Chapter 10 #2
‘I’m sorry, Mia, I wasn’t trying to lie to you, I just…’
‘That’s a conversation for another time.
’ She cut him off. ‘But clinically, Aiden, it would have been really helpful to know the patient I’m supposed to be stitching up is experiencing chorea spasms. I’m not a paramedic.
I’m not licensed to carry paralytics like they are.
I don’t even know which would work. She should be in hospital.
’ She climbed out of the car, slamming the door as she went to the rear.
‘Mia, I really am sorry.’
‘And I’m busy trying to figure out how to help a patient you dropped on me under false pretences.’ Angrily, she emptied the contents of a bag she rarely used all over the floor, hoping what she thought might work was in there.
‘Mia, I’m sorry.’
Finally her fingers landed on the tube she was looking for. ‘I don’t want to talk about it. I’m busy.’ She slammed the car shut for good measure. ‘And you’re going to help. Come on.’ She stomped back to the kitchen.
‘Rightio, Sylvie.’ Mia smiled at his ma like she hadn’t just been tearing him a new – probably well-deserved – hole, and he was so grateful to her for that.
‘Now I’ve got a better understanding of what’s going on, I’ve got an idea.
It’s not going to be fun for any of us, and I can’t promise it’ll work or be particularly neat, but it’s this or the hospital. ’
‘OK.’ His ma barely flinched as Mia uncovered her hand again.
‘I’m going to have to check for any bits of glass that might be left, clean you up and then I’m going to try and glue this wound shut.
And I need you to be as still as possible while I do that.
I know that’s not easy for you. So, we can either wait this episode out and hope your meds kick in soon – which isn’t ideal – or we put your boy’s muscles to use and he helps you hold still while I work. What do you think?’
‘Do you mind, love?’
Did he mind? Of course he fucking minded pinning his ma to the table like an animal or misbehaving child. Just the thought of it churned his stomach. But what could he possibly say when they were both looking at him like that? He forced the bile back down his throat. ‘Of course not. What do I do?’
‘Come behind Sylvie here? One hand on her wrist, and the other over her fingers like this.’ She demonstrated on her own hand. ‘I’ll pad her hand, but you need to keep the pressure even to make sure we don’t cause any other injuries.’
Aiden nodded, feeling even sicker.
‘I don’t suppose you’ve got surgical gloves? Mine won’t fit you.’
He shook his head, making a mental note to get some, and went to scrub his hands.
‘You’re sure you’re OK with this?’ Mia tucked padding around his ma’s hand.
She nodded stiffly. ‘Been feeding him all these years. Might as well get some use out of him.’
‘Wonderful. I love it when my patients have a sense of humour. You heard your ma, Aiden. Come make yourself useful. And Sylvie, you’re going to tell us – immediately – if this gets too much for you.’
He slid into position, following the instructions, and trying to act a lot calmer than he felt.
Every instinct he had was screaming against what he was doing – but he trusted Mia, so he pinned his ma’s hand to the table and let her turn her head against his shoulder.
He locked his jaw, clenched his teeth firmly together and forced himself to take calm, slow breaths.
Mia worked quickly and skilfully, cleaning out his ma’s hand with gentle, precise movements then flushing it over a basin.
But as quickly as she worked, it still took far, far too long, and he hated every second of feeling his ma tense and twist against him as her body fought his grasp and her own instructions.
‘OK, I think we’re nearly there. I’m happy everything is clean now.’ Mia carefully dabbed at his ma’s hand. ‘Just need to close the wound. Are you doing all right, Sylvie, or do you want a quick break?’
‘I’m OK. Just want this over with.’
‘I don’t blame you one bit,’ Mia sympathised. ‘Now, the good news is I’ve got skin glue here, so it’ll only take a few seconds. Bad news, though, is some people say it burns a little when applied, and I will have to pinch your skin together. Sure you’re ready?’
‘Ready.’
‘OK, really still for this bit, please, otherwise we’re all going to have to become good friends because we’ll be stuck together for days.’
His ma chuckled at Mia’s small joke, and Aiden was hit by a wave of gratitude for her kindness. She really was far, far too good for him.
Finally, Mia breathed a sigh of relief. ‘We’re done. You can let go, Aiden. Gently.’
He nodded, needing to swallow hard before he could speak.
‘I, um, I’m just going to get some fresh air.
’ He made it to the end of the garden before his stomach stopped listening to logic and reason and rebelled against the last ten minutes.
He spat afterwards, and took a couple of seconds to catch his breath – before forcing a smile and heading back into the kitchen.
