Chapter 23
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Humphrey and I were stood at the bottom of the hill as Ben and Rosie hurtled down it. Rosie was sat in front of her father shrieking, ‘Faster, Daddy,’ and Ben was sat behind her looking pensive whilst trying to control their sledge. He safely brought the sledge to a stop at the bottom and Rosie leapt out. ‘Did you see me go fast, Humph-Wee?’
‘Rachel, I think it’s your turn,’ Ben said, striding through the fresh snow which had arrived overnight. ‘I want to see your sledging speed-demon skills.’
Handing him Humphrey’s lead, I grabbed the red plastic sledge he’d found for me. ‘Watch and learn.’ I gave him a cocky wink and he laughed.
It had been some years since I had been on a sledge. I trudged up the hill and wondered whether I would feel the same levels of crazy excitement as I did when I was a child. On top of the hill, they came rushing back. With a huge grin on my face, I jumped on the sledge and whizzed down the hill. It was fantastic to get a rush of excitement. Ben and Rosie clapped and cheered as I brought the sledge to a dramatic stop in a snow drift. I was laughing so much I didn’t care about how much snow I was coated in.
‘Wow, that was impressive,’ exclaimed Ben. ‘You really are a speed demon.’
‘You better watch out.’
We took turns to go down the hill. I kept an eye on Rosie and Humphrey whilst Ben showed me what he called his sledging moves. Rosie and I were not impressed and laughed as we turned down our thumbs at his performance. I had another go on my own and Rosie gave me an instant thumbs up. She turned to her father. ‘Can I go down with Rachel?’
He nodded and I raced after Rosie who was giggling her way up to the top. She let me put my arms around her and warm tingles shot up my spine. I made sure I took a slower route down the hill, but Rosie still enjoyed herself.
After a few more turns, we were all pink-faced and weary. ‘Do you fancy going for a coffee?’ Ben asked as we trudged back to his van. ‘Mum says I can drop Rosie back at the cottage as they are doing some Christmas baking.’
I smiled at him, and he held my gaze. ‘I’d like that.’
Rosie tugged on my coat. ‘Can Humph-Wee stay with me and Nana?’
Ben looked to me for approval before agreeing. ‘As long as you keep him in the kitchen and make sure he doesn’t escape.’
Rosie nodded. ‘He will be a good boy.’
Once we’d dropped Rosie and an excited Humphrey off, Ben drove to a farm shop and café a few miles out of Harp Brook. Luckily the main road out of the village had been gritted overnight.
We took our seats as our drinks were being made for us.
‘Ben, this morning was a lot of fun. Thanks for inviting me.’ Sitting near him over a little table, staring into his eyes and thinking about those large hands of his filled my chest with that familiar fluttering sensation.
A cheeky boyish smile swept across his face, and I had to stop myself from reaching out to skim his cheeks with my fingers. He said, ‘I think the next time we go sledging, it should just be me and you.’
I grinned. ‘You want a race?’
He nodded. ‘Sure do. I want to race the speed demon.’
A waitress brought our coffees. Ben stirred in a cube of sugar. He lifted his face to mine. ‘I want to know more about you, Rachel.’
‘There’s not a lot to tell,’ I said, with a chuckle. ‘I was made redundant earlier this year and have struggled to get another job, so I have been busy collecting interview rejection emails. My flat ceiling is leaking so when I have not been reading an email which starts with, “Thanks for applying for this role…” and ends with “but no thanks”, I have also been collecting buckets of water.’
He smiled at my sarcasm. ‘Your life is going well then?’
I laughed. ‘Amazing.’
After taking a sip of his coffee, he put his hands flat on the table. ‘Look, I have a confession to make.’
‘A confession?’ My voice crackled.
His eyes held mine for far longer than necessary. ‘I think we’ve met before.’
‘Ben, I don’t think we’ve met before.’
He took a deep breath. ‘Perhaps the word, met, is misleading.’ His fingers nervously tapped the table. ‘Earlier this year an old friend of mine tried to set me up…’
I knew what he was going to say. Oh God, he was Olivia’s friend from uni. It was Ben. ‘You’re Olivia’s friend – aren’t you?’
He nodded and I noticed his eyes had become watery. ‘She… ummm…’
Instinctively I reached out and touched his hand. ‘I know, Ben. Olivia was my flatmate and one of my best mates.’ Tears rushed to my eyes and spilt down my cheeks. ‘I miss her so much, Ben.’
Within seconds he was up from his seat and pulling me into his strong arms. I pressed my face into his shoulder and sobbed. His hug eased some of the pain inside my chest. When I eventually looked up, I saw that his cheeks and eyes were damp. He let me go and we returned to our seats, looking a little awkward.
He spoke first. ‘Olivia sent me a photo of you and her. I didn’t recognise you until we were stood on the steps to the house.’
‘I didn’t see you at her funeral.’ I rummaged around for a tissue in my coat pocket.
From his coat he gave me an unopened packet of tissues. ‘Rosie broke her arm doing gymnastics. I couldn’t leave her.’
I nodded and then gasped. ‘You emailed me and I…’
‘Ghosted me,’ he chuckled.
We both laughed. ‘I’m sorry for ghosting you, Ben.’
He shrugged. ‘It wasn’t my finest dating email. Even Olivia told me it was crap.’
‘Now that sounds like Olivia. So, you met her at uni – right?’
‘Sophie… ummmm…. who gave birth to Rosie and…’
‘Ben, I know about Sophie, Olivia told me.’
Relief swept across his face. ‘Well, Sophie and Olivia met in halls at uni, and I dated Sophie. We all became good friends. Olivia was there for me when they told us Sophie’s tumour had spread and she was with me and Sophie at the end. Rosie was a baby, and I was a mess.’
‘I’m sorry, Ben.’
‘Sonia called me to tell me about Olivia. It was an awful day.’ He rubbed his neck. ‘I miss her messages, her flying visits to see us and her friendship.’ He smiled. ‘I do know that heaven will have got a lot louder with both Sophie and Olivia up there. How are you doing?’
‘Me? Well, coming here has made me see how much of a mess I have been since she left us. What I do know is that life must go on, but I will never forget her.’
He smiled at me, and I found myself wanting to be in his arms again. ‘How do you fancy coming out for dinner with me on Sunday, Rachel?’
I wanted to say yes but then I remembered the nativity scenery. Sunday evening would be spent adding the finishing touches. ‘I’ve agreed to paint the scenery for the primary school nativity play and on Sunday evening I’ll be finishing it off.’
Ben leaned back in his chair. ‘I’ll bring dinner to you in the school hall on Sunday evening then.’ He smiled and held my gaze.