18. Chanice
Chanice
As soon as I finish coming, he is carrying me again, depositing me on the bed like I weigh nothing.
The whole time, he stays inside of me. If I thought his girth was a lot to take in my mouth, it’s stretching me in ways I have never felt before.
What should have been uncomfortable instead feels right, as he fills an ache I have had for too long.
He pulls my legs apart and just holds still inside of me. Breathing heavily, he looks into my eyes.
“You were supposed to wait to give me head.” He pushes his slick hair out of his face.
“I couldn’t.” I wiggle my bottom, enticing a hiss out of him.
“You know what that means?”
I shake my head.
“I have to give you five more.”
“We have time.” I smile, loving the feel of him being balls deep while talking to me.
“No, I don’t think you understand.” He leans forward and presses his lips against my neck. The slow lick up brings him to my ear. “They all have to happen tonight.”
My face displays equal parts horror and want, causing him to laugh before he starts to move inside of me.
“No, I can’t.”
He pulls out to the tip and then plunges in, full force, slamming deep.
“You can do it.”
“Alex.” My pleas are cut short by my moan as he lifts my legs up until my ankles are on his shoulder, angling himself to hit even deeper. Still in those slow strokes, pulling all the way out to press all the way in.
“Yes, darling?”
“But what if I can’t take it?” It’s an effort to get the question out.
He answers by moving his thumb to gently rub my clit, telling me I don’t have a choice.
I want to protest further, but even the idea of this non-stop pleasure makes his plan seem like a good one.
I nod in agreement, like I have any choice, causing him to smile.
He kisses my ankle before beginning to pick up speed.
“Good girl.”
If what happened against the wall was raw and unfiltered, the steady, deep strokes now are calculated. He is slowly drawing me back to that point that he plans to take me to five more times.
The pressure building between my legs makes me want to close my eyes in ecstasy, but I want to see him.
He looks down on me, that same hunger that burns in his eyes every time singing in them now.
Licking his lips like a starved man who just had a feast placed in front of him, it’s clear he plans to devour me until there is nothing left.
As I begin to move my hips in sync with his, he throws his head back in a sound that shows how close he is to losing control again. Still, he moves in a way that is equal parts teasing and satisfying. Even the small swirls he does to my bud of nerves are light and slow.
Between his thumb, his dick, and the corset pinching on my nipples, I’m on the brink of another orgasm.
The way he is saying my name, like it’s a prayer on his lips, I know that he isn’t far behind.
So when I squeeze around him, my back arching as I come for the fourth time tonight, I’m not surprised when he falls forward, his own hips jerking.
He doesn’t pull out immediately, but when he does, I think this has to be the end. He isn’t actually going to continue. Only when he comes back from getting rid of the condom, there is a devilish look in his eyes.
“Open your legs.”
“You can’t be serious.” I sit up on my elbows and look at him, searching for some sort of sanity in this insane plan.
“That was one.”
“You ate me out until I came twice in the car, and now just fucked me through two more, that is actually four.”
“That means only six in total.”
I start to laugh, excitement and hysteria mixing with each other. When he pulls me to the edge of the bed and starts to pull down my panties, the laughter dies.
The seventh orgasm he promised me happens with just his fingers, fucking me with three, and a thumb on my clit.
He works me until I am sliding up the bed to get away from him.
He doesn’t let me go, and before the waves of the last one can subside, he is licking up another storm, using his tongue to penetrate me with his nose deep in my juices.
That apparently is enough time for him to recover because nine and ten come through the prowess of his dick and various positions that my weight should have made difficult.
When I scream out for the last time, my throat is raw and my voice gone, broken by this man’s determination to please me.
I fall into a useless heap, happy that at some point the lingerie came off.
I am twitching, and everything feels sensitive.
He pulls me into his arms, not bothering to put us under the blanket that we have soiled.
I didn’t plan on staying the night, but there is no way I can go home. I don’t even know if I can walk.
“You okay?” He rubs a hand up and down my back in soothing motions. I only have the energy to nod. “You want to go to bed?” He starts to get up, but I hold onto his arm to keep him there.
With the last of my energy, I turn to face him. There is a safety between the sheets of lovers that lets truths run free. I want to talk to him.
“Do you do everything with this level of intensity?” I try to imagine what dating him would be like, if this is just us fucking.
Patient, attentive, and thorough are only a few words to describe how he has handled me since this all began.
