Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
Pippa woke to the warmth of an arm wrapped around her back and a hand curling around her waist. The small cottage bedroom looked hazy in the early light seeping through the curtains, and she could still hear the rain battering against the windowpanes.
She blinked, casting her mind back to the discovery last night.
She had no idea what time Theo had finally drifted off, only that at some point she’d felt him haul her in closer, his arm looping around her waist. It was still there now, holding her against him as if this were the most natural thing in the world. And God help her, she liked it.
She’d never slept well with Rob. He snored like a tractor, stole the duvet every night, and somehow managed to occupy eighty per cent of a double bed despite being one human being. In the years they’d been together, Pippa wasn’t sure she’d had a single decent night’s sleep.
But this … this felt different.
Theo was warm and still, the quiet kind of sleeper.
He didn’t try to dominate the bed, didn’t twitch or mutter or throw out a rogue elbow.
He simply held her as though he’d been doing it for years.
She shifted a little, and Theo’s arm instinctively tightened, pulling her closer.
Pippa turned slightly so she could see him.
His hair was an unholy mess, pointing in four different directions, but annoyingly it made him look even more handsome.
She’d always thought he was striking, even at university, but lying here now, tangled in sheets and morning light, he was almost unfairly gorgeous.
Without thinking, she murmured, ‘I could get used to this.’
She could see it clearly now: Sebastian had known she only had eyes for Theo back then.
Of course he had. Sebastian had always been perceptive, and his jealousy had been brewing even then, she realised.
Her guess was that Sebastian had known exactly who Theo was from the beginning, and he’d purposely kept his cards very close to his chest.
Pippa thought of the interview with Horace, the way Sebastian had lashed out, spinning wild accusations, creating ripples in the press with that theatrical burst of outrage.
It all made sense now. He’d been performing for the cameras, trying to sway public opinion, trying to rewrite a legacy he couldn’t escape.
But Pippa was now certain of one thing: if Sebastian knew anything about the secret commission, anything real, he would be shouting it from the rooftops. He would have weaponised it already. His silence was proof that he knew nothing. Just like everybody else.
Theo shifted a little. She wondered – dangerously, foolishly – what it would have been like waking up to him like this every morning.
No symphonic snoring. No awkward turning away.
No emotional distance masquerading as compatibility.
Just warmth. This soft closeness. Theo’s arm around her like it belonged there.
Then it hit her anew – that horrible realisation from last night.
Sebastian discarding Clara now that she was no use to him.
Clara calling Theo, desperate and shaken, apologising for cheating on him with the man who had tossed her aside the moment she was no longer useful to him.
Pippa’s heart thumped. Was Theo actually thinking of taking Clara back? Her stomach clenched at the thought. She studied him again, memorising the curve of his jaw, the strong line of his nose, the way his lips parted slightly in sleep.
Theo inhaled slowly, eyelids fluttering open. He blinked once, then twice, the corners of his mouth lifting faintly as his gaze focused on her.
‘Are you still here, Bell?’ he murmured, voice low and gravelly with sleep.
Before she could respond, he pulled her in tighter, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of her head. He exhaled softly against her hair. ‘I’m sorry we had a fight in the restaurant.’
‘You have nothing to be sorry about. It was me. I made bad choices. It’s all on me.’
He didn’t say any more; he simply held her. He didn’t move for a long moment, and though his arm stayed around her, Pippa felt something shift in him.
He exhaled, pressing his lips together briefly before speaking. ‘Clara phoned last night. She wants me back. Sebastian has already tossed her aside.’
‘On the basis of us being honest with each other, I already knew.’
Theo moved back slightly to look at her.
‘I overheard your conversation in the early hours of the morning.’
Theo nodded, eyes flicking away for a second before returning to her. ‘She said she made a mistake. She realised what she’s lost, and doesn’t want to throw us away.’ His fingers absentmindedly traced a slow, distracted pattern on her hip. ‘She wants to try again. To repair things.’
‘Do you … want that?’ she asked, trying to sound neutral, grown-up, completely unaffected. But her voice wobbled anyway.
Theo didn’t answer immediately. ‘I don’t know. That’s the problem. It’s … confusing.’
Pippa nodded. ‘Rob wanted to give it another go,’ she said quietly, surprising herself by admitting it out loud.
‘He kept saying we could fix everything if we just tried hard enough. But it was done. It had been done for a long time. I wasn’t truly happy.
He didn’t make my heart skip a beat. Are you happy with Clara, Theo? I mean truly happy, before Sebastian…’
‘What is happiness?’
‘If you’re asking yourself that question then you deserve better than what you’re currently getting.’
‘So did you,’ he whispered before he could stop himself.
They stared at each other for a long moment before Theo spoke. ‘I’m going to admit something… It was never right with Clara. Not really.’
‘Then why marry her?’ She stopped herself, shaking her head. ‘Sorry. That’s not my business.’
But Theo reached for her hand, threading his fingers gently through hers.
‘It is your business,’ he said quietly, ‘because I’m starting to realise something I should’ve realised a long time ago.’
Her heart clenched.
‘What’s that?’ she asked.
Theo tilted her chin upwards, looking directly into her eyes. There was no hesitation, no flicker of doubt. ‘Because she wasn’t you.’