EPILOGUE - CAITLYN
SIX MONTHS LATER
Iwake with an intense pain in my abdomen and back. I’ve been having Braxton Hicks for the last few weeks now, but this is more intense than anything I’ve felt before.
I grab my phone, and time the contraction. It lasts a minute, before fading.
My due date is only five days away, but apparently Bubba has decided to make an early appearance.
I wait for another contraction, and almost six minutes elapses before my abdomen tightens again. The pain is sharp and intense, but it doesn’t last longer than a minute. I know it’s not soon enough to go to the hospital, but it’s certainly time to tell Dad that the baby is on the way.
I gently shake Joshua awake.
He looks at me with bleary eyes, a soft smile covering his handsome face. “What do you need?”
Bless his heart. Since finding out I was pregnant, Josh is always willing to do anything for me, even if that means midnight runs to the twenty-four-hour store to get me strange food combinations to sate my strange pregnancy cravings or giving me foot massages when my ankles are swollen.
This time though, pickles and ice cream, and foot rubs aren't going to cut it.
“It’s time,” I tell him, a small smile on my lips.
Josh’s eyes widen, all remains of tiredness vanishing in an instant. “You’re sure?”
He leaps out of bed, and hurries to the ensuite before I can even answer. He steps back into the bedroom a moment later, his toothbrush in his mouth.
Around a mouthful of toothpaste foam, he says, “I’m sorry. You should go first. What can I do to help?”
“It’s fine,” I say, gently easing myself out of bed.
I pause as my stomach contracts, and pain sweeps through my body. I screw my eyes closed and take a deep breath, letting it out slowly as the pain fades.
Josh drops his toothbrush on the dressing table, and runs to my side, but by the time he gets to me, the contraction has already subsided.
I giggle. “I told you, it’s fine. I think we have a little while to go yet.
The midwife said we don’t need to head to the antenatal clinic until the contractions are coming regularly four minutes apart, each one lasts at least one minute, and they have been following this pattern for at least one hour.
They’re about five or six minutes apart right now. ”
I waddle around the room, making sure everything is packed. Even though I know it is, as I’ve had my delivery bag ready since I hit eight months.
“I’m going to get a drink. Can you get ready, and make sure Bella doesn’t need anything, please?”
“Of course.” Josh hurries back into the bathroom, and I hear him turn the shower on.
I make my way down the hallway to the nursery, where everything is perfect, just as we left it.
I switch on the night light and look around.
My heart fills with joy as I see everything ready and waiting for the baby’s arrival.
Our friends and family have been so generous, buying everything from our registry.
Joshua and I decided at our twenty-week scan to keep the baby’s gender a surprise, so everything we have is gender-neutral.
Though we do have a male and female name picked out already.
That was the easiest part. Amber Marie if it’s a girl, in honor of my best friend and Josh’s mother, or Tucker James if it’s a boy, after Josh’s younger brother and father.
Josh was more than happy for us to name the baby after my parents, but I insisted we should honor Tucker and Amber instead.
My dad walked out on me and my mom when I was four, and I haven’t seen him since.
Whereas Tucker was always super supportive of mine and Josh’s relationship, and it’s thanks to him and Amber that we reconciled.
And well, I hope we have a second child someday that we can name Charlotte, in honor of my mother.
I settle in the rocking chair for a moment as another contraction comes.
They’re getting closer together now, and the pain is more intense.
I breathe through the pain like I’ve been taught, and then let out the breath slowly.
The time between the last two was less than five minutes, though not quite four.
Once the pain subsides, I go downstairs, open the fridge and take out the jug of ice water, along with the snack bag we packed for the antenatal clinic. I put the snacks in the delivery bag with everything else we’ll need, and then pour myself a glass of water.
Bella wakes and pads over. As if knowing what’s happening -- she’s had puppies of her own, after all -- she gently licks my hand.
“It’s okay, girl. I’m not leaving just yet. Though you will have to go stay with Amber for a few days.”
