Chapter 42 #2
“Stop blaming yourself for lives that are lost. Stop mourning those that wouldn’t fight to keep you.
” His thumb traveled to that pillow-soft bottom lip of hers, feeling her warm breath pass over his skin.
“I would carve out anyone’s heart if they tried to take you.
If you went missing tomorrow, I would only need to give the command, and not a single Divine would sleep until you were found, until we brought you home. ”
She looked up at him, confused, yet there was yearning there. He hadn’t seen a single tear from her since they met. Maybe she was too broken to cry. Maybe she was just as fractured as he was, as he had always been.
“No vast space, void, or army could keep me from hunting you down and slaughtering those who stood in my way.” Anger brewed in his core at the thought.
It dissipated as he sank further into the feel of her skin.
“Now that I’ve known you, I fear you have gained a shadow in me, Helaina Ironblood.
There is nowhere you could go that I won’t follow. ”
She brought her blood-tinged hands to his forearms. Her delicate fingers swiped across the coarse hairs there, as if she was assuring herself he was real. Her touch was magnetic, drawing him toward her.
“Why are you saying these things? You’ve shown me nothing but cruelty since I got here.”
“I pushed you, Helaina, and I will continue to push you. The way I approach things has never been . . . delicate. I refuse to coddle you, to let you sink back into that place we found you in. You’ve been hidden and told to listen and obey for too fucking long.
I wanted you to see that you didn’t have to be a victim of your circumstances anymore.
I wanted you to choose to see what I saw in you.
To be what I saw in you. You don’t need shielding or protection or safety, you never did. ”
She roamed her eyes over his pectorals, then his shoulders, while she ran her fingers up and down his toned arms. He quivered, he physically shook from her intimate caresses.
“That’s not entirely true.” She continued the motions of her hands. “You’ve stepped in to protect me a couple of times.”
He laughed, actually laughed. “Once the bone dagger claims your mortal life, I won’t have to step in when beasts are seconds from devouring you or cooking you alive. Once you’re one of us, you’ll be unstoppable.”
She stopped her tantalizing touches. She took a good look at her hands for the first time.
“I . . . I need . . .” Her breaths grew frantic, the shock returning to her face.
“Let me take care of you.”
He picked her up and carried her to his copper tub. She looked so small as he laid her inside the shining metal.
He ran the water until the warmth enveloped her skin.
He took a cloth and didn’t hesitate to start washing her, taking his time with each leg, then her arms, her stomach.
When the water turned an opaque red, he drained it and began the process again.
He cupped handfuls from the tub, dropping streams down her long locks, combing his fingers through the soaked strands to remove any caked-on debris.
She moaned, a sound of satisfaction that went straight to his core.
“That feels amazing.”
She shivered, clearly enjoying the experience. Every one of Helaina’s muscles eased.
He was equally relaxed. He didn’t have to worry about losing control with her, or injecting his personal brand of fear into her heart.
She carried that strange protection of hers.
Placing his bare hands upon her was complete and total bliss.
That dark power that plagued his life couldn’t find her.
To this single soul, he wasn’t a threat.
He allowed the bath to fill again with clean water. As he stood, he began tearing off pieces of his own clothing. He paused, taking in her nearly naked body. She had scars, both outside and in—so did he.
“Helaina,” he said like a prayer, feeling bolder than he probably should.
When she turned, he could have sworn he saw a flicker of trust there. He continued to undress, smelling her arousal. There was so much to discuss, so much ahead of them, yet all he could see was this opportunity before him.
“Can I join you?”
That sweet scent of hers grew stronger with his question. A cocktail of desire, nervousness, and excitement.
“If I say no? If I asked you to leave me?” Her hands squeezed the sides of the tub in anticipation of his next move.
There was such longing in his eyes, and he let her see all of it. “I’ve lived too long to pursue someone who doesn’t share my desires. If you command it, I will walk out that door.”
