Chapter Twenty-Five Krish
We stay on the elevated platform until the soldiers leave and most of the lights of the station go dark.
It is a strange feeling to look into the sky and know that our home planet is somewhere far beyond what I can see.
I expect to feel sadness or longing, but instead all I feel is a sense of being disconnected.
It feels like a lifetime ago that my brood brothers and I were hunting serrex before our capture.
It is hard to reconcile that quiet life in the wilderness with the noise and activity of the base.
Zann is uncharacteristically quiet as we make our way back to our chambers. I strip my clothes and crawl into the nest, curling against Davix. I am about to close my eyes when I hear Zann speak.
“There is something I must discuss with you,” Zann says, he crawls into the nest and sits facing Davix and me.
Despite his statement, he is silent for a moment.
“Corrina says that there is a chance that we could return to Gyria if we wish,” he finally murmurs.
“It would take time before she could arrange it, but she thinks she can get us home.”
I stare at him in surprise. “When did she tell you this?” I ask, wondering if Zann has been keeping things from us. Though he is our leader, he has always sought our thoughts and opinions before.
“Only yesterday,” Zann replies. “I told her that I would speak with you about it.”
“What is there to speak about?” Davix signs, sitting up in the nest. “Why wouldn’t we go home?”
“If we go back to Gyria, we will not ever be able to return here. To Kapoor Base. To our new friends,” Zann explains.
I frown. I have grown used to the company of others, and I am not immediately eager to return to a life where my only companions are my brood brothers.
Besides, we have barely even begun to explore the large station and there are many places I wish to visit and things I wish to do. “When do we have to leave?” I ask.
Zann glances at me and then Davix. “I asked what would happen if we wanted to stay. Corrina thinks there is a way for us to do that. If it is what we all want.”
“You want to stay here?” Davix signs.
“I think I do not want to return to Gyria. The idea of not seeing Corrina again makes me,” Zann pauses as if searching for the right word, “unsettled.”
I nod. Not seeing Corrina for the few days when we were ‘laying low’ as Curran suggested filled me with a strange emptiness. It brought me joy to spend time with her today in a way that is different from spending time with Wenschel or Ryder. I want to do more of it.
I glance at Davix, who appears to be deep in thought. “It is frustrating to be here,” he finally signs, “with so many others when I cannot communicate.”
“Corrina wants to learn our hand language,” Zann offers. “Perhaps others will want to learn as well. Wenschel is very curious about many things.”
I wait for Davix to respond, but his hands drop into his lap and stay there. “We should at least learn more about what it means if we are able to stay,” I finally say. “Unless we have to decide right away.”
Zann shakes his head. “Corrina says there is no rush to decide. But I will see if I, if we, can speak to her more about this.”
Davix nods his head and lies back down in the nest, closing his eyes.
I curl against him, resting my head against his chest, and Zann curls up with his head on my stomach.
The feel of their bodies in our nest is comfortable and familiar, but as I drift off to sleep I cannot help but think that it would be pleasant to have Corrina here with us as well.
We do not have a chance to see Corrina until the midday meal the following day. She is sitting at a table with Curran, frowning as he speaks to her in a low, anxious voice. “I’m just saying you shouldn’t take risks,” he is saying.
“And I am telling you that I am not going to hide away in my office because some asshole is,” Corrina stops speaking suddenly as she notices my presence. “Hello, Krish,” she says, and Curran glances up in surprise.
I set my tray down on the table and sit next to her. Davix and Zann join us a moment later. “I am sorry if we interrupted your conversation,” I say, but Corrina waves her hand dismissively.
“It’s fine,” she says firmly. “Just discussing station business.”
“And we will be finishing our conversation later,” Curran says pointedly before glancing at me. “Heard you had a fun day yesterday.”
I grin widely. If the sight of my fangs bothers Curran or Corrina, they do not show it. In fact, Corrina grins at me in response. “It was a very good day,” I say. “I am looking forward to the next time Corrina has a day off so that we can do more things together.”
“Already penciling yourself in for her days off, huh?” Curran asks. He raises an eyebrow and stares at me. I do not understand what his words mean, but if penciling myself in means that I want to spend more time with her then I would agree.
“Leave it, Curran” Corrina says.
“We spoke last night about the possibility of staying here,” Zann says, interrupting whatever Curran was going to say in return. “We would like to know more.”
“Staying?” Curran asks. “I thought you were looking into ways to get them back to Gyria.”
“I was,” Corrina replies. “But Zann asked if it would be possible for them to stay here, so now I’m looking into that too. Although technically, Liu is looking into both options for me.”
“Huh,” Curran says. I look at him, expecting him to say something else, but he just stares at Corrina and takes a bite of his food.
“Anyway,” Corrina says. “If you are interested in staying here, then you will need to find jobs. You’ll need to be able to earn credits to pay for your own food and a place to live and whatever else you might want or need.”
“Davix is an excellent tracker and scout,” I offer. “He led many patrols before we were banished from the city.”
“Banished?” Curran asks.
Zann nods. “It is customary for males who can no longer produce young to be banished from the city,” he offers. “Competition for females can be intense, and it is better for breeding males to not have to worry about a female being interested in an infertile male.”
“And what happens to females when they are no longer fertile?” Corrina asks. She and Curran are staring at Zann intently.
“They die,” Zann says quietly.
“They what?” both Curran and Corrina say at once.
“When female fertility begins to decline, more and more of their energy is devoted to producing young. Eventually, they die while laying their final clutch. Some females survive briefly after they lay their last egg, but most do not.”
Both humans stare at Zann for several minutes. “Stars and planets, you haleens suck all the fun out of sex,” he mutters.
“Curran!” Corrina exclaims.
“I’ve got to go,” Curran grumbles as he stands and stalks away from the table.
“Have I said something wrong?” Zann asks. “Have I made Curran angry?”
Corrina sighs. “It can just be a touchy subject,” she says softly.
“Curran’s family wasn’t happy when they learned that he doesn’t like women sexually.
They were even more upset when they found out he wasn’t willing to find a woman to get pregnant just to carry on the family name.
” She is still staring at the doorway where Curran left.
“Yuva never wanted children, and Curran wasn’t about to saddle the love of his life with an unwanted child for the sake of making his parents happy. ”
“Our species are very different when it comes to procreation,” I say honestly.
“Yes, that much is clear,” Corrina says.
She shakes her head and lets out a sigh.
“But we were talking about jobs. Are there other skills you already have besides Davix being a scout and tracker? Would you have interest in becoming soldiers like us?” she gestures to herself and the surrounding humans.
“Or would you prefer to find jobs out in Azuris?”
“Would being a soldier mean we could stay in the base and be closer to you?” I ask.
“Um, yes,” Corrina says hesitantly. “Though fraternization, being too friendly, isn’t encouraged between a commander and his or her soldiers.”
“This is exhausting,” Davix signs. “How can humans value relationships so much and then have so many rules to prevent them?”
“I do not know,” Zann says honestly to him. “What is the option that allows us to be friends and spend time together and still stay here?”
“There’s really not an option to live on base unless you have a family member who is enlisted. But you could certainly live and work in Azuris somewhere close to the base so we could still see each other.”
“That is acceptable,” I say, glancing to Zann and Davix for confirmation. “How do we find jobs and a place to live?”
“Let’s finish eating and then go talk to Ensign Liu. I have some ideas and may have some connections, but I’ll need him to track down details.”