Chapter 5 Best Weekend Of My Life
Best Weekend Of My Life
Kai to Carina: Does she ever shut up? [delivered]
Tess
“Can we stop by Carina’s on the way back to mine today?” I ask Kai while munching on some toast in the morning.
He shrugs, not looking up from his phone. “Sure.”
“Is there anything else we need to do other than the carpet?”
He sets the phone down, looking far too casual. “Nope. I scrubbed the CCTV footage from last night, so no one can trace us to the pig farm. Oh, and I also made sure it doesn’t look like your boyfriend was ever at your flat the other night.”
Oh wow. I hadn’t even considered that. “Oh my god, how do I explain his disappearance?”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ve taken care of it. Created a narrative.”
“Fancy sharing?”
Kai sighs, rubbing the back of his neck like he’s already tired of this conversation.
“Fine. If you must know, your boyfriend”—he says the word as if it tastes bad—“had a gambling problem. I’ve planted just enough breadcrumbs to make it look like he skipped town to avoid some very angry debt collectors. ”
I pause mid-chew, staring at him. “Gambling problem? He didn’t even play cards.”
“Doesn’t matter,” Kai says, waving a hand dismissively.
“The key to a good cover story isn’t truth; it’s believability.
I hacked into his bank records and added a few questionable transactions—online poker, dodgy loan repayments.
Then I set his phone to ping near a bus station on its way out of town before it went dark.
It’ll look like he ran off when things got too hot. ”
I blink at him. “When did you have time to do this?”
“I’m efficient.”
“You’re terrifying.”
“Thank you,” he says with a mock bow, a rare moment of playfulness. “Now, eat your toast and try not to look guilty. You’re supposed to be the devastated girlfriend.”
“Got it,” I mutter, though I can’t help but wonder just how many other times Kai has pulled off something like this.
By the time we get to Carina’s it's a little after midday, the sun is high in the sky, and I’m sweating like a pig. Ironic.
I had to fight for space against the massive carpet taking up room in Kai’s car. I’m not sure when he even had time to buy it, let alone the ability to put it in the car all before I woke up. Did he even go to sleep?
The front door opens before we have a chance to knock.
Nate stands on the other side grinning. “There’s our little murderer.” Kill me now. “Come in, I should warn you though, Cupcake is a little feral today.”
As he says it a blond cockapoo puppy, with adorable ringlet curls, comes sprinting towards us with Carina hot on its heels. She wrestles the little thing into her arms before pulling me into a hug.
Kai and I share a bemused look before heading inside.
I’ve been to their place a few times over the past year, so I make myself comfortable on their sofa.
They had a different house when I first got reacquainted with Carina but sold it not long after and now, they live in a two-bedroom house—still in Kensington, the rich fuckers—that has a quirky mix of both their personalities.
The sofas are cream—like my singular one—but are scattered with cushions in various shades of pink. The walls are painted in neutral grey, something that I know was Nate’s doing.
They have various pieces of abstract art on the walls. They're like—proper functioning adults. Unlike me who thinks that my one photo frame is doing enough to make my flat homey—it’s just the frame with the stock image that came with it still inside.
Carina comes to sit next to me, and Cupcake immediately wiggles out of her arms and settles in my lap. Kai and Nate sit opposite us in the armchairs. Two sofas and two armchairs! Where did I go wrong?
No one speaks for a moment until I break the silence. “So… anyone want to tell me about their spare time hobbies that require Kai here to ‘clean’ things?”
The three of them exchange a glance—silent communication passing between them—before Carina takes the lead. “Look, if I tell you about this it has to stay in this room.” She waits for me to nod before continuing. “Nate and I take down evil men—”
“—and women,” Nate interjects smoothly. “We’re equal-opportunity justice dealers.”
Carina shoots him a glare before continuing. “As I was saying, we take down evil people, and Kai here cleans up the mess. Makes it all pretty, like we were never there.”
“The fuck?”
“That’s how we met actually,” Nate says with a wistful smile as if he’s remembering the exact moment. “There I was, ready to kill some paedo, and this pink princess stole him from under me.”
I study each of them with my eyes, trying to work out if they’re fucking with me but they’re dead serious.
“So… you’re murderers?”
“We prefer the term artists. But yes, you could say that,” Nate says with a smug expression.
