Chapter 38
Dylan
The touch of Kelsi’s lips against his was soft, tentative, as he held still. He waited for her to lead, to deepen this kiss and let him know that this was okay, that it was what she wanted.
Slowly, so very slowly, she pressed her lips firmer against his.
Kelsi’s lips parted under his own as her hands slowly came up from where she had them pressed to the door to coast along his sides, up his ribs, and to his neck.
She twined her arms around his neck and pushed a hand through his hair, raking her nails across his scalp lightly so that tingles of pleasure erupted down his spine.
He groaned into her mouth, and his control snapped. Dylan pressed her firmly against the door and shook at the feel of her body pressed against his. His tongue licked at the seam of her lips, begging entrance. She parted her lips and the taste of her, of cherries, was nearly his undoing.
He’d imagined this moment between them for years, and now that it was here, he could hardly believe it. Kelsi telling him her side of their fight hit him hard. His chest ached at her words about her dad. Looking back, he regretted leaving her, but at the time it had felt like she didn’t care.
Now, though, she was his. There was no more confusion between them over where they stood, and he was thrilled they were finally on the same page.
Each brush of their lips, each stroke of his tongue against hers, ignited the desire between them into a feverish pitch.
The kiss turned frantic, and Dylan reached his arms down underneath Kelsi’s thighs as he hoisted her into his arms, her legs automatically winding around his waist. He spun them around, never taking his mouth from hers, and blindly moved to the bed.
When the mattress hit his thighs, he lowered Kelsi down onto it and moved up her body until he was hovering over her. Gazing down into her eyes, he gently brushed a strand of her beautiful red hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear.
Groaning, he leaned away from her, panting to catch his breath. She opened her eyes, clearly confused at his retreat. He grabbed her hands in his own, stroking her fluttering pulse softly.
“I want there to be no more secrets between us, Kelsi. I want you to understand completely what it means, being with me, if that’s what you’d be interested in after you hear everything.”
She opened her mouth to speak, but he gave her a stern look with a raised brow, and she shut her mouth once more with a roll of her eyes.
“Brat,” he teased, tapping the tip of her nose with their joined hands. His expression turned serious once more, though, and he took a deep breath before speaking. “You asked me before what happened. How I got my injury,” he clarified.
Her eyes searched his, no doubt seeing the pain he tried desperately to hide but was riding close to the surface tonight. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, Dylan. It won’t change how I feel about you.”
He gave her a small, sad smile and leaned back on his ankles before grimacing at the pain that shot through his injured leg from the position.
He rolled sideways and settled down onto the bed beside her, so they were both reclined, staring up at the ceiling.
It was easier, this way, for him to speak about what happened.
“We were on a joint training exercise with local forces out in the desert. We didn’t do those often, but it was supposed to be routine. On our way back in, Boone was driving the Humvee. He saw some kid run into the street waving his arms, and he pulled over, thinking the kid needed help.”
His breath rattled in his chest, and he had to swallow a few times to get the thickness in his throat to abate enough for the rest of the story to escape. Kelsi’s hand settled atop his on the bed, fingers intertwining. He gave hers a gentle squeeze before continuing.
“We all got out of the vehicle, rifles drawn but at ease. We thought it was some kid . . .” His voice was quiet, barely above a whisper.
“It was a trap. The kid ran off when we were out around the vehicle. We had barely moved to follow him before the blast went off. There was no warning. One second the street was clear, quiet. The next, everything was on fire and the only thing I could hear was ringing and my heart beating in my ears.” He closed his eyes tightly, breath harsh.
“Jace was closest to the place the IED hit. He died instantly. A piece of metal from the device went through his neck.”
Kelsi’s sharp inhale reminded him she was with him, that he was in Virginia Beach, and not back in the desert.
“Shrapnel hit me, too.” His free hand dropped to his injury, absent-mindedly massaging the scar tissue, remembering the sensation of the metal piercing his skin.
“It narrowly missed the artery. I nearly bled out there in the dust like Jace. Mav was there, though. He got to me quickly and did field work, stapling me together as the others dragged Jace’s body and mine into the Humvee and gave cover from the gunfire that had started.
They raced back to base and had a helicopter there ready to airlift me as soon as we pulled in. ”
Kelsi’s sniffles made him shift his head on the pillow to face her, and he found her already turned in his direction, green eyes shining brightly behind a sheen of tears.
“I almost died. I wonder all the time why I survived, and not Jace. Jace had a wife. A kid. They got married young, and he loved her so much. He talked about her all the time.”
Tears tracked down Kelsi’s cheek onto the pillow.
“I wonder why, when he had so much to live for, he died and I didn’t.” He choked on the last words, and he felt his own hot tears snake silently down his face to dampen the pillow beneath his cheek.
“Oh, Dylan.” Kelsi’s eyes were heartbroken as they met his, and she squeezed his hand tighter.
“There’s no rhyme or reason for these things.
Terrible things happen every day to people who don’t deserve it, but that doesn’t mean that the people who survive don’t also have the right to live and to be happy. ”
“I’m scarred, Red. Maverick saved my life, but the shrapnel tore apart the muscle and tissue.
