Four Arya #2
“But now they’re each their own little couples.” Farzan and David had been living together for over a year, Noah and his son had moved in with Ramin last month, and they were lucky to see each other once or maybe twice a week, if it was kickball season. Sometimes not even then.
If Arya and Ramin weren’t silent partners for Farzan’s restaurant, maybe they’d see each other even less. And what did that say about them, that business made them hang out?
They’d known each other since second grade.
They built Lego fortresses in each other’s basements.
They got pimples together. Survived being closeted and Iranian in high school after the September 11 attacks.
Came out in college, all within a couple weeks of each other, and then all at once when they caught up over summer break.
They used to be joined at the hip, and now?
Now Arya was here, chatting with another hookup, while his two best friends had found their people.
“I just don’t know,” Arya sighed. “I sound pathetic.”
“I’m sorry,” Ben said, bringing his other hand up to rest on Arya’s knee. Somehow they’d shifted so their knees were practically brushing. “And you don’t sound pathetic. That really sucks.”
“Thanks.” Arya rubbed his face. “God, I’m probably making them all sound like they abandoned me. You don’t know them, but they’re all good friends. Really. I just…”
“Hey. It’s fine. I get you.” Ben gave Arya’s knee a squeeze. The simple gesture had Arya’s chest tightening.
Fuck, this was getting… fraught. Yeah. Emotionally complicated.
Arya didn’t do emotionally complicated, not with his hookups. Not even with his friends! That’s what his therapist was for.
But it was like the floodgates had opened. Ben’s voice was so soothing, his smile so kind and calming, and as much as Arya wanted to get back into Ben’s pants, he wanted Ben to keep listening to him, too.
“I get it,” Ben said. “It’s weird. Your friends are moving one way, and you might be moving another, but it can still feel like you’re standing still.”
“Damn. That’s deep.” Arya smiled wryly. “Is this the wisdom of your forties?”
Ben laughed and swatted Arya with the throw pillow. “Brat. Respect your elders. Wait, you are younger than me, aren’t you?”
“I’ll turn forty in a couple months,” Arya groaned. “I’m not looking forward to it.”
Ben cocked his head. His silky hair flopped over his forehead. Arya wanted to reach over and brush it off. God, he was so tired he was acting drunk.
“What’s so bad about forty?”
“Aside from the joints popping? The soreness from the gym lasting twice as long? The gray nose hairs?”
Ben giggled, then tucked his face into his elbow for a quick yawn.
Arya yawned himself and said, “Gay forty is straight sixty.”
“I don’t think that’s true,” Ben said. “I mean… look at you.”
“Look at me?”
“You’re gorgeous.”
A tingle spread from Arya’s scalp all down his spine. He smiled and rested his head against the back of the love seat. “Well, you’re pretty hot yourself.”
It was Ben’s turn to smile. But Ben could smile. He was gorgeous.
Meanwhile, Arya meant what he said about the gray nose hair. And the increased recovery time. The popping in his joints.
The way his skin pooched in places it didn’t used to. The way his abs were slowly fading away no matter how he ate or what core workouts he did.
The way his sprint times were getting slower.
“It just sucks getting older.”
“I don’t know,” Ben said. “There’s some good parts.”
Arya couldn’t imagine what they were.
“Name one.”
“Getting more confident. I don’t know that I’d have broken up with Justin back when I was younger. I probably would’ve stayed and been unhappy.”
“You deserve someone who treats you well,” Arya pointed out. “Not treats you like shit. No matter your age.”
“I know, but it’s not so easy to believe that when you’re younger. I like being forty. I like who I am.” Ben shrugged. “I like you, too.”
“Yeah?” Arya trailed his fingers down Ben’s arm.
He yawned again, gave a little shiver. Ben pulled down a plush green throw and situated it over their legs.
Arya really should’ve been going. It was clear they weren’t going to fuck, they were too tired, but Arya wasn’t ready to leave yet.
He wanted to know everything about Ben. He’d never get another chance.
“What was it like growing up in a vineyard?”
Ben ran a hand through his hair. “Despite what everyone thinks, my parents didn’t give me wine when I was a child.”
Arya huffed a little laugh. Ben smiled wistfully.
“But they did let me help with the harvests. I don’t know if you can imagine, but some of the vines are pretty tall, and when you’re a kid they’re over your head, so…”
Arya blinked back awake. Shit, had he fallen asleep? He had the mother of all cricks in his neck. As he blinked away sleep, he saw Ben sitting across from him on the couch, cheek resting against his arm. He’d hurt in the morning, too, probably.
But he looked so sweet and peaceful there, Arya couldn’t bring himself to wake him.
Fuck, what was that supposed to mean? Arya didn’t do sweet and sentimental. What the fuck had he been thinking, spending all night talking? Falling asleep, even?
The hookup was over. Get in, get off, get out. That was the rule.
And shit, shit, shit, what time was it anyway? The sky outside the window was just lightening, from black to violet. Not sunrise yet.
Shit, shit, shit. He needed to get out of here.
Ben stirred slightly when Arya disentangled himself from the blankets, but then with a murmur he snuggled closer to the couch and stilled again.
Arya’s heart gave a weird twinge. Some part of him didn’t want to leave. He told that part to shut up. They didn’t have time for round two. Arya had a plane to catch.
Still, he tucked Ben back in. The night had gotten chilly. He might be a slut, but he wasn’t a total dick.
Arya snuck out as quietly as he could, only just barely remembering to avoid the step that creaked, pulled his shoes on, and let himself out of the house.
Behind the mountains to the east, dawn was creeping skyward. Arya’s phone was dead, but he was pretty sure he remembered how to get to the hotel. He hoped Carley wasn’t freaking out.
He glanced back one last time. Last night had been fun, but he needed to get back to the hotel.
Back to real life.