“We’re only telling you this because I knew you had questions.” Carina places her hand over mine.
This is probably around about the time for me to start freaking out. I mean… my best friend and her boyfriend just admitted to murdering people. I should be running out of here screaming.
But I don’t feel unsafe. I don’t think they kill everyone. Maybe it’s naive of me but I get the feeling they’re more like vigilante’s than straight up serial killers.
“Alright. Cool. Cool. Cool.”
“What happened with Jake, Tess?” Carina asks, changing the subject and reminding me of my own killer status.
“It was kill or be killed,” I shrug like it’s no big deal.
I know that one day this will probably all catch up to me. But I don’t feel bad for what I did.
Nate and Kai are chatting on the other side of the room, and, to my utter disbelief, Kai’s face actually lights up. He looks... happy. Relaxed, even. And is that laughing?
“When did you decide to get a dog?” Kai asks, leaning against the cushions.
“About two weeks into the relationship,” Nate says, grinning. “But Carina made me wait. Said I needed to prove I was responsible enough for both her and the dog.”
Kai rolls his eyes. “Cupcake is a dumb name.”
Nate gasps, clutching his chest like he’s been mortally wounded. “How dare you insult my fur child!”
“It’s a boy!” Kai shoots back, exasperated.
“And?” Nate arches an eyebrow in offense. “Are you saying boys can’t have feminine names, Kai Matthews?”
Kai holds his hands up in surrender. “Oh no. We are not doing this.”
I’m still processing the sight of Kai—grumpy, antisocial Kai—bantering like a normal person when his eyes suddenly meet mine. His laughter fades as he catches my open-mouthed stare.
“What?” he asks, sounding defensive.
“Who are you,” I say slowly, “and what have you done with grumpy Kai?”
Nate snorts, clearly enjoying himself. “Ah, don’t worry, Tess. He was pretty quiet with Carina at first, too. You have to grow on him. Like mould. Once he realises you’re not going anywhere, he starts to mellow out.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” I mutter, crossing my arms and trying not to smile.
Kai shakes his head, muttering under his breath. “This is why I work alone.”
“You literally work with me!” Nate accuses, pouting.
Kai just rolls his eyes. “Right. And just how much of the cleaning do you do?”
Nate’s lips press into a line as he tries to fight a smirk. “Some.”
Kai crosses his arms. “I work alone.”
“Sure. Whatever you think.”
Kai
Tess is unusually quiet on the drive back to her place after leaving Nate’s. Too quiet.
I glance at her every few seconds, but she’s staring out the window like it holds the answers to every question she’s ever had.
Normally, I’d revel in the quiet. It’s what I’m used to. But… something isn’t right.
“You good?” I ask, hating myself for caring.
“Huh?” She blinks, turning her gaze toward me. “Yeah. I’m good.”
I should leave it there. Enjoy the rare, blissful silence she’s gifted me for once. But something about the way her voice wavers makes me push.
“You know you can talk to me, right? If you want.”
She shifts in her seat, angling toward me. Her green eyes glimmer with something softer, heavier than usual. “It’s just… I’m going to miss this. Hanging out with you.”
That’s not what I expected her to say.
“I mean,” she continues, fidgeting with the hem of her top, “tomorrow I’ll go back to my normal life.
Back to work, smiling at people as I answer phones like I’m not a totally different person.
Like I’m not a murderer. Meanwhile, you’ll keep doing whatever it is you do with dead bodies, and I’ll probably never see you again.
Which is fine. Totally fine. I shouldn’t care because, let’s be honest, I’m not even sure you like me.
And I’m not even sure I like you. But this weekend?
This insane, completely deranged weekend?
It’s been… kind of the best weekend of my life.
And I don’t know what to do with that because—”
“Tess.”
She ignores me.
Her words tumble out faster, her eyes brimming with too many emotions, too many unanswered questions. It’s too much, and something snaps in me.
“—I feel alive for once, which is ironic considering it all started with me unaliving Jake, and now—”
I slam on the brakes outside her building, my breath coming faster. Without thinking, I grab the back of her head, pulling her toward me, needing to silence all the chaos that’s building between us. The kiss comes before either of us can stop it.
Her words vanish, replaced by a soft gasp against my lips.
