Chapter seven
Penn
“What’s for dinner tonight?” I peek over my mother’s shoulder as she stirs something on the stove.
“Chicken bog,” she says, swatting me away. “Now get out of here so I can finish cooking.”
“We haven’t had that in a while.” The rice, chicken, and beef sausage are boiling in the broth in the pot, infiltrating the air around the kitchen, making my mouth water.
“I know. I had a craving for it, so for once, I’m making what I want to eat,” my mother replies.
It’s Sunday, which means family dinner night.
We don’t always make it each week, but the weeks we can, my brothers and sister and I gather at our childhood home and Mom cooks us a meal like she did when we still lived here.
Even before Dad died, this was a tradition.
But now that he’s gone, it’s even more important to all come together.
“You know we’ll eat whatever you make, Mom.
” I kiss her on the cheek and then head to the fridge, grabbing a beer for me and Dallas.
My brother and Willow are currently outside on my parents’ deck, watching the sun set in the distance.
His arm is wrapped around her, and as I watch them, envy courses through me.
I want to have that with Astrid.
As much as I hate to admit it, my brother gave me the clarity I needed Friday night. My anxiety is at an all-time high, but that’s because I’m making risky moves in my life for the first time. It’s fucking terrifying, but I don’t want to live with regrets.
As I open the back door, Dallas glances over Willow’s head to meet my eyes. “What’s up, dickhead?”
Willow elbows him in the ribs. “Don’t call him that.”
“It’s okay. You may not understand it, but it’s actually a term of endearment between us.” I hand my brother his beer.
Willow shakes her head. “I’ll never understand men in that regard, I guess.”
“It’s the brotherly thing too,” Dallas adds. “Just wait until Parker gets here. He’ll probably refer to us in the same way.”
“You realize I’ve seen the three of you interact, right? I’m aware that you call each other names. I just don’t understand it,” Willow says.
This isn’t her first family dinner that she’s attended, but now that she’s a part of our lives, she’s becoming accustomed to the way we talk to one another.
If Astrid were here, she’d already know too.
Dallas kisses her temple, pulling her in closer to his body. “Just let it be, babe. It is what it is.” Then my brother meets my eyes again. “You doing better than you were Friday night?”
I nod, popping the top on my beer and taking a sip. “Yeah. Thanks for letting me leave. I needed to demolish some shit.”
Willow squints at me. “What happened Friday night?”
Dallas turns Willow in his arms so they’re both facing me now. “Penn was on the verge of a meltdown at the restaurant. I had to let him go early before he punched Dick Cockwell in the face.”
Willow’s eyes go wide. “The guy Astrid is going on a date with?” She practically shoves Dallas off her as she stands and steps closer to me. “What happened?”
“Jesus, do you tell her everything?” I ask my brother.
“He didn’t have to. Astrid did,” Willow answers for him.
I drop my eyes to hers. “She told you about her date?”
“I went over to her house Friday night to hang out, and yeah…she told me.” And then it dawns on her. “Oh my god! You’re jealous, huh?”
I close my eyes and huff out a breath. “Jesus, I’m not jealous.”
“Yes, you are,” Dallas says matter-of-factly.
Willow practically vibrates with excitement. “Oh my god. Does this mean you’re finally going to do something about your feelings for her?”
Pinching the bridge of my nose, I mutter, “Nothing is a secret in this family, I swear.”
Willow shoves my shoulder. “It’s not a secret when everyone can see it, Penn. Like I told you at her going away party, I get why you don’t cross that line. But if she goes out with Richard, you’re going to kick yourself for letting her slip away.”
“That’s what I told him,” Dallas interjects.
“I know, all right? I fucking know.” I drain half of my beer before continuing. “Look, I’m going to talk to her, okay? I’ve made the fucking decision and I’m tired of us tiptoeing around each other, but I can’t just ambush her. I need to do this right.”
Willow folds in her lips to hide her smile and bounces on her feet. “Oh my god! I’m so fucking excited!”
Dallas laughs at her. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Goose. He has to actually go through with it.”
“You think I won’t?”
Dallas shrugs. “I think you overthink shit too much.”
“Well, what if I told you that I’m quitting the restaurant and the hardware store?”
Both of their eyes snap to mine. “What?” Dallas asks. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah, I am. Not yet, but soon. I was going to wait to tell you, but since you’re being a dick, now seemed like a good time.” I flip him the bird.
Dallas furrows his brow. “Why are you quitting?”
