Chapter 7
Seven
Zephyr
After how much I'd struggled to make this decision, actually letting Nolan into my office so we could do this felt much easier.
I'd decided to wait until after breakfast because I knew Keoni wouldn't let me get away without eating, and while I'd barely tasted the food, eating first had been a good idea. I'd need all the energy I had for this.
I'd always known what was wrong with the Sanctuary, even if I hadn't been sure how to fix it until Nolan came around.
The Sanctuary—or rather, my pocket dimension, was powered by every single supe who lived here.
It was the only way to keep a pocket dimension as big as this one functioning smoothly.
Connecting it to multiple people also ensured that one person's weakness or strength wouldn't cause this place to fluctuate or stop working.
It had worked well for years, but that was because we'd only had supe members, and every resident contributed some magic toward the Sanctuary's upkeep.
While Touya had been the first human to move here, he had some magic in his blood, so it hadn't caused any issues. Channeling his magic into the Sanctuary had even allowed him to 'turn off' his powers, which helped him greatly.
But then came Bellamy, Dustin, Liam, and Diego. Four humans who had no magic to speak of.
The careful balance I'd maintained for years was thrown into disarray, and the only way I could balance it out was to pour more and more of my own magic in. But of course, that was a temporary fix because I wasn't strong enough to make up the difference while also performing my other duties.
I'd done everything I could to make up the difference.
I'd cut down on the number of exits so I'd have more magic to spare, I'd stopped looking for supes to rescue—those spells took both time and power I couldn't spare—and I'd even stopped using the little spells I'd spread around just for fun.
Spells that made the stars twinkle a little brighter, or caused breezes that spread the scent of flowers everywhere.
Nolan's arrival had been a big, glaring sign from Fate saying 'here's the solution to all your problems,' and it was only my past with him that had kept me from fixing the Sanctuary then and there.
I'd hesitated long enough, though. I couldn't let our past hold me back from doing what was best for my family any longer.
I closed my office door after Nolan, then led him to a wall cabinet that stood beside the door to my private quarters.
"When I first built this pocket dimension, I started with two rooms. This office, and my bedroom in there," I said, waving toward the closed door. "Metaphysically, this is the center of the pocket dimension. If these two rooms ever collapse..."
"The whole dimension will be destroyed," Nolan murmured in understanding.
I nodded, then opened the cabinet to reveal a bare wall.
"Uh..."
I bit back a smile at his confusion, then waved my palm over the wall, revealing a spell circle.
"Ah. It's the center, huh?" Nolan asked, and I nodded.
While the Sanctuary was built by many, many spells weaved together, this was the spell that connected them all.
This spell could channel magic to whichever spell needed it, and it kept the place running.
Whenever a new supe joined the Sanctuary, I added their magic to the dimension through this spell.
Nolan was the only one I hadn't done this for.
"Usually, it only takes about fifteen minutes to link a new supe to the spell," I explained as I turned to him, meeting his green eyes head-on.
I hadn't done that a lot, I realized. This man always raised such a jumbled mix of feelings in me.
I had no idea if I'd ever make sense of them, but for now, I pushed them to the back of my mind.
"But there are a lot of broken or malfunctioning spells right now, and if you don't mind, I was hoping we could fix them while we connect you. "
"I don't mind at all. It will be better to do it all at once anyway, right?"
I nodded, and he smiled, then rubbed his palms together. "Tell me what to do."
I placed my right palm on one side of the spell, and directed him to place his left on the other side. Then I took his other hand in mine, completing the circle.
"Oh wow. This is beautiful work, Zephyr," Nolan murmured, and I closed my eyes so I could see the spell as well.
I'd never figured out quite how to explain what I saw to someone who wasn't a sorcerer. Nolan could only see this because dragons were in a league of their own, but no one else in my family could.
The simplest way I could explain it was to compare it to one of Haruto's spiderwebs. The spells were all intricately woven together, thin threads of silk with a blue glow. Each spell had a different purpose that only I knew. Or maybe...
"Can you tell what each spell is for?" I asked, and Nolan hummed.
"I'm getting impressions, but nothing concrete. I can feel things like growth, balance, maintenance, beauty, and the like."
So that was still all mine. It probably shouldn't make me so happy.
Shaking my head, I directed Nolan to channel his magic into the right spells, and one by one the spells glowed red, then blue, then red, then blue again. They kept changing colors, pulsing like a vein, and I watched as they strengthened.
This was the right thing to do. For this place, for these people, for myself, even. Nolan's magic was exactly what we needed to bring the Sanctuary back to its former glory.
I wasn't sure how long it took to fix all the spells and link Nolan to the pocket dimension's core—he couldn't change the spells or add new ones, but he could now repair or make them stronger if needed—but by the time we were finished, a thin sheen of sweat coated my brows, though Nolan looked strong as ever.
Damn dragons and their practically bottomless magic.
The last thing we needed to do was lock everything in place, and when that happened, everything around us glowed red, then blue as the spells settled into place.
"Does it feel different to you?" Nolan asked, nodding toward the spell that was still visible on the wall.
"It does. It's more settled, like it used to be. Stronger too," I admitted reluctantly, and he smiled.