If I give him the chance, he will likely add new words to my vocabulary, and new feelings that I have never felt before.
“I told you I am passionate in almost everything I do.”
“Including loving?” I don’t know why I am broaching this subject, but curiosity has me asking.
“Yes, including that.”
“So, you have been in love before?” I slide a little further out of his arms so that I can really look at him.
He is still a little sweaty from his effort, and his lips are pouty and swollen from kissing.
He looks like the sex god that he proved to me he is.
I push his hair out of his face and kiss him again.
He sits up on one elbow and brings his other hand to stroke my arm from shoulder to wrist. The feel of his touch is intoxicating, and it’s bringing me back to that place of satisfaction, but a different kind.
“Once.” His eyebrows furrow, and an indent appears between them.
“What happened?”
“Well, we had different visions for the future. We met when I was living in France. The person I was there is not who I was always going to be. I knew at some point I needed to come back and work for my family, and she loved the person that she met.”
But he is not that person, he is this one. And I don’t know what he was like before, but I would like to know about this version. I’m about to ask him to tell me more, but he beats me to speaking.
“Have you had any relationships of significance?” Pulling on one of my frayed coils, he watches as it bounces back into place.
“No, well, um, it’s complicated. I thought I loved someone once, but it was just desperation.
I wanted someone to love me, and I accepted whatever he could give.
When my life changed drastically, I realized that I didn’t actually even like him as a person.
I just liked having someone pay attention to me. ”
I was an affection-starved little girl, lost and alone at the age of eighteen. I didn’t know any better. When the kids came back into my life, they reminded me what it actually feels like to be cared about.
They are my true first loves, and they are the only reason I may one day be able to accept something real.
He runs a hand down my face, cupping my cheek. I expect pity to be in his eyes, but all that is looking back is a want. It’s different from the normal hungry stare he gives me, but this one seems to contain a desire that I’m too scared to name.
“So this person you are now, do you want to be them?” I pull back and lay my head on the pillow. He does the same, and we are just looking at each other for a moment. Then he laughs, and it is dark and humorless. It makes me reach for his hand.
“I don’t know if that matters.”
My head jerks back from the shock of that answer.
“Of course it does.”
He sighs and squeezes my hand before letting it go. Rubbing his face, the look of tension doesn’t leave.
“The strings I told you about, the ones you are scared of. They pull me in directions, whether I want to go there or not. They shape who I get to be. I don’t really have a choice, so I don’t see the point in dwelling on whether or not I want to be this person. I just have to be.”
We don’t have much in common, but I get this.
I have so little in my life that I get to choose, I don’t see a point in figuring out if the choices make me happy.
But at least I know the reason I’m doing all of this.
I don’t think he can say the same. I want to tell him about the kids, how my own obligation to family is shaping who I am as well.
But before I open my mouth, my phone begins to ring.
The groan I let out when I sit up is only a fraction of how exhausted I feel after fucking until 3 a.m., but I force myself to go over to my bag. It’s Imani.
“Thank god,” she sobs when I answer.
My back pulls to attention at the sound of the panic in her voice.
“What happened?”
Alexander sits up at that, but I hold up a finger and walk out of the room.
“I’m so sorry, I know I should’ve been watching him. Me and my friend Jeremy were just in the room, I swear. I didn’t know he was cooking.” She is stuttering over her words, stopping to cry every few ones.
“Imani, calm down. What’s going on?”
“We are at the hospital. Jamal burned himself making ramen, and it’s bad, oh god, Chanice, it’s so bad.”
No.
I run back into the room on wobbly legs and snatch up my pants. My hands are trembling as I try to stay calm enough to get to them on.
“What hospital?”
She tells me, and I assure her I’m on my way. She is still crying when I hang up, and I’m fighting my own tears. My worst fear coming true had to happen when I’m not with them. I can chastise myself later, but now I need to get there.
“What’s going on?” Alex is beside me, his hand on my arm.
“I don’t have time to explain.” I can’t find my shoes, and I’m five seconds away from leaving without them when he passes them to me. Rushing to get them on, I start to dial the number for a cab.
“Fuck.” I stop short, my hands coming up to my head. I left my credit card with Imani, and I don’t have enough in my bank to get across town. Alex steps in front of me, fully dressed, like an answer to my dilemma. It’s blurring a million lines, but I don’t have a choice.
“I need you to take me to the hospital.”
He nods once and leads me out.