For a second, she freezes—shocked, uncertain—but then she melts against me, her body pressing into mine.
Her fingers fist my shirt, pulling me closer, and I can feel the tremble in her fingertips.
I deepen the kiss, feeling her warmth seep into me.
She tastes like mint, her breath mingling with mine, and I’m caught in the chaos of it.
The world outside disappears, just the two of us, tangled together in the tension that’s been building between us for the past few days.
It’s wild, uncontrollable, and I’m lost in it.
I nip her bottom lip, earning a soft moan that sends heat straight through me, but also jolts me back to reality. Ripping my mouth from hers, my chest heaves. Fuck. Stupid. So fucking stupid.
“What… what was that for?” she breathes, her voice shaky. There’s something fragile in her gaze as she looks at me, like she’s trying to make sense of what just happened.
“To shut you up,” I deadpan.
She blinks, then laughs, the sound bright and unexpected. “You’re an ass.”
“And you talk too much.”
I clear my throat, trying to shake off the feel of her lips. “Sorry I shouldn’t have done that.”
Tess shakes her head. “Right. Yeah.”
Desperate to break the tension I nudge her shoulder lightly. “Come on. Help me carry the carpet inside.”
I climb out of the car, and she does the same. Neither of us speaks as we lug the carpet up the stairs and towards her door.
Just as we round the corner, I stop dead at the sight of her door off its hinges.
“What—” Tess starts from behind me.
“Shh,” I hiss. “Put the carpet down.” I keep my voice low but calm in an attempt not to spook her too much.
“Kai, what’s going on?” She asks with a slight tremor to her voice.
“Someone has broken into your flat. Wait here while I check it out.”
She looks up at me, her eyes wide with panic, her lips parting to speak. I don’t let her. Instead, I cup the back of her head, pulling her mouth to mine. The kiss is brief, just enough to silence her spiralling thoughts.
When I pull back, her gaze locks on mine, her breath hitching.
I step back once again. “Fuck. Sorry I don’t know why I keep doing that.”
“It’s a pretty effective method of shutting me up,” she offers, shrugging her shoulders.
“It is, isn’t it?”
Her cheeks turn red.
“I’ll be right back,” I say firmly, my voice steady despite the adrenaline coursing through me.
She nods, her cheeks flushed, the fear still evident in her eyes.
I reach into my pocket, pulling out the switchblade I always carry for emergencies.
The cold metal is solid in my grip. I’m not a fan of violence, but that doesn’t mean I can’t handle myself when it matters.
You don’t have a best friend that’s a serial killer without knowing how to use a knife. Just in case.
The door is a mess, barely hanging on its hinges, the wood splintered and jagged where it’s been kicked in. My gut tightens as I step inside. The flat is a disaster.
It wasn’t exactly pristine before, but now it’s pure chaos. Overturned furniture clutters the small living room, and in the kitchenette, broken glass and shattered crockery crunch under my trainers. Drawers hang open, their contents scattered across the floor.
Moving cautiously toward her bedroom, I push the door open with my blade ready. The destruction continues—clothes tossed everywhere; the bedding ripped from the mattress and left in a heap.
I sweep the bathroom, heart pounding as I brace for something—or someone—lurking in the shadows. But it’s empty.
Releasing a tense breath, I step back into the hallway. She’s still standing exactly where I left her, her arms crossed tightly over her chest, fear etched into her face.
“It’s clear,” I tell her. “But… it’s bad.”
I barely finish before she’s pushing past me, bolting into the flat. Her movements are frantic until she freezes in the middle of the carnage.
“Oh my god.”
Her voice is barely above a whisper, but the tremble in it cuts through me.
I watch her as she takes it all in, her hands covering her mouth like she’s trying to hold back a scream. The sight of her standing amidst the wreckage makes my chest tighten, and I grip the knife harder, silently cursing whoever did this.
“Tess?”
Her eyes find mine just as tears pool in them. It cracks my resolve.
In one quick stride, I’m by her side, pulling her into my arms. The tension in my chest tightens as I feel her tremble against me. I stroke her hair, trying to offer her some comfort, but the anger and fear claw at me. Someone hurt her, someone made her feel this way, and I can’t stand it.
“Who would do this?” she whispers, voice wavering.
“I don’t know,” I say, trying to keep my voice soft. “But I’ll find out.”