Bella wags her tail happily. Amber’s place is like a second home to Bella, and of course, going there means she will see her puppy, Elsa, who Amber adopted when she was old enough to leave her mom.
Knowing my friend will hate me if I don’t tell her that I’ll be soon heading to the hospital, I call Amber.
The phone rings and rings, and I begin to think she isn’t going to wake up, but then, she answers.
“Oh my god! Is it time?!”
“Yes, it’s time. Josh is just in the shower, and then he’ll get Bella ready and--”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll be straight over. I can collect Bella and her things and do anything else you and Josh need me to.”
“Thank you, you’re the best.” I say. Even though I’m about to become a mother, nothing in mine and Amber’s friendship has changed, and I know it never will. She’s always here when I need her, and I hope she knows she can count on me to do the same for her.
When Josh comes downstairs, I let him know Amber is on the way, and then I head upstairs to have a shower while he gets Bella’s things together.
Amber arrives not long after I’m out of the shower, and by then, the contractions are coming closer together.
“I think I’d feel more comfortable at the antenatal clinic now,” I tell Josh.
“Okay. Let's get going.”
Bella jumps up, her tail wagging excitedly, but Amber grabs her collar. “Not you. You’re coming with me for a few days. You can see the baby soon enough though.”
Bella barks happily as Josh takes the delivery bag and car seat to the car, and I cross the room to embrace Amber.
“Good luck,” my best friend says, hugging me tightly. Though not so tightly that she squashes my baby bump.
“Thank you. I’ll call you as soon as I can.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that. Call me when you feel ready. I’ll be here … well, not here, but don’t rush yourself for me. I know you’ve got all of Josh’s brothers and your mom to call.”
“Still, you’re important too. You might be this little one’s namesake.”
Amber smiles. “I hope so. We don’t need two Tucker Braddock’s.”
We both laugh as Josh comes back into the house and extends his hand to me. “Are you ready?”
Another contraction sends waves of pain through my body, and I grimace. “Yes.”
“Go, get out of here. I’ll lock up,” Amber insists, shoving me and Josh towards the door.
Thankfully, because it’s the middle of the night, the drive from East Hampton to Southampton goes quickly and smoothly.
Once we get to the antenatal clinic, things start progressing much more quickly. Me and Josh are escorted to a delivery room, where the baby’s heart rate and other vitals are monitored, and my contractions get closer and more intense.
Having come up with a birthing plan months ago, I’m insistent I don’t want any pain relief, and instead opt to rely on soaking in a birthing pool and using Entonox as pain relief.
Josh never leaves my side -- holding my hand, rubbing my back, wiping the sweat from my forehead, feeding me ice chips and anything else I need -- as I deliver our baby under the watchful gaze of both our midwife, named Anna, and Doctor Lennox, our obstetrician, who also oversaw the births of Alicia and Erin’s children.
Finally, after an hour and a half of active labor, and lots of pushing and panting, the baby crowns.
Tears fill Josh’s eyes as Anna takes the baby, and places them on my naked chest, so that we can have skin-to-skin contact.
“Congratulations, you have a beautiful daughter,” Doctor Lennox informs us, as the baby instinctively moves towards my breast. “Let her feed a little first, then we’ll check her vitals.”
Baby Amber laches on easily for her first feed, and Josh strokes a finger over his daughter’s head, already thatched with dark hair.
He presses a kiss to my sweaty brow. “You were amazing.”
I smile tiredly as endorphins flood my body, and I gaze down at my daughter in awe.
She’s absolutely perfect.
----
Doctor Lennox only keeps Amber and I at the antenatal clinic for twenty-four hours, until we’re discharged, both with perfect bills of health.
Taking Amber home feels surreal, and the house feels oddly empty without Bella, but it soon fills with the sound of baby cries, late night feeds and nappy changes.
Josh’s family are a blessing. Antony and Alicia have cooked so many meals for us that our freezer is fit to burst, and when we’re hungry, all we have to do is pop a meal in the microwave. Even Tucker has stepped up and is taking care of the gym while Joshua has paternity leave.
