Chapter 33
When Meleri went to bed that night, she went to her room alone after telling Robert, “If you are there, I am certain he will not come.”
She lay in bed a long time before going to sleep, hoping the earl would put in an appearance. When she awoke the next morning, she was doubly disappointed. One, because she could have slept with her husband, which was infinitely better than sleeping alone. The other disappointment was the earl’s absence. “You could have let me know you weren’t coming,” she said. “It was quite rude of you. I am certain that you knew I was expecting you. If your feelings are hurt because I did not believe in you, I am sorry. However, you must realize this hasn’t been any easier for me than it is for you. It isn’t every day I go skipping around the corner and encounter a ghost. And that is all I have to say on the matter.”
She rang for Agnes and went to her dressing table to brush the tangles from her hair. That was when she noticed her silver-backed brush was not there—and it was there the night before. She was certain of it because she brushed her hair before retiring. Perhaps Agnes moved it, she thought, so she asked her as she picked up the comb.
“No, milady. I have no idea where the brush could be.”
Still puzzled, Meleri went down to breakfast.
The next morning, the hairbrush was back in its usual place, on her dressing table. Upon further examination, the small miniature painting of her mother was gone. By the third day, the earl had still not appeared, but the miniature of her mother was back in its place, and a gentleman’s shaving mug was sitting where her golden locket had been.
Something strange was going on, Meleri knew, so she went to find whom the mug belonged to. Iain and Hugh both said it was not theirs. That left Robert.
Reluctantly, she went in search of him and learned he was in the morning room—an odd place for him to be, since the room had not been in use for quite some time. However, she decided she should become accustomed to strange things, since they always seemed to be happening around this family. When she came to the door to the morning room, she knocked.
“Come in.”
Clutching the mug, she stepped into the room and closed the door. He was standing near the window, next to a large table that was covered with papers. A nearby window was open, bringing the out-of-doors inside with a breeze that set the papers aflutter. All the furniture, save the table, was covered with white sheets. When he looked up and saw her, he seemed surprised. “Meleri, what are you doing here?”
“I was looking for you…they said you were here.”
He put the papers he was holding down on the table. “Do you know, this is the first time you have come looking for me without needing something.”
“I came to see if this belongs to you.” She held the mug out.
He moved toward her and stopped just inches away. “Aye, where did you get it?”
She explained how things had been disappearing and reappearing in her room, and how today, her locket was gone and the mug was in its place.
He was wearing an immaculately tailored black coat that had seen some wear, but on him, even a worn coat was a magnificent sight. “A missing locket…” He put the mug down and reached inside his coat to withdraw her locket, holding it up by the chain. “Is this yours, by chance?”
She watched the locket spin and whirl for a moment. “Yes. I suppose you found it in place of your mug.”
“Precisely.” He reached up to take one bright red curl and rubbed it between his fingers. As he did, he allowed his gaze to wander leisurely over her body and then return to her warming face. His smile was slow, thought provoking and oh, so sensuous.
“Thank you for the locket. It was my mother’s. I would have hated to lose it.”
He dropped the curl he was holding. “Allow me.” He took the locket from her hand. “Turn around.”
She turned and felt the electric shock of his skin coming in contact with hers as he placed the locket around her neck. When he was done, he did not remove his hands, but let them drop to rest upon her shoulders. “I missed you last night.”
“And I you. I suppose I had better be going, so you can finish what you were doing.” She made a move to leave, but he tightened his hold on her.
“There’s no hurry. I’m interested in hearing why your friend is collecting trinkets and returning them to the wrong room.”
“I don’t know, but I think he is letting me know he is still around, and by not appearing, that he is still upset with me.”
He kissed her shoulder and kept on kissing his way across her neck to the other shoulder. “He is a bit petulant, isn’t he?”
“Thankfully, he is your ancestor. What do you think I should do?”
“I never thought I would see the day I would be asked to devise a way to humor a disgruntled ghost.”
“Oh, that is a wonderful idea!” she said, quite forgetting herself and turning around to fling her arms around his neck. She intended to give him a sisterly kiss on the cheek, to thank him for the idea he had given her. She learned he was quite deft at maneuvers, however, for the next thing she knew, she was in his arms. “I need to think and I can’t when you are doing this.”
“Then, don’t think,” he said. “Feel.” His mouth came down on hers, his hands cradling her head and tangling into her hair. His kiss ravaged her mouth and left her hungry for more, yet even then, she tried to pull away from him. In response, the flat of his hand slid down to the small of her back and drew her even closer against him. Her eyes fluttered shut on the intention that if she did so, she could pretend he was not there. It didn’t work. He had too many ways to prove that he was. His hands moved at will, roaming, lingering, pausing, learning, until she realized she had no idea she was composed of so many hills and valleys, mountains, plains and curves. Not to mention highly sensitive ones.
