Chapter 43
Smugglers End, The Harbourside, St Aidan, Cornwall
Loose ends and other women’s dresses
Thursday
When a wedding is rushing towards you at a million miles an hour, there’s no time to mess around.
After school on Thursday the kids decide that because they love them so much they’ll wear the outfits from the summer extravaganza.
When I get a call from Lando later on to say Fi’s dresses have arrived at his place, I leave Mum folding laundry, whistle for Angel, and head straight down to the harbourside.
Lando opens his door on the second knock, leads me straight up the stairs, and pauses on the landing to tickle Angel’s ears.
‘I hear you saved the day earlier.’
‘I can’t take the credit, but it’s what we’re there for.
’ I stare out of the tiny dormer window, past the cluster of masts in the harbour.
I see the sea beyond is jade green and flecked with white horses, and come up with a way to take the spotlight off me.
‘I hear Fi is growing her own wedding bouquet. Who’d have thought? ’
Lando chuckles. ‘None of us laze around. We’re all very driven. Esme is an art historian who restores paintings and breeds alpacas, and Piers trains racehorses. Even Rupert and Elliot work like trojans keeping the castle going.’
His list blows apart every preconception I’ve ever had about the Nancarrows. It took Athena coming into the shop to show me there was another, more human side to them.
I take a deep breath. ‘It seems I read you wrong too. I’m sorry for that.’
He shrugs. ‘No worries, I’m pleased you know now.
You have no idea how hard I’ve worked to distance myself from the extravagance of my upbringing and embrace the kind of values I don’t have to apologise for.
It’s been a lifetime’s work; some people have seen it as rebellion, others as rejection, and not everyone has understood.
But at least I have my integrity.’ He looks at me closely. ‘Does that change anything for you?’
I give my honest reaction. ‘It makes me feel guilty for not understanding sooner.’ I’ve been too preoccupied with my own problems to see the bigger picture.
His smile is mostly relief. ‘The important part is that you understand now. As for our other issues, let’s deal with them after the party.’
‘Good idea.’
It pulls me up short that he’s being so forthright. It’s easy to overlook our differences when we’ve been getting on so well day to day, but those old recriminations are still there waiting to floor us. And I need to remember that.
He raises his eyebrows. ‘With that out of the way, I believe I have some dresses for you to try? They’re in the bedroom.’
There’s no reason why my heart should be banging hard enough to jump out of my chest as Angel and I follow him through into the airy open room. I take in the accent lighting warming the cream walls and the sloping ceiling following the lines of the roof.
He stops at the high king-sized bed, and I’m so busy thinking how hotel-comfy it looks, marvelling at the dangling spiral of lights in the corner, and trying to peek what’s on his bedside table that I don’t stop in time, and crash into the back of him.
I laugh and jump away. ‘There I go again. This is why I’ll be a liability on Saturday.’
He points to a row of dresses arranged across the bed. ‘I’m sure you’ll look so fabulous no one will care what you demolish. I certainly won’t.’
I’m struck by a sudden doubt. ‘So you want me there to cause mayhem and fly the flag for how real and gritty you’ve become?’
‘No, Maevey.’ He supresses a smile and shakes his head. ‘I want you there because I like spending time with you. When you’re with me life feels worth living, and when you’re not, it doesn’t. It’s always been like that.’
I frown at him and try to take in what he’s getting at. ‘Can you say that again in Cornish?’
He rolls his eyes. ‘Aren’t we supposed to be finding you something to wear, ideally before the morning?’
I rub my hands together. ‘You’re right.’ Then I spot a pile of boxes beside the bed and do a double take. ‘What are those?’
Lando grins. ‘Fi doesn’t do things by halves; there are bags and shoes to go with each outfit. She checked, and apparently you wear the same size.’
I frown. ‘But they’re Jimmy Choos and Manolo Blahniks!’
He pulls a face. ‘That’s Fi for you. The castle is full of the things; you’ll be doing her a favour giving them an outing. It’s her way of showing how much she appreciates you finding her another wedding dress at short notice.’
I turn back to the bed. ‘Did she say anything about these dresses?’
Lando rubs his thumb along his jaw and narrows his eyes. ‘Some are for the day, and some for the night?’ A smile spreads across his face. ‘We’ll wear our usual “uniform” for the beach hut, obviously, then change here before I drive us to the castle.’
I catch sight of the time on Lando’s bedside clock and realise I can’t put this off any longer. ‘Okay, any hints where to start?’
Lando grins again. ‘I was hoping you’d ask.’ He pulls out a silky blue midi dress, and a short orange and red striped shimmery one with a full skirt. ‘The blue would go with your eyes, and the stripy one would bring out your fun side – but what do I know?’
I kick off my Converse. ‘I’ll need you to stay to help do them up.’ I’m thinking about the practicalities with so many dresses. ‘If you turn your back and close your eyes, I’ll tell you when I’m ready.’
I strip off my shirt, whip off my jeans and slide the slinky blue fabric over my head. When it slips down my body effortlessly, I already know this will be the one. ‘Okay, Lando, time for the zip.’
Shivers slither down my back as he does it up, but he’s already looking through the shoes.
‘Will these work?’
