Chapter 53
When she was finally satisfied that he’d actually gone downstairs, Felicity sat down at the little table, but her appetite had vanished.
I’ll eat a bit later, she thought, and then hurried into the bathroom to do her make-up. What on earth was she meant to be making herself up for, for goodness’ sake? Surely that wasn’t a wedding dress, was it?
Felicity pulled it over her head and nearly gasped out loud at the sight of herself in the mirror.
The satin creation fit her perfectly, accentuating her minimal curves the best it could and even giving her a tiny bit of cleavage, which was unheard of.
This must be Sophie’s influence, she thought.
James was good but even he wasn’t that good.
Her hands were shaking as she brushed and dried her hair and found a hair clip to pin it up on one side, the most effort she ever went to.
When she’d finally completed a frantic transformation, her eye turned to the food.
Just one mouthful, she thought.
She piled her fork high with a combination of egg, beans and tomato, and very carefully brought it up to her mouth. At the last moment, a lump of egg wobbled off and dropped down the front of the dress and Felicity let out a little scream.
‘What?’ came a voice from outside. James was still bloody out there, wasn’t he?
‘Don’t come in, don’t come in, everything’s fine,’ said Felicity, frantically rushing to the bathroom and locking the door.
‘Do you need me?’ came James’s voice, more distant now.
‘No, bugger off,’ she yelled.
‘Are you sure?’
‘Go downstairs, will you!’
Felicity looked in the mirror, aghast. Her beautiful cream silk dress now had a trail of egg yolk down the front of it.
‘Bugger, bugger, bugger,’ she said, staring at her own reflection. ‘You bloody idiot, Felicity, now you’ve done it.’
‘Room clean,’ came a distant voice from the door. Higher pitched this time.
Felicity threw open the bathroom door in a panic. ‘I know that’s still you,’ she yelled. ‘Stop pretending to be a cleaning lady.’
At that, the door opened and an actual cleaning lady stuck her head in. She was elderly and her face was lined and pale.
‘Are you okay, my dear?’
‘Oh, I’m sorry, I thought you were…’ Felicity couldn’t even finish the sentence. Tears began rolling down her cheeks.
The woman looked down at her dress and let out a little yelp.
‘Oh, good Lord. What have you done?’
‘It’s egg,’ said Felicity, her face crumpling. ‘I don’t know what to do.’
Like some kind of miraculous fairy godmother, the woman rushed forwards, waving her hands frantically. ‘Don’t touch it,’ she said. ‘And whatever you do, don’t put hot water on it. Just trust me, okay? Wait here.’
She rushed out of the room. Still sniffing, Felicity stuck her head out of the corridor behind her but thankfully, James was nowhere to be seen. But she knew it was only a matter of time before she’d have to come clean, pun intended.
He’s going to kill me, she thought, sitting down on the bed despondently.
Why was she such a klutz? Fair enough, James had known this practically from the start, when she properly fell over right in front of him on their first proper date and he had to patch up her knee with a sticking plaster, but this? This took the biscuit.
Five long minutes later, the lady was back, carrying a tray of cleaning products.
‘Right, off with the dress,’ she said, coming over and pulling it straight over Felicity’s head.
Felicity was too shocked to even object. She wrapped her arms around herself to disguise the teeny tiny underwear she was barely wearing.
‘You,’ said the woman, tucking the dress carefully over her arm and pointing at the congealing breakfast by the window, ‘You eat while I sort this out.’
Felicity opened her mouth and out came a sob she wasn’t expecting.
The woman’s face softened. She had hazel eyes and dark-grey hair swept off her face. She stepped forwards and put a hand on Felicity’s cheek. She seemed nice but clearly had no boundaries whatsoever. Felicity was very conscious she was barely clothed.
‘It’s going to be okay,’ said the woman. ‘You’ll see. You are going to look perfect.’
Felicity nodded, choking back a sob and also resisting the temptation to take a step backwards.
The fairy godmother lady gave her arm a squeeze and then turned and vanished into the bathroom with the dress, leaving Felicity shivering in her underwear and wondering what the hell was happening and why she couldn’t just follow simple instructions.
She took a mouthful of toast and chewed rapidly. James was going to kill her.
‘Ta-da,’ came a voice from over her shoulder as she finished eating.
Felicity spun, and her mouth dropped open.
The woman was laying the dress out on the bed. Not a jot of egg yolk in sight.
‘It’s a Christmas miracle,’ she said, turning to Felicity and giving her a massive smile.
‘How the hell did you do that?’ said Felicity, leaping to her feet and giving her a huge hug. ‘Also, thank you, and what’s your name by the way?’
The woman laughed lightly. ‘It’s Anna,’ she said. ‘And you’re more than welcome. I used to be a dry cleaner, can you tell? I know all the tricks. Just never put anything hot on an egg stain or you’ll cook it into the fabric.’
‘Gross,’ said Felicity.
‘That’s nothing compared to some of the sights I’ve seen, my dear.’
Felicity hopped from foot to foot. ‘I bet. I really want to hear those stories too but right now…’
‘We need to wipe that ketchup off your face and get you dressed.’
Felicity scrubbed frantically at her cheek. ‘Yes please,’ she said. And then, ‘I am an adult, honest.’
Anna laughed again, a lovely tinkling sound. ‘I believe you. And soon to be a married one if this dress is anything to go by.’
As Felicity got dressed, she told Anna the whole story of how she’d met her Penguin Man and as much as she knew of what was happening now – which wasn’t much.
By the end, Anna left the room clapping her hands together excitedly, determined to tell everyone in the hotel what was going on. So much for the surprise.