Chapter 50
The next morning, bleary-eyed and shattered, Jenni stepped into the reception of Go Big, now redecorated to reflect Clive’s latest cycling obsession, and tried to quell the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach.
She felt awful coming into work. What if Oscar came home while she was out and she wasn’t there?
Ben had said that he’d check her garden during the day in case he turned up, and that went some way to help her feel a little calmer.
After living on her own for so long, relying solely on herself, it felt strange to have someone be there for her again, and she was wary of getting too used to it. But, for now, it was nice to have someone who cared.
Approaching her desk, Tim, already sitting at his computer, looked up and, upon seeing her face, jumped to his feet to give her a hug.
‘Oh come here, love. It’s good to see you.’ He pulled away to look at her properly. ‘You look bloody awful!’
‘Cheers, Tim, that’s made me feel loads better.’ Jenni dumped her bag on the floor and pulled out her chair. ‘But you’re right. I look and feel terrible.’
‘Listen, I know you’re worried, but you need to look after yourself,’ he said gently, taking her hand.
‘Tell me what’s been going on.’
‘Well, he’s been missing for a week now, and I’m going out of my mind,’ she said, wearily.
‘And what about Ben?’
Jenni gave him a hard stare. ‘What about Ben? He’s just been helping me, that’s all.’
‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to be insensitive. It’s just, whenever I’ve called you, you’ve been with him. I just wondered if anything had happened between you, I mean.’ He leant forward, giving her hand a squeeze.
‘No, nothing has happened, but…’ she hesitated. ‘Well. I do like him. He’s been so kind and… I suppose under different circumstances…’ She trailed off, a shadow of regret passing over her face.
‘I know you’re really worried about Oscar, and Ben does sound like a nice guy, which is why he’s helping you, but are you sure there’s not something more there?
I just can’t believe he’d be putting so much effort into finding Oscar if he didn’t maybe have feelings for you too.
’ Tim raised a hand to stop her interrupting.
‘Look, I get it. You’re scared of getting hurt again, but for what it’s worth, I don’t think it’s just about a missing cat.
I think he likes you too. And I think you need to take a chance, just like I did when I met Paul. ’
‘Maybe, but you know, it’s so hard. What am I going to do if we don’t find Oscar?
How can I even be thinking about anything with Ben right now?
And anyway, what about everything we said to one another in the notes, before we knew one another?
It’s so complicated, Tim…’ She put her head in her hands.
‘Oh Jenni. Listen. I’m only saying this because I want you to be happy.’
She looked up as he continued.
‘It’s only as complicated as you want to make it.
You’ve met someone you like. He seems to like you too.
Okay, so the anonymous notes thing is a bit weird, perhaps, or maybe it’s just the most unusual meet-cute story you’ve ever heard.
Either way, you do have a choice. To be brave.
To look to your future and paint a different picture for yourself – maybe one with your dream house and Ben in it. ’
Jenni smiled. ‘That’s one of the most profoundly moving and emotionally intelligent things I’ve ever heard you say.’
‘I’m touched, but don’t try and change the subject.’
Jenni took a deep breath before repeating tentatively, and so quietly Tim almost didn’t hear her, ‘Okay. I’ll be brave.’