‘Hey, how’s it going?’
‘We’re good.’ Mia smiled, but Aiden couldn’t help but notice the expression didn’t meet her eyes.
‘It looks like our hard work has paid off, and there’s not been any more bleeding.
Sylvie, you’ll have to go easy with your hand for the next couple of days, and make sure you keep it dry – so no washing up for you!
You’ll need dressings changed tomorrow, but other than that you should be fine.
Obviously if there’s any more bleeding, or signs of infection – you know what those are?
’ She waited for the nod. ‘Then you’ll have to see your doctor or go to urgent care. ’
‘But you’re done with me?’ Sylvie asked.
‘Yes.’
‘Then would you think me terribly rude if I just said thank you, and it was nice to meet you, but I really need to go to bed?’
‘Not rude at all.’ Mia smiled at his ma – a far more genuine expression than the one he got. ‘And it was nice meeting you too. Although perhaps a little more dramatic than I’d have chosen.’
Aiden helped his ma stand.
‘You should come and have tea with us one day soon. Aiden’s a very good baker. Did you know that?’
‘I’ve tried some of his biscuits.’ Mia nodded. ‘He’s very talented.’
It was impossible to ignore that she’d side-stepped the invitation, but at least she hadn’t brought up their argument.
He had no idea what he was supposed to say to her, so concentrated on helping his ma up the stairs safely and with as much getting ready for bed as she’d allow before shooing him away.
He trudged back down the stairs, and found Mia on her hands and knees, cleaning up blood.
‘Mia, stop. You don’t have to do that.’
‘It’s fine.’
‘You’ve already done so much.’
‘All part of the service.’ She disposed of the cloth she’d been using and reached for another. ‘I mean, if it were vomit, I might have been more tempted to leave you to it.’
‘Right. You hate vomit.’
‘Yeah. But blood doesn’t bother me. I’m not sure you could say the same. Are you OK?’
‘Yeah.’ He knelt by her. ‘And it wasn’t the blood.’
‘Oh.’
‘Can I help?’
‘I’m basically done. Just need to disinfect the sink and table. Yellow bottle. Spray then leave to dry.’
He grabbed the bottle and sprayed the table, then the floor, while she chucked her gloves and scrubbed her hands. When she was done, he sprayed the sink.
‘Can I make you a drink or anything?’
‘I’m actually really tired. I need to go home and sleep.’
‘Of course.’ He watched as she gathered her things.
‘Walk me out? You’ll need more dressings for Sylvie’s hand. I think I have spares.’
‘That would be good, thank you.’ He followed her, feeling a huge chasm between them, but not knowing what to say to fix it.
The half-formed tattoo burned across his shoulder – a warning he didn’t know how to respond to.
Instead, he watched helplessly as she sorted through the mess she’d created in her car, dumping things back into a bag until she found what she needed.
‘Here. It’s pretty self-explanatory.’
‘Thank you. For these… for tonight.’
‘Glad I could help.’ Her response sounded rote and so unlike her that he wanted to grab her and shake her, or tickle her, even kiss her… anything to get a reaction that was more like her usual sunny, teasing self – but he knew he had no right to.
‘Mia, I really am sorry, and incredibly grateful for what you did tonight. I know you’re pissed off with me, but would you please message me when you get home? Just so I know you’re safe.’
‘Sure.’ She hesitated, her hand resting on the open door.
‘I’m not angry, Aiden, not exactly.’ When she looked up at him, the hurt in her eyes was so raw that he almost wished she hadn’t.
‘Actually, that’s a lie. I’m furious. But I think I’m more disappointed.
I clearly misunderstood our relationship…
I know Friday nights were never serious or anything real, but I’d thought our friendship was.
You told me I could trust you, and I did.
But you’ve been holding back and lying all along.
You put me in a bad position professionally because you didn’t trust me as a friend.
Got to admit, that feels pretty shitty. You know how I feel about people – especially men – lying to me.
I’d thought we were real, proper friends, beneath whatever else we were.
But don’t worry, you’ve dissuaded me of that very effectively. ’
‘I’m so sorry.’ There wasn’t anything else he could say. All his reasons – the explanations – seemed irrelevant against her hurt.
‘I don’t think I can talk to you right now. I need to go home.’ She sighed, looking smaller and sadder and more tired than he’d ever seen her before, and in that instant he truly hated himself.
‘OK. Goodnight, Mia.’
‘Night.’ She closed the door quietly, and he found himself wishing she’d slammed it instead. He could handle anger more easily than the sad, quiet resignation.