“Have you thought of anything yet?” he asked in a low, murmuring voice that fairly set her to humming.
“No, I need to go elsewhere to think. I cannot do it here. You are too distracting.”
“Going isn’t one of your choices. Right now, you should be telling me you like what I’m doing.”
“And if I say I don’t like it?”
“I would say your body tells me differently. I have caught a hint or two, the slightest response—” he pressed her against him, closer this time “—there, you felt it, too, didn’t you?”
She was thinking of a clever response when he began kissing her face, as if he were blind and learning the location of everything by touch. Her body was aching, until she felt she was bursting into a rainbow prism. “You should let me go think about your contumacious ancestor. I’m trying to help you, you know.”
“Let me thank you properly, then.” His arms came around her lightly, his hands finding the place at the base of her head where the hair was fine and curled slightly. He kissed all the major points on her face, then kissed her deeply. As she shivered with the pleasure of it, a moan burned in her throat. She pressed against him, feeling him against her breasts.
“You feel good,” he whispered, kissing the slope of her neck, just below her ear. “And you smell good.” He kissed her cheek. “Let’s see how good you taste.”
The silken contact of his mouth on hers was her undoing. She was thinking this was what she had wanted since they were married—a few moments alone, to touch and kiss, to learn about each other in an intimate way. She was eager. He was more so. From the moment they touched, she was aware of just how badly she wanted this, needed this time of sharing closeness. He made up for all the kisses she should have had, for all the tender touches and longing looks she had been deprived of.
Robert took her hand and led her to the sofa. He paused long enough to draw back the sheet, then he drew her down with him and the two of them reclined. “This is better,” he said, his hand on her breast. “I could grow accustomed to this every afternoon.” He kissed her again and again, until her lips were swollen. Still kissing her, he lifted his hands up to the buttons of her dress.
“Do you think we should be doing this in here?” she asked.
“Shh. I told you no one ever comes in here,” he said, going after the buttons again.
He opened her dress and was kissing his way down the open front when they heard voices coming from outside the door. She gasped. “Oh, no!”
“It’s all right,” he said, and he pulled the sheet up over them, covering their heads as well. “It’s just someone passing by.”
A door creaked open and a voice she recognized as Gram’s said, “That piece of linen will make perfect aprons, and it is large enough to make one for each of you.”
Meleri turned into a statue. Beneath her, Robert was moving his leg. She pressed her mouth against his ear and whispered so low, she could barely hear it herself. “Be still! What are you doing?”
“Trying to get my foot under the sheet. It is sticking out.” He moved again.
Meleri had never prayed so hard in her life.
“Gram! Look! Something is moving on the sofa.” It was one of the twins, but Meleri wasn’t certain which one, since they sounded as identical as they looked.
“Where, child?”
Robert stopped moving.
Meleri held her breath.
“Over there, on that sofa.”
“I don’t see anything moving. It was probably a draft.”
“Drafts don’t have feet.”
“Saints above! Is that another dead body?”
The sheet was suddenly ripped back.
Meleri and Robert stared up into the face of his grandmother like two downy owls blinking against a bright light. The twins, who flanked her on either side, were staring back at them in the same wide-eyed fashion.
“Hello,” Meleri said.
“Whatever are the two of you doing in here?” Lady Margaret asked.
“Do you really have to ask? Has it been that long?”
“Aye,” she said, “’tis been too long, but I ken you have just given me back a memory. But, why are you in here?”
“We were trying to have some privacy,” Robert replied.
“By putting a sheet over your head?”
“I heard you in the hall,” he said, and came to his feet. “It seemed a good way to avoid detection.”
“If you want to avoid detection, don’t hide under sheets in the morning room.”
“Why are you in here?” he asked.
“The twins need aprons. I was looking for an old linen tablecloth.”
Meleri tried to indiscreetly shift her clothes into their proper position and realized she was clutching the sheet against her, just as Robert stood and pulled her up with him. She kept hold of the sheet with one hand after Robert took her other hand to lead her from the room. They hadn’t walked very far before she tripped over it. The second time it happened, the two of them lost control. Unable to hold their mouths in a tight grimace any longer, the room was soon filled with laughter.
“I worry about you, Robert,” Gram said. “Truly I do.”
“At last!” Robert said when they reached his room.
By the time he put his hand on the door, Meleri’s heart was pounding with vigorous expectancy. She trembled with excitement, happy that she was no longer inexperienced. She knew what to expect. She looked forward to it. When she saw he was holding the door open for her, she stepped into his room. He took her in his arms. “What were you thinking?”
She put her forehead against his chest. “I was anticipating.”
