9. 8
The House of Love was a grand white marble structure near the centre of Dytho on Arakova Square.
It had a rectangular base with a protruding triangular roof supported by Arakovian columns.
The square itself was spotless, with the House ushers charged with cleaning the stones outside of any debris or foul messes each day.
The fountain puttered from behind me, the statue of a hunted fawn commissioned by the House long before I was pledged to it.
The smell of bread from the adjacent bakery brought back more nostalgia, and I nearly cried there and then, standing on the first step. They had supplied our breakfasts for my entire stay there, and on our day of rest on Sundays, I would purchase one of their divine strawberry tarts.
They had to let me back. They just had to. Ekris would hear me, as he had before.
I took a couple of deep breaths, and focused on the sound of my boots hitting the perfect marble. I raised my hand to knock on the huge fifteen-foot-high carved oak doors, when it opened.
One of the House ushers, Ben, stared at me in surprise. “Annabelle.” Then he stepped out of the door with a look behind him. “What are you doing here?”
He had always been kind to me, and a sprig of hope branched inside me.
I nodded to the door. “Can I come in?”
His jaw clenched and his kind brown eyes showed his remorse. “You chose to leave us.”
“Please, Ben.”
He shook his head, making his brown curls bob, and grimaced. “I can’t let you in.”
“Can I speak to Talia, then?” I asked, not letting the rejection fall yet. I clutched at his hand. “I need to pray to Ekris.”
He stared down at my hand. “It was Talia who told us not to let you in.”
Oh.
Talia. The Leader of the House of Love, the one who had let me in even though I was too young to serve. The one who had paid for tutors for me, at Ekris’ bidding. She had given me my life back, and now she had told the ushers to keep me out?
I couldn’t believe it.
I released my grip on Ben, and we both stared at each other awkwardly. It wasn’t his fault. If Talia had declared me unwelcome, he had no choice but to bar my entry.
Then again. she had no right to deny me from praying to my God. To my Ekris. He might have permitted me to leave him, but he could just as easily change his mind.
I thought through every possible idea in those two horrible seconds in front of the door, and then touched my hand to my side, and the leather pouch there.
I had just enough left. This was the only way to get in.
“I’ll pay,” I said.
Ben frowned. “What?”
“I’ll come in as a visitor,” I explained, tapping my pouch.
He glanced down at my pouch and shook his head. “Annie. It’s one gold.”
I stared at him. “I know. I’ll pay.”
Ben looked ready to deny me, until I pulled out the last remaining gold in my possession. It glinted in the sun.
He raised an eyebrow, and then looked back at the door. “I’m not sure—”
“You cannot break our code,” I interrupted. “You have to let every paying visitor be judged by Ekris.”
Ben looked at me, and I saw the sympathy cross his eyes as my fingers shook on the gold. Then he glanced around the square, before opening the door behind him. “Come in.”
I mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him as I slipped inside, and the cold mustiness of the air within fell over me like a sweet breeze. It smelt of smoking incense and hyacinths. It smelt of home.
My eyes adjusted to the lower light. Though some of the day’s rays peeled through the high windows at the far end of the entrance hall, they only illuminated squares on the near wall. The rest was lit by chandeliers of fine beeswax candles and sconces along the walls.
I watched as Ben stepped up to the pure silver gong in the centre, and hit it soundly.
We both waited as the rich noise filled the space and reverberated out.
The Ekrissians would know a visitor had come.
They would be heading to the altar now. I brushed my sweaty palms on my cloak as I took it off and handed it to Ben.
He hung it up on a rack alongside one other, and then we were moving.
The gong fell quiet as Ben led me through our temple as he would a visitor.
He was silent, too, his head bent down. The high marble ceilings offered no greeting, and it was only the swish of his red robe against the muted parquet floor and the low crackling as we passed hanging incense burners that provided any ambience.
The House was intentionally sparse in its decoration, to reserve the awe and spectacle for the places where it mattered.
The slow procession around the hallways to Ekris’ altar took two full minutes. I knew it, because we had been trained to ready ourselves and get to the chamber in that frame of time. Ben arrived at the painted red doors of the altar room and, with no knock or announcement, two ushers opened them.
