Chapter Nineteen #2
‘I’m just a little overwhelmed and I let her get the better of me.
The fashion industry is designed for people like her and she knows it.
’ She looked embarrassed and leaned closer to him to explain.
‘My nanna taught me how to make clothes – because she was sick of me crying in dressing rooms whenever we went shopping. Plus-size fashion is a bit better now, but when I was younger nothing fitted properly, or it just looked plain ridiculous on a tall and curvier girl. A sixteen-year-old with E-cups does not need to wear a t-shirt that says Babe in silver sequins.’ She rolled her eyes at her own joke, but he could tell the memories were still painful.
‘Nanna made a point of telling me that it was the clothes that were the problem and not my body. I’ll always love her for doing that.
She took something that hurt me and turned it into a hobby I love.
Honestly, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
A bitchy comment like that normally wouldn’t have bothered me. ’
‘I’m so sorry… for what she said and for the shitty world we live in, and for not understanding sooner.’
Her eyes warmed. ‘You don’t have to understand. You’ve been kind and that’s enough.’
But it wasn’t, was it? ‘Everything is going to be fine,’ he promised.
‘Alex!’ called his mother, sounding a little more panicky this time.
‘Okay, let’s do this,’ said Ellie, raising her chin and stepping out from the shadow of the seating plan.
His mother and Ellie exchanged polite greetings as they settled in their chairs, although he could tell Ellie was uncomfortable.
‘Where’s the happy couple? Shouldn’t they be here by now?’ he asked, unable to keep the snide tone out of his voice.
His mother frowned and his father took a deep sip of his single-malt Scotch.
‘They’ll be down in a minute. So tell me, how did you two meet?’ She posed the question not to him, but to Ellie.
Ellie’s face fell and she lowered her glass slowly. ‘Erm… I gate-crashed his opening-night party.’
Alex’s mother, ever the professional, smiled without missing a beat, the quick glance towards him the only indicator of her surprise.
‘So, you haven’t been together long?’
‘No.’ Ellie paled and looked up at him for reassurance. ‘No, I guess it’s been a bit of a whirlwind.’
His mother’s pleasant expression remained fixed, but her eyes sharpened. ‘I forgot to ask. Do you plan to enter the business at some point?’
Ellie blinked, and Alex added for clarity, ‘Show business.’
He could tell by his mother’s sudden change in demeanour that she was worried.
Even though she would have learned from the security checks that Ellie was a nurse, she still might suspect her of being hungry for fame and using him as a stepping stone to becoming famous – it wouldn’t be the first time.
Several of his previous girlfriends had done that, and in the end he’d switched to only dating women who were already successful within the industry.
But that hadn’t worked out either; Savannah was proof of that.
Ellie looked at him and then his mother and laughed, the joyous smile he’d come to love finally gracing her lips. ‘Me? Oh God, no! As if.’ She swallowed nervously and took a shaky breath. ‘Nothing wrong with it of course… I mean, well… just not my bag. Nursing is enough drama for me.’
His mother paused a moment, obviously surprised.
He could literally see her mind churning: doesn’t everybody want this?
No, he wanted to shout. Not everybody wanted their lives to be lived in public.
He didn’t. Had hated it as a kid, and had fallen into acting anyway – even though he’d always preferred writing and directing.
His mother recovered quickly. ‘Oh, I played a nurse once – Nurse Wahler, or Walker, something like that. It was hard work.’
He rolled his eyes. Sometimes he wondered if she remembered what the real world was actually like. ‘That’s not the same, Mom.’
‘Close enough,’ Ellie said with an unbothered shrug. ‘Was it a film?’
‘No, one of my first TV series actually. A long time ago, when I first started out. We had a lovely doctor and nurse consultant who gave us all the juicy stories.’
‘I bet,’ Ellie said warmly.
But their conversation immediately died when his mother noticed the arrival of Savannah and Liam, sparking a flame of irritation in his chest that their arrival would automatically halt her conversation with Ellie. Although she didn’t seem to mind, and instead looked concerned about him.
Savannah and Liam made their way over to the top table and were greeted by a round of applause from their guests.
Savannah was wearing some baby-pink frothy designer number, and his brother was wearing a linen suit, not dissimilar to his own except it was in the same colour as Savannah’s dress, with a frilly white shirt beneath, and a baby-pink bow tie at the neck.
