Chapter 6
Two weeks later, Felicity sat in a kind of stupor as Bex had her wedding dress fitted and Sophie hovered around her, touching all the dresses on the racks and cooing.
Bex and Sophie had always been there for Felicity, her pseudo-family, as she liked to call them.
Since school, the three of them were close-knit, heads together, virtually inseparable.
Gradually, over the years, Felicity’s other friends had drifted away, either fed up of her general grumpiness or put off by her refusal to let anyone get close.
Although she had very little in common with either of them, these two were the only ones that had never abandoned her, never refused to take no for an answer.
Listened endlessly to the same old sad stories about her absent father, her alcoholic mother, her totally miserable upbringing.
Until she met Andrea, they were her only friends in the world.
Her only family to speak of. Her only anything.
When she and Adam split up that first time, not long after she went to university, Bex and Sophie dropped everything to come up to campus and visit her.
They sat up all night while she cried. Bex stayed on for two weeks, sleeping on the floor in her dorm room.
Helping her pick up the shattered pieces of her heart.
Bringing her dodgy kebabs from the shop at the end of the road.
Sophie and Bex had been amazing during that time.
It never even occurred to her that they might not be good for her.
That it was something you could pick and choose.
That there might be other friends out there.
Friends who didn’t sleep with her ex-boyfriends for a start.
A fresh wave of nausea washed over her. No wonder Bex had been so keen for her and James to get together. It left her and Adam free to finally see if things were working between them. It left them free to get engaged. Eugh.
‘You okay, Fliss?’ said Sophie, who was now standing, hands on hips, staring down at her.
‘Oh, yes. Fine. Sorry.’
Sophie flopped down into the chair beside her.
‘Don’t be sorry, you just look a bit pale, that’s all.’
‘I’m fine.’
Sophie squeezed her hand. ‘Doesn’t she look amazing?’ she said, nodding towards Bex.
‘Hmmm? Oh, yes. Beautiful.’
And she did. Bex’s long dark hair was brushed to perfection, flowing down the back of a tight-fitted deep-red corset, overlaid with lace, leading into a long cream silk skirt.
She looked like a model. Felicity had always felt slightly awkward next to Bex, never more so than now.
She was shorter, rounder, paler. She made a mental note not to stand too close to Bex on the dreaded wedding day.
Maybe she could be the type of maid of honour who stood at the back of the church instead? Was that a thing?
‘What do you think, ladies?’ said Bex, as if reading her thoughts, swirling to face them, dress following her movements with an elegant swish, swish.
‘Teal is the way to go,’ said Felicity.
‘I meant about the dress.’
‘You look stunning,’ said Felicity and Sophie practically in unison.
Bex narrowed her eyes. ‘Have you two been rehearsing that?’
‘Only for half an hour or so,’ Sophie said and laughed lightly.
‘Well, thank you kindly.’ Bex gave a low curtsey, then put her hand to her chest and giggled. As she lifted her head, something caught her eye through the enormous window behind them, and she squealed in delight.
‘What is he doing here? Tell him to get lost, would you? It’s bad luck, it’s bad luck.’
She was still squealing and muttering about bad luck as she disappeared into the changing cubicle.
Sophie and Felicity looked at each other, then turned slowly to peer out of the window.
Sure enough, there was Adam, hands in his pockets, perfect grin on his stupidly perfect face.
Not in the least bothered about bad luck, it seemed.
Felicity’s stomach sank towards the floor.
They intercepted him outside.
‘You can’t be here,’ said Sophie, hand on his chest, pushing him gently back from the door as he laughed. ‘Impossible man.’
Felicity hung back, feeling almost shy. It was the first time she’d actually seen Adam in person since he and Bex had got engaged. Although she knew it was inevitable she’d see him at some point, somehow she hadn’t prepared herself for it to be today.
‘Felicity,’ said Adam, nodding at her, his hands still in his pockets, that infuriating look on his stupid handsome face.
‘Adam,’ she managed to squeak.
‘How have you been?’
‘Fine thanks,’ she said, looking at the floor.
A bit like the sun, it was always better if you didn’t look directly at Adam, Felicity had found.
Previously that was so she didn’t accidentally sleep with him.
Now it was more so she could resist the urge to stab him in the eye with a pencil.
Looking back, it was hard to imagine what she’d ever seen in him.
Once he had been the person who absorbed all her thoughts, who her universe revolved around.