"That's good. Thank you for letting me assist."
Fuck, he really was a good guy, wasn't he? Thanking me when I should've been the one thanking him.
"No, thank you for helping. And I—I'm sorry. For holding the past against you."
Nolan's whole face seemed to soften somehow, and he clasped my shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. "You have nothing to apologize for, Zephyr. I wish I'd tried harder to find you. I wish I hadn't given up. You have every right to feel the way you do about me. I don't expect you to forgive me."
Of course he would say that, because he was just as good as I'd thought him to be when I'd approached him all those years ago. Wait, had he said...
"You looked for me? How long?"
Nolan blinked, then nodded. "I did. I searched for you for... a decade, I think. I stayed in the area, and I tried to find you. I didn't have much luck. I think I found the man you were running from, though. Or at least where he lived. Lord Fredrick?"
I flinched. It had been so long since I'd heard that name spoken by someone else.
"I'm assuming what happened to him was your doing," he said, voice low, and I nodded as the fingers of my left hand curled almost without my permission.
The metal arm was connected to my magic, and I had to think about every movement I wanted to make with it, but sometimes, it reacted to my emotions just like my right hand did.
"I hid here," I said with a laugh. "Well, not here technically. But I created a small pocket dimension. It was more like a large closet than anything, but no one could find me there. I snuck out to grab some food, but mostly I stayed there."
Nolan seemed to realize why he hadn't found me, and I wondered how things would've gone if I hadn't hidden. What would my life be like if Nolan had found me? If he'd taken me in?
Would the Sanctuary even exist?
"I'm sorry, Zephyr. For everything that happened to you, and the part I played in it."
I shook my head, pushing away the what-ifs that had started popping up in my mind. There was no use wondering about them. This was my life now, and it was a good one.
"No more apologies," I murmured, meeting Nolan's fierce green gaze.
Even in his human form, I could see traces of the fire dragon peeking through his eyes.
"Let's leave the past in the past and try to focus on the present, okay?
I know it's rich coming from me after the way I've treated you so far, but I'm tired of holding on to that anger.
It's pointless, and we have much better things to focus on. "
Nolan smiled, and I turned to the cabinet, waving my hand to hide the spell once more before closing the doors. From the outside, it just looked like a simple, dark wood cabinet, but it hid the very heart of this place.
"Place your palm on the other door," I directed, and Nolan did as I'd asked.
Using our combined magic, I weaved a new locking spell over the doors so Nolan could open it too.
"I don't think it will happen, but in case something goes wrong and I'm not around, you'll be able to access the core.
To reveal the spell, you just have to wave your palm over it and think 'reveal. '"
"Understood."
"Zephyr! Can I come in?" Keoni's voice made me jump, and I turned to the door as he knocked from the other side. How had I not heard him arrive?
"Should I let him in?" Nolan asked as I simply stood there, and I nodded. "I'll see you later, then."
He went to the door, opened it, and murmured something to Keoni before squeezing past him and leaving.
"I saw the lights. Does that mean it's fixed?" Keoni asked as he came closer, and I nodded.
"We'll have to wait a few days and see if everything stays stable, but I feel confident. The spells have never looked stronger."
Keoni beamed up at me, then threw his arms around me.
I froze in surprise, and it took me a few seconds to remember I should return his hug.
I wound my arms around him, holding him close, and he sighed against my chest. Despite being a centaur, Keoni had always been small, and he fit perfectly in my arms.
"I'm so glad! If the next few days go well, can we bring Khush and Dustin home?"
"Of course." I knew they wanted their child to be born here, and it had been one of the reasons I'd finally gotten over myself. I just hoped I hadn't been too late.
"Okay," Keoni said as he stepped back and glanced up at me. He searched my face, his lips pursed, then nodded to himself. "You need a nap."
"I'm fine," I protested, only for him to snort as he pushed the door to my bedroom open with one hand, and pulled me in after him with the other.
"Get in. Take a nap," he said, waving toward my unmade bed.
"I'm fine, Keoni," I repeated to no avail.
"Fine-schmine. The Sanctuary is finally fixed, and we can deal with everything else. You've been running yourself ragged for months, so you deserve a break. Hell, you deserve a long-ass vacation, but I know you too well, so I won't suggest that. You can manage a nap, can't you?"
"But—"
"If you don't get into bed and sleep, I'll stand here and make sure you do," he threatened, and I sighed. There was no fighting him when he went all stubborn like this, so I removed my shoes and slid under the covers.
"Your arm—"
"It's okay," I said before he could finish his sentence. Sleeping with my arm attached wasn't comfortable, but removing it in front of Keoni... I wasn't ready for that either.
Keoni didn't look happy, but didn't push, probably because he knew exactly how I felt.
He waited for a beat, then said, "I'll come fetch you at lunchtime. I want to find you right here in bed, okay?"
"Yes, Keoni."
"Good."
He left the room, and I waited until the clatter of his cart faded away before removing my arm with a click. The arm was a masterpiece, Draven's finest work, and yet I could never love it. It—or rather, the lack of my real arm—was a constant reminder of the day I lost Rei.
I placed the arm on the nightstand, then closed my eyes.
Surprisingly, I fell asleep in minutes.