At that moment, Alex knew with complete certainty that he’d dodged a bullet.
His parents stood and welcomed them both with hugs and air kisses. Savannah’s mother had died a few years ago, and her relationship with her father was strained, so he wasn’t surprised that he hadn’t come.
Alex took a deep breath and, after glancing at Ellie for silent reassurance, they stood.
He gave Savannah’s cheek a quick awkward air kiss and then gave his brother a firm handshake before sitting back down as quickly as possible.
Ellie – incapable of behaving unkindly to anyone – complimented Savannah’s dress and beamed cheerfully at his brother.
As they returned to their seats, his mom and dad remained standing and turned to their audience, commanding the room easily without saying a word.
His father was the first to speak. ‘We are so delighted to welcome you all here for Savannah and Liam’s wedding.
We know some of you have travelled a great distance: Monte Carlo, South Africa and even from Australia – thank you, Margot and Rocco.
I can speak for all of us when I say we are so pleased to have you with us on such a wonderful occasion. ’
His mother spoke next. Neither of his parents had speech cards; the smoothness of their delivery was down to their talent as actors, combined with their close relationship as a couple – a winning team who loved each other deeply.
How had he thought Savannah was the one? Was he truly so blind? Was he falling blindly again with Ellie, with another woman who didn’t really want him?
‘Savannah and Liam are perfect for each other,’ continued his mom.
His dad followed, ‘Anyone can see that, and we are all delighted to welcome Savannah into our family.’
Neither looked at him as they spoke and he got the distinct impression that this was how all of the wedding events would pan out, everyone pretending nothing had happened. His fingers clenched into fists beneath the table and his jaw tightened painfully.
His thoughts, his feelings, ignored as always.
A warm hand was laid on top of his own.
He looked up into the chocolate pools of Ellie’s eyes, and slowly the tension faded away, falling off his shoulders like a heavy coat dropping to the floor.
She understood and she saw him. But she didn’t want him, not really.
Lust was a powerful thing, but love? He’d never managed to get that, not with Savannah or any of his previous flings.
No one stayed; they all got bored, or sought out better opportunities and left him behind, and he’d never missed them.
But Ellie? He knew he would miss her when all of this was over.
‘…which brings me on to our wedding gift.’ His mother beamed indulgently as she passed the couple an envelope.
Liam and Savannah opened it with curious smiles. After a second of confusion, Savannah burst into sobbing tears and jumped up to hug his mom. His dad was given a bear hug by Liam, and Alex tried very hard not to roll his eyes.
‘They’ve gifted us a honeymoon island!’ cried Savannah, wiping gently at her tears with a napkin.
Holly jumped up and down as if she’d won a carnival prize. ‘What, your own island? You have to let me stay!’
His mom chuckled. ‘We told you that we would sort out the honeymoon, and we have. The Bahamas will always have a special place in your hearts and ours, so we thought it only right that you should have your own place here. We hope it’s a special start to a beautiful life together.’
There was more emotional gushing from Savannah, followed by hugs, while the guests watched with captivated gasps of wonder and sentimental sighs.
Ellie squeezed his fingers lightly and he returned the touch, hoping to reassure her. He wasn’t surprised by his parents’ actions. When you’ve bought houses for your kid’s twenty-first birthdays, what else can you buy them as a wedding gift?
An island, of course.
Raw jealousy clawed at his throat and he struggled to swallow it down.
He knew it was a wedding gift and the occasion demanded extravagance.
But, for all their display of familial affection, not one of them had come to see his play.
How could they buy an island for one brother, and not even a plane ticket for the other?
Like salt poured onto an open wound, it hurt like hell, but was also strangely cleansing.
If they didn’t care, why should he?
The bitter rage that had been simmering since his arrival boiled over. He let go of Ellie’s hand and drained his glass in one swig. He then picked up the bottle from the centre of the table and repoured his glass, not caring when some of it sloshed onto the tablecloth.
‘Oh, my babies are going to love it!’ cried Savannah, hugging Alex’s mother once more.
‘Babies?’ asked Ellie quietly.
‘Her dogs,’ Alex replied gruffly, not caring to lower his voice. They could pretend he didn’t exist, but he wasn’t going to make it easy for them.
Savannah glanced their way and giggled nervously. ‘I’ve quite a few… I have a bit of an obsession.’
Alex snorted. ‘That’s putting it mildly.’