Chapter 48 #2
"You may have carried her, but you share no genetic material, no bloodlines, with my daughter. You allowed me to believe I slept with her mother and was unable to recollect who that was. You made me feel guilty and ashamed all this time"
"You did donate to the sperm bank and sign the waiver papers," she points out.
"It was meant to be confidential. You broke that agreement."
She looks like she’s about to protest, then some of the fight seems to go out of her.
"I was desperate. I thought I would be able to bring up my child on my own. But I lost my nerve.” She hunches her shoulders.
“I had been so sure all I wanted was to have a child. But then I held Serene in my arms and knew I knew I couldn’t do it alone.
I was overwhelmed. All my courage deserted me.
Can you imagine how difficult it was to realize that I was mistaken?
” She swallows. “That the one thing I wanted my entire life… I couldn’t go through with it.
I knew I had to find a home for Serene. I had to find someone else to take care of her.
I looked you up, I discovered how well off you were.
I knew you’d make a good father. That she’d be better off with you. "
"Yet, you decided to come back into her life?"
"Because"—she looks away—"I missed her. I found I couldn’t just simply walk away. Not when I’d spent so much of my life wanting a child." She swallows hard. "I did not intend for things to become this messy. I did not intend to turn my daughter’s life upside down."
Tears begin to roll down her cheeks. She looks miserable, yet I can’t find it in myself to sympathize with her. "You're the reason Serene is in the hospital."
"I’m aware"—she sniffs—"and I’m sorry. I truly am."
A thought which has been eating away at my subconscious since I first saw her breaks through. "How did you find out we were here?"
She blinks rapidly. "Would you believe me if I said it was a coincidence?"
I snort. "Not likely."
She looks down, and I have to strain to hear her. "I paid a private investigator to find out where you’d moved. Then paid him again to track where you were headed."
That anger that gripped me intensifies. I don’t broadcast where I live, but I also don’t take pains to hide it or what my travel plans are. There was no need to do so. That changes now.
This woman has maintained an unhealthy interest in the whereabouts of me and daughter. This goes beyond an invasion of privacy. Her actions are downright illegal.
It resulted in my daughter getting hurt. I tamp down on the rage that churns my guts. I need to keep control of my emotions. Serene needs me. My wife needs me. I need to understand Lauren’s motivations better, so I can find a way to keep her away from my family.
"You seem to have a lot of money to spend tracking my movements. You could have used that to take care of Serene, instead."
Her shoulders dip. "I’m not a billionaire.
But yes, I make enough to afford IVF and to get details on your whereabouts.
I will not let you guilt trip me for that.
Nor for my actions. Only I know what I went through.
Only I know how difficult it was to decide to get pregnant on my own, and then realize I needed to give up my daughter so she could have a better future. "
"She’s not a toy that you can give away at will, then decide you want back when you miss her,” I snap.
"I merely wanted her to know who her mother is. Surely, I have a right to that?"
"You lost all rights when you left her with me. And because of that, my daughter will always suffer the consequences of knowing that the woman who gave birth to her abandoned her.”
This woman’s choices are the reason for the trauma my daughter has experienced in her short life.
"And finding out you’re not even her biological mother? That’s just another betrayal she’ll have to live with."
She hunches her shoulders. Her expression deflates. A shadow runs through her eyes. She opens her mouth to speak when Priscilla walks over to join us. Noticing the charged silence, she looks between us.
"Everything okay?" She slips her fingers through mine. "Are you okay?"
Something twisted inside me unfurls. The chaos inside me settles, just a little.
Seeing her, having her by my side, feeling her softness against me, grounds me.
Reassures me I can find my way out of this mess.
I need to keep the faith. I have her with me.
Serene is going to be okay. Serene has to be okay.
I wrap my arm about my wife’s shoulders and pull her close.
Lauren seems to shrink further into herself. She looks miserable, but she’s not getting any sympathy from me. She’s responsible for the upheavals in my daughter’s life. I can’t forgive her for that.
My wife urges me to the side, out of earshot from the other woman.
"I don’t understand or agree with any of her actions.
" She reaches up and cups my cheek. "But it doesn’t change the fact that she gave birth to Serene. Our daughter will want to know that. She’ll likely want Lauren in her life when she’s older. "
I want to deny it. I am tempted to use all the power I have to ensure this woman has nothing to do with my daughter.
But I know my wife is right. She has more perspective on this situation.
She understands how important it is for Serene to have contact with all three of us.
Overcome by emotions I can’t quite put a name to—and don’t want to, at this stage—I settle for lowering my chin and kissing my wife, hard.
I take comfort from her nearness. Her scent.
How she opens herself and allows me to take from her.
How she feels like a rock in this shifting landscape that my life has become.
The sound of someone clearing their throat cuts through the turmoil in my mind. I lift my head and turn around to find the doctor waiting. This time her expression is one of relief.
"Mrs. Davenport’s blood type is compatible with Serene’s."