He waited, but the command didn’t come. She shifted her legs, crossing them tightly.
“Is that what you want . . . little hellion? For me to leave you?”
“No.” She began torturing her lower lip with her teeth, the action making his mind a puddle. “Why do you call me that? Little hellion?”
He dared a step forward. “Because you’ve been unruly and troublesome since the moment I found you.”
Her fidgeting continued, her fingers making their way between her teeth.
“You’ve also been . . . surprisingly captivating. I can’t stop wanting you.” His admission was a deep rumble.
He could tell it surprised her. “Is this what you say to all the new recruits?”
“If you’re asking if I’ve been with others, the answer is yes.
” He bent down to lower his pants to the floor.
Her breathing paused. “The way I have thought of you every second since I discovered you, the way I want to touch you the moment you walk into a room . . . that has happened with no one else. For that, you are the first.” It was another vulnerable admission, but he wanted her to know.
“Can I join you?” he asked again, softer this time.
She met his gaze. “Yes.” He’d never heard a sweeter word.
His hard body slid in behind her, his chest flush with her back. The water rippled around them in waves and finally settled as he found comfort. Their hearts pounded almost in sync.
“I have wanted to touch you.” He let his hands glide down her pebbling skin. “I have wanted to breathe you in.” He reached for the band of cloth around her breasts and pulled it over her head, flinging it onto the ground behind him. Her nipples hardened instantly with their newfound freedom.
“I have wanted to taste you.” He smoothed his lips across her shoulder as she shuddered.
He allowed his teeth to graze over the softest neck he had ever encountered. His lips touched right where her pulse was bounding, just below the angle of her jaw.
“Do you still wish to escape this place? To run from me again?”
“No,” she replied with surprising confidence.
His excitement grew at her response, at the view of her full breasts, at the noises he was coaxing from her. His hard length rested beneath her ass as she let her body melt onto his.
“Say you don’t feel the same way, and I’ll stop.” He pulled her chin to the side, giving himself access to her earlobe, lapping and biting the softness there. “Or . . . tell me I can have you, and I will spend this day atoning for my cruelty.” He bit down on the flesh of her neck again.
“Theo,” she breathed out.
He growled at that, leaning his hips upward so she could feel his size. “Say it again, my little hellion. Say my name.”
He moved his teeth down to the sensitive part of her shoulder as she gasped.
“Theo!” she called out in pleasure. She clasped her hand over her face to stifle her own sound.
“Are you worried someone will hear you?” he teased, bringing his hands to her bare stomach. He let the tips of his fingers glide upward to fully cup her breasts. He felt her reach up, attempting to cover that damned brand. He pushed her hand away, making room for him to explore.
“Never cover yourself in front of me. I want to see all of you,” he groaned.
“It’s ugly. All these scars are,” she murmured.
He didn’t give a damn about them. The slight divots in her leg from the ebros, the vertical slash from the hound. He would make her reveal the story of that burn one day, and make whoever did it suffer. Now was not the time.
“There is not a single piece of you that lacks beauty,” he rasped. He lightly massaged the hard-peaked centers of her nipples between his thumbs and forefingers. She arched her back up into his grip.
“Do you like this?”
She nodded feverishly, still keeping her mouth covered as she moaned through her fingers.
He licked the edge of her ear as he continued pulling the most addictive sounds from her throat. Sounds she was covering with that damned hand, sounds that belonged to him.
“If you want me, I need to hear you. I need to hear you let go for me,” his throaty voice ordered.
She kept her hand firm atop her lips.
He showed her he wasn’t bluffing, and stopped. She tried arching into him again, begging him to continue, but he remained still. She groaned in frustration.
“Fuck it, fine.” She let her frustration show as she slammed her hand into the warmth of the bath.
“I like you with a foul mouth. Now let me hear your pleasure.”
His motions continued, and she did exactly as he instructed. He flashed her a mischievous smile as his mismatched eyes flared with possession.
“That’s my good girl.”