Umbrelai to Urasal
Idid not need to go to Umbrelai to find Aviaryn.
She was sitting outside the ward entrance to our room with her knees drawn to her chest, a sweet tucked into one cheek as she watched the twins through the shimmering barrier.
I still did not know how often she came or how long she stayed when she did and admittedly felt a small wave of relief come over me that our bed was not visible from the tunnel entrance.
I looked down. “You are wearing shoes.”
She nodded. “It is something new I am trying.”
She did not look at me.
"Fiorakis won."
I frowned.
"Won what?"
"The spoon."
I followed her gaze.
Fiorakis had somehow claimed a wooden spoon twice her size and was dragging it determinedly across the floor while Ari watched from several feet away. The look on his face suggested he had not yet decided whether crawling was worth the effort.
A laugh escaped me before I could stop it.
"I think Ari believes if he waits long enough she will bring it to him."
"I think so too."
We watched them in silence.
"They have grown," Aviaryn said.
"They have."
"I come here sometimes."
"I know."
"They do not know I am here."
"No."
"I like watching them anyway."
I smiled.
"I am glad."
She unwrapped another sweet and placed it in her mouth.
I almost asked for one, but thought it improper to take candy from a child.
You will be home soon and whether it is Veynar, Shalvar, or Alarna, there will be sweets. And Kiss. And Ari. And Colsar.
The thought made something in my chest ease.
"They smile more now."
"They do."
"They look like you."
"They look like Colsar."
She considered that.
She looked at Fiorakis pause to put her fingers in her mouth.
“They look hungry."
I laughed. “They always look hungry."
She nodded as though I had confirmed something very important.
"I wanted to thank you," I said quietly.
She looked at me for the first time.
"For what?"
"For telling him."
"The white-haired man?"
"Yes."
She shrugged.
"He looked sad."
"He was."
“Sadness is a weakness. And weakness will not keep them safe.” She nodded toward the twins.
“And I like them.”
"I know."
She studied me. "You are less sad now."
"I am."
"Good."
The word was simple and certain.
I sat down beside her.
“What do you want?” She asked abruptly, her eyes never leaving the twins.
"I need you to go to Urasal."
She sucked thoughtfully on the sweet before looking back at the twins.
“I would not make a very good child-watcher. They are nice to look at, but I prefer creatures.” Her voice was calm, matter-of-fact.
I choked back a laugh. “I am not asking you to be their nanny.”
“Then what exactly are you asking of me?” She sighed. “People always want something. So tell me what you want.”
Before I could answer, she spoke again. "Is someone making me leave?"
"No."
"Then why?"
I hesitated. "Because there are things I have to do," I said finally. "And I would rather know you are somewhere safe while I do them."
She rolled the sweet from one side of her mouth to the other.
"I am difficult to kill."
"I know."
"And if I say no?"
"I will not force you."
She considered that.
"How long?"
"I do not know."
She sighed dramatically.
"I dislike not knowing."
"So do I."
She turned to look at me for the first time since I sat down.
"How did you step through the ward?" I asked. "When you came to Urasal. Colsar said he saw you do it.”
She considered the question as though deciding how much of the answer to give. "My mother banked some of my feeder blood from when I was a baby. Feeder blood is one of the few things that can make one strong enough to leave Morrath."
"So she saved it for you," I said. "And gave it to you one day."
"No." She said it simply. "My mother has been too busy lying and killing to secure our future." A pause. "While she was gone I found it and drank it.” A pause. “All of it.”
I looked at her. "You were not supposed to know it was there, I bet.”
"I was not supposed to know it was there," she agreed, without particular remorse.
"Why would she keep that from you?"
Aviaryn was quiet for a moment. "I do not know," she said. Then, after another pause, "Perhaps she felt I was not ready. Perhaps she had another plan for it." She shrugged. "Perhaps she simply did not think to tell me."
"And you drank it anyway."
She looked at me. "I have lived in Morrath my entire life," she said. "Inside tunnels and palaces and wards that exist to keep things in." She put another sweet in her mouth. "I did not need anyone to give me permission to know what the outside of it looked like."
I said nothing.
She turned back to the twins. I watched them with her.
"Do you think, perhaps, that I would be back in five days?"
I smiled. "I think it is possible."
Neither of us said anything after that.
Finally she stood, dusting off her dress.
"I suppose Urasal has sweets."
"It does."
"Better sweets?"
"I doubt it."
She wrinkled her nose.
"I will go anyway."
She started to walk away, then stopped.
"When everything is finished..."
"Yes?"
"...can I come back and see them?"
I smiled.
"As often as you like."
She looked through the ward again, almost longingly. “Should I go now?"
"Yes."
She frowned slightly.
"But I do not have clothing."
"You are a princess," I said. "You will be treated as such."
She seemed to accept that immediately.
"My mother."
"Yes?"
She shrugged.
"You must send word and tell her I am gone." She frowned. "She has not yet made it to Bloodhaven, so if she is displeased she likely won't be strong enough to kill you."
She paused. "I would prefer that she did not."
Something inside my chest tightened.
I reached over and smoothed a loose strand of hair behind her ear.
"I will tell her where you are.”
She looked at me. "You will remember? It is important that you do."
"I always remember."
She nodded once.
"Very well."
She stood, brushed the front of her dress smooth, then looked back toward the ward one last time.
"I think Fiorakis will be troublesome."
I laughed softly.
"I think you may be right."
"And Ari will pretend not to follow her."
"He will."
"He will follow her anyway."
"Probably."
She seemed satisfied with that conclusion.
Then she reached into the small bag at her side and pulled out a book and held it toward me.
I looked at it. Then at her.
The nursery rhyme book. The one with the hare and the crown.
"You found it," I said.
She held it out. "I wanted you to have it. Since you said you always wanted to read the real version."
I took it from her hands. I looked down at it for a moment. Then I handed it back to her and smiled.
"I would like to read it with you," I said. "When I see you next.” I paused. “Perhaps you can begin reading while I’m gone.”
She nodded. “I would like that.”
She looked at the book. Then at me. Something moved in her face that she did not try to hide and did not name.
She tucked it back into her bag.
"I will go now."
"Thank you."
She nodded once and slipped another sweet into her mouth before stepping through the ward.
I watched Colsar open the door to the chamber as though he had been waiting for her the entire time. His eyes met mine and he gave a small nod.
He would care for her like his own.
I watched her fold her arms across her chest and narrow her eyes as though assessing whether he was worthy of acknowledgement.
I sighed and turned to leave. As I left the tunnels I could not help but wonder whether or not I should have had her go tell her mother first.
No. No, Asharin, I reminded myself. She cannot be trusted. No one here can.