The surgeons did their best to get it to heal correctly, but not everything did.
The nerves still bother me, and the scar tissue is deep.
I’m not whole like I used to be. I don’t know if I’m good enough for you anymore.
There’s so many things I won’t be able to do for you.
I won’t be able to dance with you on our wedding day.
I won’t be able to coach our kid’s soccer team. ”
She reached up with her free hand and stroked his cheek softly.
“I’m scarred too, Dylan. Mine are just on the inside.
” She smiled sadly at him. “You don’t have to be perfect, none of us are, but that doesn’t mean you’re not whole.
You’re allowed to struggle and have bad days.
But I want to be there for you on every one of them.
And I never want to hear you say again that you’re not good enough for me.
You are the most incredible person I’ve ever met, and I could never imagine there being anyone else for me.
You already danced with me at Crow’s Nest, so don’t pretend you won’t be able to dance at our wedding.
And as for coaching our kids’ sports teams?
Pretty sure you don’t have to get on the field to be a good coach.
We’ll take each day as they come, and deal with any obstacles we run into.
But this is not the end of the world. I can’t think of anything that we won’t be able to do together. ”
He grabbed her hand and kissed her fingertips. Dylan let the warm glow of her words settle over him, quieting the fears and doubts in his mind. They stayed there, staring in each other’s eyes as they lay on their sides facing one another, both of them absorbing all the confessions of the past hour.
The moment stretched between the two of them, and as Dylan began to lower his head toward hers once more, his cell phone blared out with an incoming call. He grumbled, annoyed at being interrupted in this moment with her, but pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead before rolling over.
He made his way to the table and picked up his phone, swiping to answer it as he turned around to observe Kelsi. She was propped up on her elbows, still reclined on his bed, watching him with flushed cheeks.
He couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he looked at her.
“This is Dylan,” he spoke into the phone.
“Dylan, hey!” Glasses clinking and the murmurs of a crowd filtered through the phone speakers underneath the voice of his old squad mate.
“Hey, Kole. What’s going on?”
“You still up for meeting us tonight? The guys are here already. We’re ’bout to start a game of pool but we know how you like to be the bastard who breaks.”
Dylan pulled the phone away from his ear to look at the time on the phone’s display. Shit. He’d totally lost track of time and forgotten about his plans to hang out with the other guys from his squad. It was Jace’s birthday, and they’d planned to celebrate his memory that night.
He looked over to Kelsi, who must have understood his internal dilemma, because she nodded at him, smiling.
“Yeah, man. I’ll be over in a few. Sorry, lost track of time here.” He smirked at Kelsi, who rolled her eyes at him. “Don’t you assholes dare break without me.”
Kole’s laugh was a quick bark. “Knew it. We’ll wait for you, but you’ve got fifteen minutes before we leave your ass behind.”
When he hung up the phone, he looked back at Kelsi, who had now gotten off the bed and was gathering her purse from the floor by the door. He couldn’t recall when she’d dropped it there.
“I’m sorry,” he began lamely, not knowing exactly what to say after all that had happened. They’d gotten so much out between them, but they hadn’t clarified where they stand now. He debated dragging her back to the bed and forgetting about the guys.
“It’s okay, I know you’ve been looking forward to seeing them all week. You should go.” She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. “Besides, I have my whiskey warm-up to do, so I should get out of here anyway.”
“Your what?” He spluttered a surprised laugh.
“My night-before-a-jury-trial routine. I call it my whiskey warm-up.”
He smirked down at her. “One day, I’m going to see this secret routine of yours.”
She giggled, and the sound made his heart thump harder and warmth spread in his chest.
“It’s not really a secret, but I’d like that.”
He lightly held her in place by her upper arms, thumbs stroking back and forth across her silken blouse.
“Hey, are you sure you’re going to be okay on your own?
That guy harassing you is still out there, and this is his last chance to get to you before the trial.
We could go to the judge with the notes and see what she has to say. ”
Her eyes softened as she met his concerned gaze.
“I appreciate you looking out for me.” She punctuated this with a peck on his cheek.
“But I will be fine. I’ll be in public. We can’t go to Judge Bolton, either.
She can’t do anything about it because nothing ties it back to McGuinness.
The police are out too. I don’t trust that he doesn’t have connections who would tell him or his attorney about any complaints we raised.
Will you be okay? He’s only been sending the notes to me, but it’s not only my safety he’s threatened. ”
“Are you sure?” he questioned again. If she said she needed him, he’d tell the guys to bug off in a heartbeat.
“I really don’t mind sending the guys a rain check if you would feel better with me there.
You don’t have to worry about me either.
I did train with our nation’s best, and if I go to the bar I’ll be surrounded by military vets.
” He gave her a joking smirk. “Oh, that’s an idea.
You could come with me and be protected there. ”
She popped up on her toes and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips to quiet him. The familiar touch made his chest clench and his cheeks warm.
“Go, have fun. I’ll see you in the morning. I’ll be okay with Abby to protect me.”
With that, she turned and walked out of his hotel room, leaving him frozen to the spot, but taking his heart in her hands.