29. Konnor #2
“Hi, my name is Blesk Bellamy, and this song is called ‘Without You’.” She takes a deep breath. Her fingers begin to move on the strings. I can tell she’s nervous when her tongue darts out to wet her lower lip. I shuffle my feet apart.
She moves her mouth to the harmonica, her brows furrowing in concentration as she blows through the channels. Her nervous tension becomes my own, and I try to ignore the way it’s like I’m up there with her.
The harmonica’s music fills the spaces that aren’t filled with her voice. God only knows how she manages her breathing like that.
“Time’s worth nothing without you.” I repeat the last line of the chorus in my head—hopefully.
Not just fucking friends, Blesk.
She plays a few covers before ending on my favourite—"Hero Boy". She plays it, and every chord rushes the entire length of my veins. I really listen this time…
Every line takes me back.
Through our story.
From beginning to end.
It’s all there.
Fuck. I slump further against the bar, fire burning in my lungs. Breathe, Konnor.
I’m trying to hold myself together, struggling to contain all the emotions radiating from me, when someone pats me on the shoulder. I turn to acknowledge whoever it is, well aware that my eyes are glossy.
“Hey, man,” I say to Jax, wiping my eyes on my sleeve.
He diverts his gaze to the ground like he just saw something he shouldn’t see. “Fuck, Slater. Sort ya self out, will ya?”
“Yeah, I know, right? What a pussy,” I say with a forced huff. I’d be mocking me if I were him.
“Nah, mate. Pussies are useful. You’re more like a... an appendix or something.” He chuckles at his own joke. So do I. “How much have you had to drink today?”
“Not enough.”
He glares at me. “I think that’s a subjective analysis.”
I hold my hand up to signal Jewels to pour me another drink. “I’ve already been limited. Jewels is looking after me.”
Jax nods at the lovely Jewels in appreciation. “She is a good girl, that one.”
“You’d know,” I say, preparing myself for an entertaining interaction between the two of them.
Jewels approaches us. “Jaxon, you still haven’t done anything about that thing on your shoulders.”
He chuckles. “And you look good.”
“Brock keeps me fit enough.”
“Huh, I swear you were fitter when we were together. Maybe you should take me back so I can show you how mattress gymnastics should be performed.”
A flirtatious smile pulls at her lips. “I’ve been trying to get that disgusting five seconds out of my mind for the past six months, and I wouldn’t want to undo all that effort,” she says, before walking off with a slight skip in her step.
Jaxon just smiles harder, before calling out after her, “It took you six months?”
She scoffs, muttering, “That kind of trauma takes a while to get over.”
He watches her lean across the bar and serve another person, then knocks my elbow. “She wants me.”
I crack up. "I doubt it.” Facing the band area again, I’m shocked the stage is already empty. My heart lurches.
Blesk has completely packed up. She didn’t even look out into the crowd once. Now she's gone. Dammit. “Does she usually have a drink after her sets?”
Jaxon looks at the sky as if to search for an answer he doesn’t want to find. “Well, sometimes.”
“What is it?”
He grips my shoulder again. “She usually has a drink afterwards. Someone buys her one or she sits with some people she seems to know from class.”
“What aren’t you telling me?”
“Nothing. It’s just. I saw her getting a bit cosy with this guy last Friday.”
Cosy?
Cosy?
Like hugging her damn phone?
I clench my teeth.
“Calm down. I intercepted her,” he says. “She looked startled to see me, and then I hung out with her the rest of the night…” He sighs. “She wanted to ask about you but didn’t. I could tell, mate.”
“Intercepted? Intercepted what exactly? Seriously, Jax, you being all vague is making this worse. Did he kiss her? Touch her? What happened?”
“His arm was draped around her shoulder. And they were close. Like, if I were her boyfriend, it would have been too close. I couldn’t see much more. When I approached, it was like a bomb went off. They turned into shrapnel.”
Calming breaths.
“Point Casanova out to me. Is he here?” I gesture towards the booths. Every muscle in me is distractingly tight and rigid, and the alcohol is stopping rational thought from entering my mind.
“What are you gonna do?”
“Nothing.” I down the rest of my bourbon and set my glass on the bar. “Have a chat. A nice chat.”
Jaxon lifts his head, squinting over the top of heads until he stops. “Ah. There. Black haired guy.”
I stare at this pretty boy. Too pretty. I glare at the empty spot opposite him, at the two drinks, one half empty, one completely full and untouched. Right… I wander over, ignoring whatever it is Jaxon is trying to say to me.
Grabbing the drink that is opposite him, I slide down into the chair. “Thanks for the drink.”
Yep, I’m an arsehole.
Black Beauty’s eyes widen as I swig from what I can only presume is a drink for Blesk. “K-Konnor,” he stutters. “Right? Your name is Konnor. Well, that wasn’t for you, but I can grab another one.”
I finish her drink, eyeballing him. Setting the empty glass down, I say, “She likes wine. White.”
“What?” He avoids my eyes, pretending he has no idea what I’m talking about.
I spread out my legs, slouch down, and make myself comfortable opposite him. “Blesk. She likes wine. Not whatever cheap fucking rum is in this.”
“It’s Captain Morgan, actually, and I really like it.”
Her voice. I’m completely startled when I hear her soft, melodic cadence coming from the crowd.
I stay still, but my eyes track her as she approaches me with a subtle smile playing on her lips.
And fuck me, gravity, time, space, any quantifiable relevance to moments and places completely cease to exist.
She is so beautiful.
She stops beside the table. “Hi, Mr Slater. You aren’t dead. I thought you ran out of food.”
“I ate the batteries.” I grin at her, and Black Beauty says something, but I’m looking at her, and she’s looking at me.
Her soft smile turns into a bright beam. “I’m glad you aren’t dead, Konnor.”
“Wouldn’t you rather have wine?” I ask. “Over rum, I mean. Wine is so delicious and corny and good looking.”
She giggles, sticking that tongue out between her teeth. “Wine is corny and good looking.” She rolls her eyes before agreeing, “And delicious. But rum is easy.”
I click my tongue and rise to my full height, looking down my lashes at her as I say, “Oh now nothing good ever comes easy, Miss Bellamy.”
She arches her neck, holding my gaze.
I completely don’t care that we are in public, on display, or that the room has gone quiet, and I can feel the press of attention.
I don’t care that Black Beauty is scoffing as if I've just stolen his favourite toy. I don’t care about anything other than her.
I know Elise told me to chill, to bring the obsession down a notch, but I can’t.
It’s who I am. A fucking psycho, like she said.
“Duch.” I grip Blesk’s chin and tilt it upwards. Goddamn, those eyes. “I know you think I only like you because—
“Konnor, stop, I know—”
“No, I need to talk to you about this.”
“Konnor, I know. It’s okay. I was going to come see you soon. I wanted to see you. I want to talk…” She looks left and then right. “In private.”