Chapter IV #6
“I couldn’t let them take the sheets,” Ariana said as Fia came up beside her.
Her eyes locked on Fia’s own, and she still seemed to be pleading for help or comprehension, though Fia could not imagine why, now the irksome courtiers had left and the room was cooler.
“Or the cloths, or the wash water. Not any of it. They burn what they can, and what they can’t is carted to the nearest ravine and tossed to the bottom, and it just lies there. ”
“I’ll take care of it,” Fia reassured her. “As soon as the prince is fed. Which of the Three would you like your women’s offering—”
But Ariana held a finger to her lips, and Fia could feel the strength of her fear once more, a sickening wave of terror as the queen pulled back a light fold of linen from the face of the stillborn child in her arms.
A shock ran through Fia, setting her aflame from head to toe.
Small and silent as the queen’s infant daughter was, she blinked up with murky blue eyes and turned toward the sudden increase of light.
A miniature crescent of snow-white stars marked her already, curving around the outer edge of her left brow and her eye.
“But—” Fia began softly, and the queen shook her head.
“She had no breath when they gave her to me, and no goddess mark, either,” Ariana said, so low that Fia had to bend closer to catch her words.
“Then life sparked in her, and her mark appeared. They were all busy with the prince, and I knew—this is her chance, Fia. Her chance at freedom. I gave Celina what I could, helping to ensure she was placed at Raea’s cloister, but it will never be enough.
She’ll always be caught between worlds—between her goddess and her blood.
But this one—she can be whole. She can be Lyria’s alone, and never know otherwise.
It’s the work of the Three themselves that you walked into this room just now. ”
Ariana was begging, and Fia was powerless to resist. She’d left everything she knew behind in an attempt to gain a better life for Miriel.
There was nothing she would not do to purchase greater security and happiness on behalf of her daughter.
How could she refuse another woman trying to do the same, even if it meant involving herself in the affairs and intrigues of kings and queens?
“What can I do?” Fia asked, pitching her voice to match Ariana’s. “How can I help?”
Consciously, Fia strove to project what she’d felt from Matria Dolenza in difficult situations—an air of reassurance. Of competence, and certainty. Tears swam in the queen’s dark eyes, and Ariana pressed her lips together, struggling to regain composure before answering.
“You must take her to the Priest,” Ariana murmured. “He’ll know what to do.”
“The Inver Priest?” Fia asked doubtfully. “Are you certain?”
“Yes,” Ariana said. “But wait. What will you do if she cries along the way and someone overhears?”
Fia drew the little prince from her breast and covered herself. He’d fallen fast asleep, his sweet mouth gone slack, and he stayed limp and peaceful as she settled him into his mother’s arms.
“I’ll hide her goddess mark,” Fia said. “And say she’s the prince, who I’m taking to be blessed by your gods. No one will know any better.”
Ariana nodded. For the briefest moment, she sat still, staring down at the two infants in her arms. Then she bowed low to kiss her daughter’s face, leaving it wet with tears as Fia had done with the prince.
“Take her,” Ariana ordered, her voice low and broken. “Take her before I lose the will for this.”
Fia did, gathering up the small, silent princess and draping a loose corner of linen over her face, just as the queen had done.
But on the threshold, Ariana stopped her.
“Fia,” the queen said. “You left a child of your own behind? Does it hurt you, to be apart?”
Fia looked back. Ariana still lay surrounded by blood, visibly exhausted and utterly alone except for the little prince sleeping in her arms.
“I have a daughter. Miriel,” Fia said. “I’ve only been gone two days, and it’s…
it’s like a heartbreak that happens moment by moment, breath by breath.
She is always in my thoughts. But I make it my prayer that as often as I think of her, the Beloved Three will do so as well, and that she will be blessed by their kindness and their regard. ”
“Thank you.” The queen’s voice was faint, her eyes beginning to drift shut. “Oh, Fia, thank you for coming. I don’t think I’ve ever needed someone more. Will you be back, after you’ve finished with the Priest?”
Fia cursed Matria Dolenza inwardly, because as she looked at Ariana, a brief stab of the same protective anger she felt for Miriel rose up in her chest. Setting her jaw, she shook her head and pushed against her own nature. This was not what she’d left her old life for.
“I’m not sure,” Fia said reluctantly. “My daughter’s counting on me, so I don’t like to make any promises. You understand, don’t you?”
“Of course I do.”
But the words came out of the queen thin and hopeless, and Fia was forced to hurry away to hide how the sound of them pained her.