40. 39 #2
“Wisdom is still in you,” Ragnifort said, his head tilting to one side. “Knessus bonded to you, imparted part of her into your blood. She might not speak to you as she once did. But your blood will work.”
“And he has to die?” I asked, my voice breaking.
“Yes.”
The hope died in me. I should have asked him before, to allow myself to grow accustomed to the idea. But I couldn’t say the words. It would work. Davian would die, and the sacrifice would be complete.
Ragnifort raised an eyebrow and looked between us. “Have you invited me here to watch?”
“No,” I said, and it was nearly a shout. “No. I only wanted you to confirm his death would not be wasted.”
I avoided looking at Davian, even though I could feel his eyes on me. I didn’t want to find his sympathy and I couldn’t stand his love right now. Not when I knew where it would still lead us.
“Ah, Fopdoodle. You are the best of your kind,” he joked. Then the humorous tone faded and he put his hand on his heart. “You hate this thing you’re being asked to do, but you’ll do it anyway. For him. For them. Even if you lose them all.”
I couldn’t tell if he was sincere.
My hands clenched into fists at my sides. “Camriel said he was going to go through, too.”
“You can come with me, Fopdoodle,” Ragnifort said, a quick fox-like smile shifting his appearance. “I’d prefer your company, actually.”
“Annie,” Davian said. “No.”
I avoided him again. “What would happen?”
“We’d guide the souls of the nine through the veil to the gates of the Garden. There, the Gods will see the payment has been made, open the door, and I’ll be restored.”
“And what of the souls?”
He spoke in a rehearsed manner that I didn’t trust for a second. “I’ll bargain with the Gods to grant them their bodies back, undamaged and whole.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Why would they say yes?”
“Most of the Gods want me back,” he said, spreading his hands. “And they want me back without me wreaking havoc at their callous treatment of me. They will vote in my favour, or I’ll burn your world until they do.”
I was glad for my lack of sleep and all the tears that had wracked across me, because the horror of his statement didn’t land as it once did.
It prickled at the back of my neck, the omen of what was to come.
But mostly, I hated how this cycle of torment would continue.
“Why do I feel this is going to be far harder than you’re suggesting? ”
“Because you’re not as stupid as you look.”
The joke didn’t land.
It was hard to imagine the world outside the walls of this dim basement. Upstairs, outside, today was like any other. The noon sun rising to crest in the sky, the call of gulls drowned out by the sounds of carts rolling against the stone and hollered commands. Here, life seemed to bleed away.
I looked at the man I had come to love. He stared at the floor.
That was it. We had the truth now. It would work. The blood from his sacrifice would open the portal. There were no more barriers, nothing that I could think of to dissuade Davian from the role of lamb to the slaughter.
Still, I swallowed. “Davian?”
His silver eyes were fraught with every terrible emotion. He shook his head at me. “I can’t live like this. In this place, with everyone gone.”
He wanted to die. I wondered whether he would still choose this, even if he couldn’t bring them back.
I didn’t want to know the answer. The part of me that had first pushed me to Ekris, now told me I wasn’t good enough.
That yet again, I had chosen a man who wanted something else far more than he wanted me.
But that part of me was smaller than the whole. The whole of him was screaming. I couldn’t deny his despair.
And yet, if we went through with it… What was left for me?
I still had Yona. She would welcome me back. But The Curved Eclipse didn’t feel like home anymore, as much as she would try.
How noble of him, to sacrifice himself to prevent another’s death. How noble of me, I grimaced, to allow it. It didn’t matter what I chose, pain was inevitable.
True enough, a familiar voice said.
I inhaled sharply.
Samiscus. How was he in my head? I wasn’t marked. I wasn’t his devotee. This shouldn’t be possible.
Once more, I felt Ragnifort’s curious eyes. I pretended it hadn’t happened, pretended I hadn’t heard a thing.
One last try. “What if we left Dytho?”
Davian’s hand flexed. “And let someone else die in my place?”
I nodded, once.
There was no running from this. That much was clear. It was only a matter of how, and when. I calculated, quickly. Maybe we could come to some kind of arrangement with Ragnifort.
The god tutted. “Annie, there is one little detail I must remind you of.”
“What detail?”
Ragnifort stepped towards me, crossing the circle itself in precise steps, not touching a single one of the painted lines. “We had a deal, remember?”
Davian frowned, glancing at me warily. “What deal?”
I gave him a look that tried to convey I had no idea what he was talking about.
“I gave you the information you wanted. Information that led you to Camriel. Far sooner than I would have liked, I dare say,” Ragnifort said. “What did you offer in return?”
“I didn’t mean it.”
“And yet, you made a deal with a god.” He licked his lips. “In return for anything.”
Davian sucked in a breath. “Annie.”
“What difference does any of it make?” I asked, a flash of that fury splashing into my tone.
“I said that because I wanted to keep my friends alive. Davian. Fella. Well, now what? She’s dead.
And now he’s going to forfeit his life anyway.
You didn’t help. You didn’t fix anything at all.
All you did was get Camriel killed, too. ”
I heaved in a breath, and Ragnifort blinked.
I heard a sigh in my mind and recognised it as Ekris’. I heard something else, too, and tried to dismiss that. But it was a thought that I couldn’t escape. Maybe it would have been better if Camriel had completed his work. How was the result any different?
The god raised an eyebrow. “The Fopdoodle has fire.” The pause felt like a waiting judgement. “Nevertheless, I’m here to collect.” I breathed hard. “I want you to finish Davian’s mark and complete the ritual.”
My chest tightened, and my hands splayed.
Whatever he had said, meant something. It had bound me, in some way.
Knowing what his favour might be, didn’t lessen the weight of reality.
I tried to shake my head, but panic set in as I realised I couldn’t move at all.
I blinked, and at least, that was allowed. “Davian.”
“It’s fine,” he said. He held his hands up, all of his attention on me. “It’s fine, my love. I want you to end it.”
Ragnifort stood in the centre of the circle, and then he pointed his finger to the far table in the corner. “Pick up the knife, Annie.”
I swivelled, and I was certain it wasn’t me who chose to do it. On top of the table, there was a mortar and pestle, and a short paring knife. A few long-dead herbs lay beside them.
The binding feeling intensified, and still lacking control, I stepped towards that table. It was awful, my mind a passenger in a runaway carriage. I tried to speak, and nothing came out. Whatever compulsion he worked into my muscles made it harder to concentrate on the words.
I choked, my legs still moving slowly towards the table, but too fast for me to stop. I forced the words out, somehow able to get control of at least my mouth. “You said you couldn’t do it yourself.”
“That’s why you’re doing it.”
He hadn’t lied, but if this was how he handled the truth, if this was how his deals were done, I wouldn’t trust him for a second. I had no time to consider a choice in that matter. My panic only rose as my legs kept moving towards that table.
I growled, only managing to spit out a single word. “Ragnifort.”
He tapped his foot. “I’m waiting.”