I push my toes into black patent stilettos with tiny bows on the back, then marvel at being five inches taller with perfectly comfortable feet. ‘How’s that?’ I turn around, and when I find the full-length mirror, it’s like I’m looking at another version of myself.
Lando laughs. ‘Stunning. Not that I don’t appreciate you in jeans. Do you want to try the others?’
I look down at the folds of midnight blue fabric skimming my hips, the side slit that’s barely there, and a neckline that’s incredibly sexy without showing too much. ‘Nope, I can’t imagine anything better than this. If you undo me, I’ll move on to the party dresses.’
As the fabric pools around my ankles I meet Lando’s eyes in the mirror and my stomach does a triple flip. Then he looks away and I pick up the next dress.
He gives a cough. ‘My eyes are currently closed.’
‘Open them now, and get zipping.’
This time I lean into the shivers, swish the fabulous full skirt, then step forward into the heels he’s holding out. ‘Red suede?’
Lando pulls a face. ‘You could choose some others for dancing and bring your trainers for when we go adventuring.’ He gives a rueful laugh. ‘I’m not sure I’ll last a whole day on the lawns.’
‘I’ll remember my Converse.’
He’s watching my face. ‘Bring your toothbrush too, because once your mum picks up the kids, you might want to stay over.’
I gave a sigh. ‘It’s all arranged then?’
‘It is.’ Lando winces. ‘You’re having my room; it’s in one of the turrets.’
‘What about you?’
‘I usually sleep in the tree house anyway. It’s less wild than it sounds.’ He looks at me sideways. ‘In the interests of full disclosure, the gateposts have lions on.’
I hold up my hand. ‘It’s one day. I’ll cope. If you’d said there was a tree house earlier, I may have been there sooner.’
He looks down at me. ‘That dress looks great.’ He frowns, then stoops down beside me. ‘There’s something hanging off the bottom.’
I’m always wary of dangling threads. ‘Careful, don’t unravel the whole hemline.’
His face is level with my knees, and as his hand grazes the inside of my leg, I snatch my breath.
He looks up, our eyes lock, and as tiny shivers spread from my thigh and over the whole of my body it’s as if the world has stopped turning and time is standing still.
I can hear the thud of a heartbeat too, but it could be his, not mine.
And then he moves his hand away, and the spell is broken.
‘It’s okay, only a piece of cotton.’
I wobble slightly on my heels, and as he stands up I’m fighting to bring myself back in the room.
‘Unzip me then, and it’s job done.’
This time I don’t wait for him to turn away to strip off, and in three seconds flat I’m back in my shirt, buttoning up my jeans.
Lando nods at the bed. ‘I’ll tidy this lot up if you want to head off.’ He’s watching as I bend and pull on my Converse, and I notice his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows. ‘Or we could have a drink before you go?’
If I did, I might not leave.
I have no idea where the hell that came from.
He might live on fresh air, but there are still a hundred other reasons not to throw myself at him.
Especially if my judgement is clouded by my new awareness that still hasn’t gone away.
I smile at what a disaster that would be, give a half whistle to Angel who jumps up from the rug, head for the door and run all the way down the stairs.
I hurry through the shadows of the hallway and I’m reaching for the front door handle when I stop.
I’m thinking how far I’ve come since that day dancing on the harbour, and how, for better or worse, Lando has been at the centre of everything this summer, helping with the beach hut, hanging out with the kids, and even bringing us Fi.
And then there were those seals. I really wouldn’t be where I am if it hadn’t been for him.
He’s two steps behind me. As I turn to smile at him I catch the crinkles at the corners of his eyes, think about the hints of his troubled past, and I’m engulfed by a rush of affection.
I spin and put my palm on his chest. ‘Thank you for everything, Lando.’
Then I go on tiptoe, and because I’m suddenly weirdly overwhelmed by gratitude, I drop a kiss on his cheek.
‘Any time, Maevey.’
His breath is warm in my ear, and as his jaw brushes against my chin my whole body feels like it’s filled with hot syrup, especially the bit between my legs.
My brain is telling me to run, anywhere, as fast as I can, but my whole being is howling for me to stay.
My mouth skids down his cheek. And then I find the corner of his lips, the heat of his mouth, and as he starts to kiss me back, he tastes of chocolate and vanilla and summer days and walks on the beach.
I’m giving into the ache, arching my body against him when there’s a loud rap behind me.
Angel leaps through the air barking, the front door opens and hits me in the back, and as Martha belts down the hall to the living area, we’re left gawping at Sav.
He blinks for a moment, then recovers himself.
‘Sorry to barge in, it’s an emergency evacuation!
Martha just crashed Erica’s parents’ outdoor dinner party, and they’re going postal.
’ He wipes a clump of what looks like raspberry roulade off Lando’s wall with his thumb.
‘She’s still shedding remnants of the sweet trolley. ’
Lando groans. ‘She’s way past her last warning.’
I make my smile wide as I squeeze past Sav. ‘I’ll leave you two to sort your wayward puppy. Good to see you, Sav. I’ll catch you tomorrow, Lando.’
And yet again I’m out on the harbourside, asking myself what the hell just happened, and how I’m ever going to live it down.