43 #5
I always love it in here, and I try not to pry even though I want to know every single part of my Havoc inside and out, but with the stress she’s in so often lately, all the pain and rage and confusion and every other possible emotion in here swirling around each other with no order whatsoever, the severe struggle in her is clear, and even I find it hard to bear the weight of it for just these moments as I look around.
But I’d carry anything for my Bonded without her having to ask, and more than that, I’m happy to say that she’s happy overall.
When she struggles, she struggles hard, but those moments aren’t all the time.
And with time and with the progress she’s made and continues to make, like right now when she’s asking us for help, just like Cooper asked of her after what’s probably the most fear any of us have ever felt when we found the woman we love moments from ending it all in that bathroom .
. . I know she’ll feel good almost all the time.
I know that when this is over, when we’ve finally got these last few things out of the way, she’ll reach that point. She’s already so close.
“You do, Love,” Scotty is the first to murmur softly, stroking a hand over her hair. “You’re on the edge, but you want us to look with you.”
Cooper says lowly, “We’ll stay right here while you do, Vengeance.”
Taking a deep breath, a mask comes over her face in the next second.
I want to shove it off, but I know Ezla needs it to help her through this as she says, “I will check all of these apps, but I will focus on the camera roll today as we must now visit the Avri labs to disable these hidden cameras. I would rather get that out of the way as soon as possible.”
“Of course, Love.”
And after Scotty’s words and without another of her own, Ezla closes the surveillance app, swipes her thumb across the screen, and locates the photo app.
My heart’s pounding out a rapid beat until it stops abruptly along with my lungs when she clicks on it and pictures upon pictures of bare skin flood the screen.
Someone makes a strangled sound, but I have no idea who.
I’m not sure if I’m feeling everything or feeling so much that I can’t feel anything at all at this particular moment as Ezla’s unsteady finger silently moves over the screen again, scrolling through all the thumbnails.
Hundreds of them.
When I finally remember to breathe, my harsh, ragged pants mix into those of my brothers’ and our Bonded’s, and my grip on her turns crushing as she just keeps on scrolling.
Cooper scrubs a shaking palm harshly over his jaw, and I can hear the rough scrape of his stubble across his glove.
His voice is no more steady even though he tries extremely hard for Ezla’s sake to remain composed and not let his raving-mad anger get the best of him.
“Do you want to start deleting them? Let us know if you need one of us to do it for you.”
Silently, as if in a trance, she only keeps scrolling.
And scrolling.
And scrolling.
Alby shift uneasily. Sniffling, he quickly wipes under his reddened eyes while all of us exchange apprehensive glances, each mirroring what’s wrecking me apart from the inside out—the indescribable anguish, horror, fury, and the disgust that’s only ever aimed at that fucking sick and twisted monster.
“Ezzy . . . ?” Tiger rasps.
No response.
More scrolling.
Another beat.
“E-Ezla?” Alby chokes out this time, hesitantly reaching out to curl his fingers around her upper arm.
Silence.
More scrolli—
Cooper snatches the phone from her hand.
Face like thunder, chest heaving, his thumbs punch at the screen aggressively.
Ezla doesn’t even react.
Without a word, Scotty pulls her into his arms, and I stay close to her back to offer as much support as I can, but I don’t try to draw her back into me. Scotty’s best at this, and he’s always able to help her the most and knows the right things to say in these situations.
“You’re so fucking strong, Ezla. So strong,” he whispers, and there’s tears in his eyes, but he holds them back as his hand rubs up and down her back, the other smoothing over her head.
“No one can hurt you, Love—you make sure of that. And you have five men who would gladly walk through hell with you to reinforce that too, even if you don’t need us to. ”
The air is thick and heavy enough to be suffocating, and I can’t find the words like he can, so I remain a steady presence at her back, sending her all my love and devotion through the bond, my desire to slay all her demons and peel the skin from anyone who dares to even think about looking at her the wrong way.
I feel the others doing the same, though majorly in a less violent way.
Finally, Cooper lets out a hitched breath.
I tense further.
Swallowing thickly, eyes still coated in a layer of moisture that’s more obvious now, he looks up. “It’s done. I’ve deleted them all and then again on the—
Sharp pain slices into me in time with Havoc’s pained gasp as she abruptly pulls her face away from Scotty’s chest.
A tear of blood drips from her blackish-crimson eye.