ready.”
He blows out a breath but nods like he gets it. He’s really not all bad. “Right. Pick her up gently, then, and we’ll get her to the tub.”
I hear his footsteps retreating, and I carefully push Havoc’s hair away from her neck, possessiveness and adoration sluicing through me as I take in the dark marks I’ve left now that we don’t have to worry about him seeing them.
I’ll fucking shove the fact that Havoc belongs to me in his face every chance I get from now on. What’s he gonna do about it?
Shifting cautiously, I gently slide my arm not around her upper half behind her legs. I freeze, heart jumping when she lets out a soft sound, then carry on with a sigh of relief when she only nuzzles into me in her sleep.
That previous possessiveness and adoration are now fucking roaring.
“Fuck yeah, I love you too, Havoc,” I rumble lowly, pressing a firm but gentle kiss to her forehead as I lift her from our bed.
Turning around, I catch Cooper watching us intently from the bathroom, and I flick my eyes to the now-full glinting onyx tub beside him as I head over with slow steps so I don’t jostle Ezla.
Honestly, I feel like if me and Cooper didn’t do such a good job of fucking the energy right out of her, she’d be awake at the slightest sound.
The only times we’ve seen her asleep are when she’s been out cold, and once when she was trapped in the darkness of her mind, a horrific memory that still haunts me.
A satisfied grunt leaves me as I step into the bathroom and inhale the hot cinnamon swirling all around me.
Steam curls up into the air, the temperature rising the closer I get to the huge bathtub on the right-hand side of the room; the mammoth shower takes up the left side, while a large mirror with a sink and the cupboard beneath sits up against the wall in the middle, almost directly in line with the open doorway.
On my way, I catch sight of my own neck, and a delighted grin breaks out on my face as I take in the red teeth indentations.
They should last for a day at least, but I’ll have to ask Havoc to start biting me daily, because I want this mark to stay forever.
Now there’s an idea . . .
Eagerness thrumming through my bloodstream, I keep Ezla in my arms as I step into the scented hot water. Sitting down, it rises to just below my chest, and I let out a quiet groan as I reposition my girl so that her perfect ass is sat snugly in my lap.
My dick’s risen to full attention again, but I ignore it, more interested in the simple act of hugging Havoc to me at the moment. Gently setting her head back on my chest, I spare a quick glance at Cooper. “What did you put in here?”
He shrugs. “Dunno. Just whatever was labelled hot cinnamon.”
I snort. That was actually Scotty’s doing, one of the only things he did do other than burn himself out trying to keep everyone intact in the first few days following the Halfway Ball.
Not sure who he actually asked, probably just a random Neutral staff, but a load of hot-cinnamon scented shit arrived in a posh-as-hell black box through the dumbwaiter in the dining room that same day.
At the time, I couldn’t really focus on it too much with the fucking agony taking over every thought, every part of my being—I just wanted her, not only a small piece of her.
Now, however, I get to bathe in it and truly appreciate the fact we now have Havoc’s signature scent on hand at all times.
Cooper asks, “Do you want a bath scrunchie?”
Scoffing, I don’t bother to reply as I run my palm over the sinful little body in my arms, keeping one arm securely around Havoc’s middle as I rub my cheek against the top of her head.
“I’ll take that as a no.” The muttered words are followed by, “Shower gel? Foam?” I hear Cooper rummaging through the cupboard again. “Cream?”
Brows furrowing, I pay even closer attention to that silky skin beneath my fingers. “Fuck, I don’t know. Cream? Her skin’s so fucking soft,” I groan.
“So cream, right?”
I think for a moment. “But what if it’s naturally buttery soft and we use the wrong one?”
Bitching under his breath, Cooper raises his voice when he says, “Does it really fucking matter? I honestly don’t think HC’s the type to care what she washes herself with. I don’t think that’s a bloody priority in her life.”
A hand lifts from the water to flip him off over my shoulder.
“Fuck’s sake, Tate. Fine, we’re doing the shower cream. If she does wake up pissed about it, you can blame me.”
“That won’t matter once we’ve used the wrong one,” I grumble, hand back under the water and on my Havoc.
I can feel how unimpressed Cooper is, but he doesn’t say anything, only comes over with some hot-cinnamon scented shower cream. Squinting at it, I take it from him before popping the cap open with my teeth. Then I tip the bottle upside down and dump a generous amount on my palm.
All the while, Cooper stands there watching me like an idiot.
“The fuck are you doing?” I grunt without looking at him, placing the bottle on the side of the tub.
He sighs heavily. “Debating if I should get in or go have a shower.”
Slowly, I slide a glare his way. “And why the fuck would you do that when our stunning Bonded is right fucking here?”
Cooper looks at me like I’ve grown three heads. “Are you really asking me that right now? I know you’ve been better with your jealousy, but come on, Tate.”