I take a deep breath and finally utter the words out loud. “I’m starting my own business.”
Willow’s eyes bug out. “Penn! That’s amazing! Do you need an investor?” She grabs my bicep with both of her hands.
Chuckling, I say, “Not right now, but I appreciate the offer, Willow. Especially since you have no idea what I’m doing yet.”
“Doesn’t matter. I would invest in you in a heartbeat. I know how hardworking you are, and I know you won’t fail.”
I pull her in for a hug, wishing I had the same confidence in myself that she does.
“That means a lot. Thanks.” It’s crazy to me that I’ve only known this woman for a few months, but she already feels like my sister-in-law, like a part of our family that was missing.
And the fact that she believes in me without question boosts my confidence that I’m making the right decision.
“So what are you going to do?” Dallas asks.
“I’m going to buy houses and turn them into rentals for tourists and maybe residents of the town. I want to offer more lodging for people visiting mostly. The Cove Inn can only accommodate so many people, you know? I’ll still do contract work on the side. I’m just ready to be my own boss.”
Dallas smirks. “It’s about fucking time.”
I roll my eyes. “Yeah, I know.”
Willow squeezes my arm. “This is amazing, Penn. What made you decide to go for it?”
“Pam contacted me about a house for sale that I couldn’t pass up. But honestly…” I stare out across the yard. “It was Astrid.”
They both look at me knowingly, so I’m guessing I don’t need to explain why.
“So, what about Dick?” Dallas asks.
“I don’t know. I haven’t figured that out yet.”
“Well, you should. Clock’s ticking,” he says.
Willow grabs my forearm now to get my attention. “She doesn’t really want to go out with him, you know.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because she told me. Well, not in those words exactly, but the message was clear under the surface. I think you should talk to her, Penn. Like, soon.” She widens her eyes to the point that she almost looks scary.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” I move away from her, slightly concerned.
“She may have some insider knowledge,” Dallas mutters against the lip of his beer can.
Confused, I look back at Willow. “What the fuck is he talking about?”
Willow smirks. “Let’s just say I think Astrid would drop Dick in a heartbeat if you gave her a reason to, Penn,” she whispers, leaning back into my brother’s chest. The two of them are acting like teenagers, giddy because their friends are crushing on each other and they’re in on it.
Jesus, is this what this situation has come to?
“As much as I appreciate the two of you trying to be matchmakers, just stay out of it, okay? I’ll act when the time is right.”
Dallas mumbles in Willow’s ear. “That means we’ll be waiting another year.”
“Fuck you.”
Dallas laughs and Willow chastises him just as Parker exits the house and joins us outside. “Hey, it’s the hometown hero! Save any kittens from trees today?” Dallas says to our younger brother.
“I’m not a firefighter, moron,” Parker replies, flipping Dallas off as he lifts a beer to his lips.
See? This is how we tell each other we care. It’s our own love language.
“Too bad. Firefighters are hot,” Willow chimes in. “I recently read a book about a firefighter who marries a girl he’s been crushing on to help her in a custody battle. And believe me, he definitely set those pages and my loins on fire.”
The three of us just stare at her.
Willow rolls her eyes and begins to walk back to the house. “If there were another girl out here, they totally would have appreciated that.”
The door shuts behind her and then Parker and I turn to Dallas. “Did you know she reads books like that?”
Dallas smirks as he lifts his beer to his lips. “Who do you think helps her live out the scenes when they get her all worked up?” He waggles his eyebrows as Parker and I groan.
“Didn’t need to know that,” Parker grumbles.
“You’re just jealous because I’m getting laid regularly. Very regularly. So regularly it’s probably considered irregular.”
I just roll my eyes, but Parker replies, “Not that it’s any of your business, but I got some action not too long ago.”
I pat my brother on his shoulder. “By someone other than your hand? Good for you.” I know it’s ironic that I’m giving him shit for the same circumstance I’m in—a dry spell by choice—but this is just what we do to each other.
He pushes my hand away. “Fuck you. It was at the conference I went to last month. I met this girl on the plane and she was gorgeous. One night, no names.” He blows out a breath. “It was hot.”
“Nice to see someone is breaking their dry spell,” Dallas says, eyeing me from the side. “But I gotta say, having the same woman in your bed every night is so much better.”
Even though it’s been years since I’ve been with a woman, I have to agree. Knowing someone under the surface and learning their body makes that physical connection so much more intense.
I can only imagine how mind-blowing it would be with Astrid.
Fuck. She just might ruin me if that’s the case.