All she could see now was someone she knew she could never trust. Not even an inch. A shudder ran down her spine.
‘Good. Good to see you.’
Was it her imagination or did his voice give way a little as he said it?
‘That’s quite enough of that,’ Sophie cut in. ‘Adam, you can’t be here. It’s bad luck.’
‘That’s nonsense.’
‘It’s not nonsense,’ Felicity found herself saying. ‘It’s tradition.’
‘Since when have you ever cared about things like tradition?’ Adam’s voice was cutting all of a sudden.
‘I…’ Felicity was speechless.
‘It’s tradition,’ said Sophie, firmly. ‘Now get lost.’
‘I’m entitled to see my fiancée if I want,’ said Adam, still staring at Felicity. She willed herself not to be cowed. To hold her shoulders back. To look him in the eye. But all she wanted to do was run.
‘You are, yes, but just not right now, okay?’ Sophie was clearly on a losing wicket.
‘It’s okay, it’s okay,’ came a voice from behind them. Bex had got changed in double-quick time and was back in her usual classy ensemble day clothes, Chanel or at least a decent imitation, hair only the teeniest tiny bit dishevelled. ‘He’s taking me to lunch.’
‘Well, why didn’t you say?’ said Sophie, her voice a little frosty.
‘I’ve gone for it, girls. That’s the one. The woman’s put it aside for me. Felicity, maybe you wouldn’t mind collecting it once it’s all adjusted.’
‘It looked like it fit fine to me,’ said Felicity, quietly.
Bex put a hand on her chest. ‘Oh, did you think so? It was a little too big, what a pain. And I’d gone for the smallest one they had too, can you believe it?’
Felicity and Sophie murmured assent as Bex put her arm through Adam’s and they sauntered off together. She even managed to resist giving a smug smile back over her shoulder as she went, which, in the circumstances, was admirable really, thought Felicity.
‘At least she’s trying not to rub my nose in it,’ she said, when Bex and Adam were out of earshot.
‘You think?’ Sophie said with a laugh.
‘Nope. Since when did she turn into such a knob? Has she always been this bad?’
Sophie shrugged. ‘I’m sure she can’t have been, can she?’
‘I mean, I know I’m not the best judge of character going,’ said Felicity, with a wry smile, ‘but I’m sure even I would have noticed that.’
‘Come on, Fliss, we’re free for the afternoon. Let’s go do something fun.’
‘Hide under a duvet?’ said Felicity miserably.
‘Nope. We’re going shopping. Retail therapy is just what you need.’
‘Even worse.’
‘Where’s your sense of adventure?’
‘How is going shopping for clothes an adventure?’
‘Well, that’s exactly where you’re wrong, my friend. You’ll see.’
‘I seriously doubt that.’
An hour later and Felicity was laden down with Sophie’s bags of purchases, sitting on a chair in the changing room feeling like a long-suffering boyfriend.
‘How is this meant to be helping, exactly?’ she said, as Sophie came out of the cubicle and did the little back and forth wiggle-dance that only ever happens in a changing room.
‘Go and buy something,’ said Sophie with a laugh. ‘Retail therapy only works if you actually hand over some of that hard-earned cash.’
‘Are you forgetting I work for a charity? I never have any cash.’
‘Oh, Fliss, stop being such a grump. You never spend anything on yourself.’
‘Sorry, just didn’t bank on seeing Adam today.’
‘Even more reason to treat yourself,’ said Sophie.
Sophie did another twirl and the pink-and-cream skirt she was trying on swirled out around her. ‘Also, sorry. I hadn’t thought. I should have asked you. How was that?’
‘Weird. Annoying.’
‘He’s still handsome though, eh?’
‘How can you say that, Soph? When I look at him now, all I see is his Big Fat Betrayal.’
‘Betrayal but also those dark eyes. That smile.’
‘Like Tom Cruise, I always thought. Combined with Dev Patel, we used to say.’ Felicity sighed inwardly.
‘Who?’
‘That handsome Asian actor?’
‘Ooh yes. I can see why you guys fancied Adam, I must say. Pearly white teeth too.’
‘Soph, you’re really not helping. Get that one.’
Sophie looked down. ‘Do you think?’
‘Yes, it suits you. Not the top though. Too plain.’
‘I do like the way it swirls.’
‘And then please can we get going? I need to go and lick my wounds in peace.’
Sophie nodded. ‘I just need to go to one more shop.’
Felicity let out a groan.