He chuckled and lifted her chin until she was looking at him. “Nothing to be ashamed of. We are all creatures of desire. I’ve been tripping over my high hopes for days.”
There’s something wonderful about a man who can always make you laugh, Meleri thought.
They began to undress and she seemed to be all thumbs. He already had his boots off and she had yet to locate her buttons. He must have noticed, for he said, “What’s wrong?”
She found a button and fiddled with it a minute. “I seem to have misplaced my buttonhole.”
He laughed. “Come over here and I’ll help you.”
He had a steady hand as he began to undress her, but he soon became frustrated. The cause was the dozen tiny buttons against his large fingers. “One would need the patience of Job to put something like this on every day.”
“Job or Agnes,” she said.
“Saints be praised!” he said with enthusiasm when he finished the last button.
They both laughed and she began peeling his doublet from his shoulders. His shirt came next, and she took a moment to run her hands over his skin, learning the feel and texture of him. He was smoother and softer than she thought a man would be. She wondered about the rest of him and moved on, undoing the fastenings of his breeches, which she tugged down to the floor as he stepped out of them. While she was still hunkered down, she glanced up at him, but never made it as far as his face, for something just above her head caught her attention.
“A slight distraction,” he said. “Do you find it frightening?”
“To the contrary. I am quite fascinated. It is simply that I have never met one, face-to-face.”
He laughed again. Then he pulled her up and held her close against him. As curious as he, her hands slid downward. He made a small sound and searched for her mouth, content for some time just to kiss, allowing his hands free rein. She could feel the moment he was ready to move on to something else, and she thought them well matched, for she found that she was ready, too. She gave a surprised gasp when he suddenly lifted her into his arms and carried her to the bed, where he sat, still holding her. He leaned back until he was lying down and she lay on top of him. She lowered her head and kissed him, aware of the change in his breathing and the way hers seemed to follow in suit.
“I liked it better when you were on top,” she said.
In reply, he rolled over, putting her beneath him. “So do I,” he said. “Tell me if I am too heavy.”
In answer, she pulled him down for a kiss. Soon then they were joined. Together at last, in unison, sharing, touching, knowing that there would be so many more times like this, and knowing it still would not be enough.
Later, when they slipped into a tranquil sense of togetherness, lying quietly, their bodies still entwined, she kissed his shoulder. He squeezed her hand. “Do you know something?” he asked.
“What?”
“I never expected to feel like this about anyone. I knew I would marry, and possibly fall in love. But to this degree and intensity, I never imagined.”
“Love was something I heard about but never witnessed,” she said. “I was beginning to doubt its existence.”
“As did I. Now I know love is as wonderful as they say it is. It’s not something you can be taught. It only comes by loving, and in the end, you will risk anything to have it. Everything looks more beautiful when seen through loving eyes. It is worth a king’s ransom, worth waiting for, worth fighting for, even worth dying for. The best thing is, it’s a gift. We are free to give it, to receive it, to wallow in it if we please. We can write about it, talk about it, think about it and sing about it. We can even give it away, but we cannot command it. Once it ceases to be free, it no longer exists.”
“That was beautiful,” she said. “Where did you learn so much about love?”
“From you.”
Later in the day, the men took the dogs hunting. Shortly after, Lady Margaret left with the twins, for she had agreed to accompany them to pay a call on their friend, Jane Graham. Meleri was in her room, talking to Agnes about Robert’s comment to humor the ghost. “That is precisely what I need to do…only, how does one go about humoring a ghost?”
“I haven’t any idea, milady, but I have confidence you will find a way.”
“Do you have any ideas?”
“Oh, no, milady. I haven’t any notions about it at all. I only know one thing about ghosts, and that is to run if I should encounter one.”
Agnes, with her clucking around, was a distraction, so Meleri decided since everyone was gone she would go have a cup of tea in the morning room and think upon it. What would appease the earl? she kept asking herself as she made her way there. What would he respect? What would impress him or any man?
Bravery.
The word simply popped into her head. She hurried into the room and took out a piece of paper and dipped the pen into the silver inkwell, then wrote the word bravery. Beneath it, she listed various things she could do to exhibit some sort of bravery:
1. Milk a cow. Since she was afraid of cows, having been kicked by one as a child.
2. Ride a horse astride, without a saddle. She decided that was more absurd than brave.
3. Spend the night in a graveyard. Thankfully, Robert would never allow that.
4. Walk along the parapets that surrounded the oldest wing of the castle.
She immediately crossed that one out. There were some things she would not even consider.
She read back over the list and decided these deeds did not sound very brave. She realized she wasn’t getting anywhere, so she turned the paper over and began to list things she was not inclined to do, things that she found frightening, but all she could come up with was one thing. There was one place in the castle that she avoided, a place she had not the slightest desire to see, a place she was afraid of.