The altar room was a wonder.
It never failed to take my breath away, even now.
Especially now, when I had felt so isolated from Ekris since I had left.
Waterlilies and white rose petals bathed in the two narrow rectangular pools either side of the walkway to the altar.
On the far side of those, six women and two men stood facing the walls: all veiled with red gauzy fabric that would shield their features even if they were turned towards me.
Four on either side, all clad in red robes that cowled down at the back to their hips before flowing to the floor, showing their individual Ekrissian marks.
They were each of them golden, the touch of their God shining out from every swirl.
The evidence of their ongoing piety and faithfulness was only another dagger in my side.
In the centre, Ekris' altar rose up. It was a statue of him, taller than any man could be, carved in matching marble.
The rock figure was draped in red silk that slipped over his chest and over one leg.
His eyes were pitched down, ready to stare down at the person standing just before him.
Around his ankles, another pool of waterlilies, this time with red rose petals.
But between myself and my God, was Talia. She was the only Ekrissian facing us. As Leader of the House, she wore no veil over her face. Instead, she wore a look of accusation as she shot a withering look at Ben.
Ben cantered down the central walkway, his quick steps hitting the marble like a rabbit.
He ducked his head to whisper into her ear.
For a woman so short, Talia was often terrifying.
She was marked, but she didn’t show her back like the rest of the Ekrissians.
I remember when she first showed me her own mark, trying to help my nerves when I was still a child.
The gold had been so distinct against her dark skin, almost as if lit from within.
After a moment, Talia narrowed her eyes and nodded, waving Ben away.
She looked at me with an unfathomable expression, and then cocked an eyebrow. I took a step into the room, and held up my gold piece.
We stared at each other.
There was a scuffling of movement from one of the Ekrissians, and I knew our delay was not normal procedure. The devotees would know something was amiss.
Talia painted a smile on her face I had seen many times before, though never directed at me. Then she spoke the words. “A visitor comes before you. She will be judged by Ekris, and if her intentions are deemed safe, she may make her choice.”
The words were the same ones I had heard countless times, but her tone was a warning. Her emphasis on judgement and safety made me want to turn back, as if she knew I would be received harshly.
Another scuffle from one of the Ekrissians; they would be dying to turn around. Female visitors of Ekris were not unheard of, but they were deeply uncommon. Most women in Dytho did not have to pay a gold to have the pleasure of another’s company, after all.
But they would not turn. They knew it wasn’t allowed.
Talia approached me, glaring down at me before turning to the right and standing by the door.
I had asked her permission to leave the order the day before I had asked Ekris himself.
She had refused me and called me a naive and idiotic girl.
Then I had gone over her head, to the only person who could truly grant the change.
It was nothing now, it was done, and for a short moment, I could reach the altar. I walked down the walkway swiftly, falling to my knees on the red cushion and staring at Ekris’ watery feet.
I hadn’t heard him since the night I’d left. The night I’d ruined my life.
I dropped the gold coin into the water.
Now, my prayer came out like a whisper. “Ekris.”
Nothing came back, and all I could hear was the faint gurgling of the water.
I closed my eyes, and prayed louder. “Ekris, are you there?”
Air prickled the back of my neck, and still I heard nothing. I forced myself to keep my eyes closed as I called out again.
After another scuffle from my right, I squeezed my eyes tighter. “Ekris?”
Finally, the deep voice filled my head. It was like water on a hot day; it was like darkness and sweetness and an embrace that felt like fire itself.
“My Annie. Why have you returned here?”
I sucked in a sharp breath to stop the sob from catching. “I want to come back. I need to.”
Ekris tutted into my mind, and even that made me want to cry out in relief. “We made a deal.”
I bit my lip to keep myself together.
Robar had come back here in the weeks since I had left the House.
I doubted his claims were bravado or lies, as much as I hoped it would be.
Ekris had given that same steam of approval and allowed him to sleep with one of the other women.
Ekris was only supposed to turn down those with ill intent, or diseases that could harm his Ekrissians, and yet it still hurt that he had accepted Robar back.
He had allowed my betrothed to form an attachment to another.
Nevertheless, the result was the same. “He doesn’t want me.”