Chapter 40
CHAPTER FORTY
BEFORE
The cool breeze brushed through her hair as she lay beneath her favorite oak tree. A hand softly explored every curve of her body from behind. That hardworking hand that belonged to the man she had come to love.
Dolion.
He rarely kept his hands to himself anymore. She found herself craving his touch the nights she couldn’t get to him, the nights she lay awake in bed counting the hours until they could meet again.
Her legs had already been toned from riding. Training with Adriel had created more muscle in her thighs. She could tell Dolion noticed when his touch hovered there over the fabric of her dress. As his hand migrated upward, he began twirling a thin tendril of her hair between his fingertips.
His heart was pounding at her back, making her own pulse quicken.
His fingers coaxed a shiver from her that traveled from the back of her neck to her tailbone.
She felt his freshly shaved cheek rest in the crook of her neck.
His hand came forward, cupping her waist and pulling her taut along his body.
It had been increasingly difficult to get to him in recent months.
She risked it every couple of weeks, if that.
Since Adriel told her of the curse, he had increased the guard stations outside Oakmire.
Laurelai had grown tired of being her body double long ago.
She still complied when asked, but it made Helaina feel guilty to use her like that.
She had to savor this, because now more than ever someone could catch them and her fantasy would end. So she sank into Dolion, breathing him in.
“Will you marry me one day?” His whispered question shot her straight out of his hold.
“Don’t joke about that.”
“I would never,” he began softly. “I wasn’t . . .” He trailed off, looking nearly defeated.
“What?” Her cheeks heated.
He smiled, seeming to notice the blooming pink there. “Would you leave Keles? Leave all of this behind and just go . . . with me?”
She turned away from him, devastated she couldn’t say yes. “I can’t. You know I can’t.”
“Why? Why can’t you leave?”
They had had this conversation before. He had never been satisfied with her vague explanations. Just as her family had been secretive with her, she was now keeping this one big part of her life from Dolion. It didn’t seem right.
“I’m a princess, I can’t—”
“You say Krysta will be wed soon, she’ll leave. Why must you stay?”
She wrapped her arms around her stomach, refusing to look at him. “They would never let us marry, Dolion, it’s not how things work here.”
“Why do you have to follow anything they say? They control everything about you, it’s infuriating.”
“I can’t leave, I’m sorry.”
“You’re sorry?” he said, clearly growing frustrated. “The least you could do is tell me why.”
Would it chase him away to know? Would he be petrified of her? She had seen the fearful looks of her family when they had witnessed her magic.
“If I tell you . . . you’ll leave.” She tried to blink away the brewing tears that welled at the thought of losing him—losing this one piece of happiness.
“Have I not proved myself to you? Hours of waiting past sunset, sneaking past guards. Do you know what your father could do if he caught me? Men have been hanged for much less. I haven’t asked you for anything in return until now.”
A sourness settled in her stomach.
“Look at you. You’re a caged animal to them. I offer you freedom and you turn me away.”
He moved closer. Taking her chin between his fingers, he forced her gaze to meet his own. “Let me free you, Helaina. Let go of this place . . . Come with me.”
An animal.
Caged.
Alone.
He was right. Although she loved her family more than words could ever say . . . this was it for her—these fields, these walls. As long as she lived, she would be a threat, and others a threat to her.
“I don’t know why they keep you hidden, why they keep you shackled to this place. There is so much more to the world.” Her eyes began to well. “I want to experience it with you. Do you not want the same?”
She did. It was a fantastic dream of hers, to marry him and travel the world together. To actually live, to see the things she read about. She wanted that, she wanted a life with him, away from this place.
She took a steady breath. And then she told him everything. The prophecy, the curse, the time she spent training with Adriel. She even told him what she knew of the fae queen, and the wounded scout they couldn’t save.
He stared at her, not balking. He didn’t look at her like she was crazy or some sort of witch. He listened to her explanation intently as it fell from her lips.
Salty streaks made watery paths down her face. He pulled her close and pressed the softest kiss to her chin.
“I can protect you. All you have to do is say yes. Come with me?”
Her breath hitched as his lips touched her cheek. She was sure he tasted her tears.
“Please, Helaina,” he whispered, continuing to pepper kisses on her collarbone.
She closed her eyes, casting one final teardrop past her lashes. She didn’t understand what she’d done to gain his trust and understanding. She was just grateful that he hadn’t fled.
“I’ll only go . . . if you keep kissing me . . . only if you keep touching me.” She tried to sound confident. “Please.” It was her turn to beg.
Dolion’s eyes roamed every part of her exposed skin. He guided a finger along the hem of her gown. Then he brought his lips to her neck.
“Like this?” he whispered. Her skin pebbled at his every caress.
“Yes, more. I want you to be my first.”
He groaned, his gaze fixed on her skin.
“As tempting as you are, I want to save that for our wedding night.” His voice became low and mischievous as his lips ran over her shoulders. “But there are other things we can do.”
“Show me.” She wanted him to touch every inch of her, to leave no trace of her skin unexplored.
His smoldering eyes found hers. His hand glided from her chest to the back of her head as he pulled her close, claiming her lips fully.
She was lost in it—lost in him.
He broke contact to remove his shirt, and four breathy words left her lips.
“I love you, Dolion.”
He leaned in close, his bare chest warming her front. “I love you.”
No other words were spoken. Their bodies explored each other for the first time in a frenzy of lust and wanting.
Finally she had hope for her future. Soon, her new life would begin.