The dungeon.
“Oh, no,” she said. “I won’t do that. Never. Never. Never. I would rather stick needles in my eyes!”
She should have known.
A week passed and Meleri still had not seen the earl, although she knew he was about, for things were disappearing and reappearing in her room on a regular basis. She decided to stop thinking about a pouting ghost and get on with other things. On this particular day, she put Gowan and Fingal to work cleaning out the accumulation of a dozen years from the morning room. After her visit there when Lady Margaret and the twins surprised her and Robert, she wanted to open the room and put it to good use. It was simply too lovely to remain closed off.
The twins arrived eager to help. They were in the highest of spirits since the additions to their wardrobes. Meleri noticed today they were wearing their old dresses beneath the aprons Lady Margaret made for them, and she found that endearing, for she knew how badly they wanted to wear their new ones.
“We came to see if we could help,” Ciorstag said.
“Oh, yes, may we please? We have always loved this room,” Catriona said. “We asked Gram to open it up several times, but she said she was too old to oversee so much house.”
Meleri looked at their bright, eager faces and agreed. How could she not? They were such a delight to be around. “Of course you may help. I was just wondering who could carry these linens to the kitchen.”
“We can!” they said in unison, and Meleri hugged them both. “Tell Fiona to put them with the others in the linen cupboard. There is plenty of room for them now, since we set the kitchen to order.”
Catriona and Ciorstag stood like porcelain mannequins, their expressions eager as they held out their arms, while Meleri stacked linens for them to carry. “That should be enough,” she said. “No point in breaking your backs. You can always come back for another load. One more trip should do it, I think.”
After they were gone, Meleri began pulling the sheets from the furniture, discovering many lovely pieces whose quality was superior to anything she had seen elsewhere in the castle. A little lacquered cabinet signed by Pierre Garnier was in excellent condition, and so were the pair of gilt-framed chairs, upholstered in yellow damask. A small desk with a silver inkwell and an elegantly gilded French lamp stood in front of the windows. The draperies were of a pale green silk—which turned out to be a darker shade once they were dusted. When she discovered numerous bronze statues and vases of chased silver, she put Gowan and Fingal to work polishing them.
Many of the other pieces in the room were quite nice and functional, although not of the fine quality of the lacquered cabinet and the gilt chairs. An old, glass-fronted china cabinet was shoved against a corner, and upon closer inspection, she discovered it to be filled with exquisite pieces of porcelain, while on top, an ornate footed bowl of silver was found hidden beneath a dusty cloth.
More silver was stuffed in a small closet, which was locked. That fact did not slow Meleri down, for she was an old hand at picking locks. She was just in the midst of picking the lock, when the twins returned with downcast faces. “Papa says we must attend to our studies now.”
“Of course you must.”
“But we want to help you.”
“If you do an exceptional job on your studies, you may come back when you are done.”
About that time, Catriona noticed what Meleri was doing. She looked at her sister and the two of them giggled. “Where did you learn to do that?” Catriona asked.
“One of my father’s stable hands taught me.”
“Why did you want to learn?” Ciorstag asked.
“I was nosy, I suppose. It is a good way to know what is going on around you,” she said.
“Will you teach us?” Ciorstag asked.
“I don’t know…”
“Oh, please do,” Ciorstag pleaded. “No one ever tells us anything.”
That was precisely why Meleri had learned, so she was happy to pass the talent on.
Once she finished picking the lock to the closet, she opened it. Inside were mugs, salvers, wine coasters, water pitchers, serving pieces, candlesticks and a set of silverware, so heavily tarnished they were black. Then she spent a few minutes instructing the twins on the finer points of lock picking. “Run along to your studies now. We can practice again, if you like.”
“Oh, we would, we would!” Ciorstag said, and danced toward the door with her sister mimicking her every move.
After they left, Meleri arranged furniture and organized the china figurines in the vitrine. Fingal and Gowan finished their polishing and left to do other chores, since the room was almost finished. The last task remaining was to find the perfect place for the bronzes and pieces of chased silver. Once that was done, she sat in one of the yellow damask chairs and enjoyed the beauty of such a room. She closed her eyes and inhaled the odors that surrounded her—the wax on floors and furniture, fresh air let in through the open windows, the seductive aroma of old things—all combined with a little bowl of aromatic cedar, which gave off its subtle fragrance.
She found herself thinking how many things remained to be done and how there would not be any money to do the rooms within the castle, let alone the gardens, or the restoration of the ruined wing. If only that most stubborn of all ghosts would appear and tell her where the Douglas jewels were hidden.
Dungeon.
There that word was again, popping into her head as it had a dozen times over the past week. “I don’t care how many times you remind me of that word, I am not going down there. Find another place.”