For the first week, we only have visitors briefly, so as not to overwhelm me, Amber and Josh, but soon enough we get into a routine and I’m even managing to get a couple of hours sleep every night.
Grown-up Amber meets her namesake when she brings Bella home, and both my best friend and dog are enthralled with my baby daughter.
“She’s perfect,” Amber says, stroking little Amber’s hair, as she snuggles her close.
To mine and Josh’s relief, Bella doesn’t make a fuss about baby Amber at all, and instead guards the baby closely, barking to alert us if Amber so much as sneezes.
When Amber is almost a month old, I’m going stir-crazy with cabin fever, and so Josh and I decide to throw a party to welcome our daughter and get the whole Braddock clan together.
It’s also the first time my mom will be meeting Josh’s whole family. We went out to visit her in New Haven just before I hit the twenty week mark, and had a lovely two week vacation with her, but she’s never visited me in East Hampton.
The house is full of laughter as Josh’s brothers, their wives and children gather to meet the new arrival. Even Alicia’s family are invited, and everyone is completely smitten by baby Amber.
Alicia’s and Ryan’s son, Benjamin, is almost six-months old, and Antony and Erin’s daughter, Diana, is only a couple of months younger.
It’s nice having two other new moms here to offer their advice, and share their experiences, and listening to Alicia and Erin tell me their perspective on becoming mothers really helps me.
My mom absolutely loves her first grandchild, and she doesn’t even mind that my daughter isn’t named after her.
“Amber is a beautiful name,” she says, as she cradles the baby in her arms. “And your friend deserves to be honored.”
I catch adult Amber out of the corner of my eye, and she grins.
“Don’t worry, if the next one is a girl, we’ll name her Charlotte,” I say, and around me everyone starts laughing.
“You’re planning another already?” Alicia asks with a raised brow. “I don’t know if I’ll ever feel ready to give Benjamin a sibling.”
“That’s because you have a brood of siblings living with you, though.”
“True enough,” Alicia agrees with a loving smile directed to her youngest sibling, Evie, who is nearby playing with her older brother Tommy, as well as Antony’s twins, Aaron and Elizabeth, and Sebastian’s son, Noah.
The children are all close in age and have become as thick as thieves since the Braddock family expanded.
We all take turns looking after them on different weekends, so the parents can have a break, and I know the tradition will continue as babies Amber, Benjamin and Diana grow into toddlers.
Sebastian is already on the lookout for horses for his new nieces and nephew, having bought all the older children ponies of their own, who now live at the ranch.
I hope as Amber grows, she will be as close with her cousins, especially Diana and Benjamin.
As everyone takes turns holding Amber, and fussing over her, Josh stands in the center of the room, and clears his throat.
“If I could just have a moment, please?” he asks, and everyone falls silent, even the younger children stop playing for a moment to listen to their uncle. The only sounds that can be heard are the babies. “First, I want to thank everyone for coming to welcome Amber Marie Braddock into the family.”
He raises his glass, and everyone else does the same, calling out, “To Amber Marie Braddock.”
“I also wanted to thank you all for your help and generosity since Amber was born. Even having been told raising a newborn is difficult, I don’t think I was fully prepared for how difficult it is. I don’t think Caitlyn and I would have gotten through the last month without you all.
“Finally, I want to thank Caitlyn, for making me happier than I could ever have imagined, and for blessing me with the most perfect baby girl.”
I feel my eyes fill with tears as Josh turns to me, and I’m unable to stop them flowing down my cheeks when he gets down on one knee and pulls a black ring box from his pocket.
Beside me, my mom gasps and squeezes my fingers.
“Caitlyn, I’ve loved you since the moment I met you, and in the past years, since we’ve gotten together and made Amber, I’ve been happier than I thought humanly possible. I want to spend the rest of my days with you, raising our children. Will you marry me?”
I can barely speak through the tears, but I manage to say, “Yes, of course I’ll marry you,” before I throw my arms around Josh’s neck, and press my lips to his.