Chapter 32 #2
“Doctor Phillips. Could you give us a moment please?” He asks and I hear her shuffle around on her seat to stand up.
“Absolutely, please take all the time you need, I’ll just be outside.
” She pushes the chair away and slips through the curtains, leaving me and Dean alone.
Releasing Dean’s hand, I lift my legs and wrap my arms around myself, tucking my knees under my chin.
Even fully dressed I feel so exposed. So open and raw.
Dean stands up in my periphery and I’ve already convinced myself that he’s going to leave. He’s heard enough and it’s too much for him. He’s disgusted in me, I know he is.
A split second passes and the bed dips at the side of me. “Make some room, pretty girl.” Lifting my head from my knees, my brows creased.
“What are you doing? I thought you were leaving?” I ask, still confused as to why he’s still here.
He pushes me further into the bed before sliding in at the side of me, his body taking up every available space on the single mattress.
I instantly feel the heat of his firm body, not an inch of space between us.
He pulls my knees free from the confines of my arms till they’re outstretched in front of me before wrapping his toned arm around my back, pulling me into his solid chest, the side of my face resting in the crook of his arm.
I freeze immediately and wait for him to tell me softly that he doesn’t want to stay, but that never comes.
“I’m not going anywhere, Ana. I told you this and I will keep telling you this until you believe me.
Nothing that you say or do can make me walk away from this, away from you.
” I feel the vibrations of his deep voice through his chest as he laces his fingers through mine.
His warm skin tone stark against my pale shade.
“You have no idea how fucking proud I am of you. You opened yourself up right there in front of me and I’ve never been more in awe of someone in my life.
” Tears fell freely at his words and I let them, feeling myself falling deeper into his sanctuary, to a place where nothing bad can ever touch me again.
The roughness of his beard coasts against my forehead, his soft lips planting a small kiss there.
“Rest now pretty girl, I’ll be here when you wake up.” I let my body go heavy against him, knowing he’ll keep me secure as I allow my eyelids to fall closed. Exhaustion taking me under.
I’m groggy as I wake, the bright white light from the ceiling of the small cubicle pierces through my eyes causing me to wince, tucking my face further into a mass of muscle.
Dean’s still here like he said he would be. A warmth rushes through me knowing that he stayed, even when I bared myself completely to him.
“I seem to be making a habit of falling asleep around you.” I croak out. A rich laugh fills my ears, it’s a sound that I want to hear all of the time.
“Are you tryna’ say that I’m boring?” Dean teases and I feel my face flush.
“I wouldn’t use the word boring to describe you.
” I say, a hint of shyness filtering through my voice.
He turns on his side to face me, the solid planes of his chest now in my eyeline, he places his fingers under my chin and tilts my head back to look up at him, the radiant green of his eyes burn into me, flecks of brown and hazel speckle through his irises and I find myself getting completely lost in them.
Years worth of stories are written all across his face and I itch to read them, to dive underneath his skin and make a home there.
My own thoughts take me by surprise and that tiny flick of guilt tries to creep its way in but I do everything in my power to throw it out.
To block it from coming in. I’m beginning to have feelings for Dean and if I’m being truly honest with myself, I don’t want to stop it.
One half of me is trying to convince my brain that I don’t deserve this, that I don’t deserve to have someone to want me, that I don’t deserve to feel the way I do about someone other than my husband who I know now, probably never loved me.
And if he did, it wasn’t the love that I wanted.
No, his version of love was toxic, a venom that ran through my bloodstream, killing me slowly from the inside out.
I break from my trance, the eyelids fluttering to clear the haze. The pad of Dean’s thumb brushes against my chin, the motion soothing me.
“And what word would you use to describe me, hm?” He questions.
“Let me think. Caring. Thoughtful. Strong. Funny.. Handsome.” The words leave my mouth faster than I can catch them.
His nostrils flare, the lines between his strong brows crease and I fear I’ve taken this too far.
Dean’s burning gaze roams over my face before stopping at my lips, the pad of his thumb skims across the inside of my lower lip, the rough skin whispering over my bottom teeth, and I run my tongue over the tip of his thumb without even thinking, tasting his rich skin.
He groans a deliciously deep sound from his throat as I continue to taste him, his breathing begins to pick up as I open my mouth further for him, allowing him the access I know we both want.
Dean takes the opportunity to slide his thumb into my warm mouth and I wrap my plump lips around the digit, swirling my tongue in loose circles.
“Fuckk.” He releases a breathy moan, his strong jaw ticking the more I suck his thumb into my mouth.
The feeling is euphoric as I watch him barely come undone before me.
Slowly, Dean slips his thumb free with an audible pop and smears the wetness across my mouth, reality quickly hits me square in the face when I realise where we are and what I’ve just done.
“I’m sorry.” I blurt out, turning my face away from him but he grips my chin again, pulling my face inches from his.
The warmth of his breath tickles my skin.
“I’m not sorry, mama. If we weren’t here I would have been tempted to shove something else into that pretty mouth.
” My breath hitches at his declaration, a tightening begins to form in my lower stomach, and he pushes his hips into mine, proving how sorry.
. He isn’t. His thick, hard cock presses into me and soft moan slips free between us.
A swirling heat of need coils around me and I rub my thighs together to try and ease the ache.
Dean’s large hand lands on my knee and runs up the outside of my thigh, his touch scorching through my jeans as he pulls my leg up onto his waist, his fingers digging into my thick flesh.
“Dean..” I moan under his touch.
“I know, baby, I know. Believe me, I desperately want to but the last thing I wanna do is hurt you when I already know that you’re hurting.
When I take you, and I will, it won’t be in a shitty hospital bed, you deserve better than that.
” His words hang in the air. I know he’s right.
I am hurting, my wounds are too raw. Curling further into him, he pulls me in, his touch leaves my thigh and runs up to my waist, barely missing my ass and round to my lower back, the pads of his fingers slipping under the material of my shirt.
Dean begins to trace circles on my skin and I let my body relax into him once again.