Chapter Forty-Seven
Gualtiero
Ella’s rhythmic breathing isn’t enough to lull me to sleep tonight. I hold her tight against my body, nuzzling my nose into her hair. With my eyes closed, I breathe her in.
She’s used a different shampoo, something more floral than the vanilla I grew used to in Italy, but beneath it, it’s unmistakably her.
I’ve got her back.
Thank you.
I want to drink in this moment. Bottle it. Carry it with me forever.
Last night, this same wave of gratitude was there too, but it was drowned beneath my unsated need for this woman.
I can’t claim I’m satisfied now. I will never be. But tonight, I let her sleep.
She needs it after everything that happened today.
The fight with Rhia took its toll on my angel, not just because of her fall. The memory still pulls me taut from the inside.
One moment she was upright. The next, she was crumpled on the frozen wood, clutching her arm, fear in her eyes.
I have never moved so fast in my life.
The sound she made when I touched her arm still echoes in my head. The way she looked at me, terrified that she had hurt our child, will haunt me for a long time.
It pleases me that she and Rhia made up tonight. Truly. Even if part of me knows my life would be simpler if that woman weren’t in it.
But simpler isn’t what I want.
What makes Ella happy is what matters. If that means I have to tolerate her friends, so be it.
Mateo’s words from weeks ago drift into my mind.
How will you keep her?
I need to finalize my plans to leave it all behind. The role that was chosen for me long before I ever understood what it meant, my legacy and my birthright.
I told her I would do it. And I will.
Lately, it has felt less like power and more like a burden. One I carry out of habit rather than conviction. There’s no joy in what I do each day, only obligation.
This woman in my arms is my joy. Everything else fades beside her.
I’d do anything for her.
A quiet chuckle escapes me. It strikes me then that she’s the most powerful person in my world.
And she doesn’t even know it.
I need to talk to Mateo.
I’ve sent him a message saying I’ve got Ella back, but I need to update him on what’s been happening. More importantly, I need to prepare him for what’s coming soon.
He needs time to digest it.
I check my watch and calculate the time difference. Mateo should be up by now.
Reluctantly, and with as much care as possible, I ease myself away from my sleeping angel, careful not to jostle her cast arm. I take my phone and head to the bathroom, turning on the shower for background noise.
I sit on the closed lid of the toilet and dial my brother’s number. He answers after a few rings, his voice light and unguarded. Happy.
He has finally found his love, and I’m so thrilled for him.
We exchange updates for a moment, until the conversation naturally slows. He offers me the opening without meaning to.
And I take it.
“I can’t believe you’re really going to be a father. It’s what you wanted for so long.”
“Teo, what I feel…” My hands curl into fists as I search for the words. “It’s happiness. And it’s the first time in my life I’ve truly known it. Now that I have Ella back, and we have a baby on the way…” I pause, letting the truth settle before I say it. “I’m complete.”
The words fit.
They redraw the shape of my future. Everything before it now seems like preparation.
“I love Ella more than anything in the world,” I continue. “Those weeks she was gone… I was gone too.”
“You were. I was worried about you. But I get it now,” he says, and this time I hear it. Real understanding. “Love really does change everything.”
The thought amuses me. If anyone overheard this conversation, they’d never believe what we usually spend our time doing. Our enemies would have a field day.
“Yes,” I chuckle.
But then my tone shifts, growing serious. “A man can’t say he loves a woman unless he’s willing to give her everything she needs, make sacrifices. Men like us don’t do this just for anyone.”
I let my meaning sink in.
“We only do it for someone we can’t live without. Ella is that person for me.”
“Why are you telling me this?” he asks, already sensing what is coming, even as part of him resists it.
He waits, saying nothing more.
“I’m tired of our life, Teo,” I murmur. “We were born into this family and trained to be who we are. We’ve never known anything else.
“It took Ella turning everything upside down for me to see it clearly. Looking back at my life before her, I merely existed.”
My voice remains slow, deliberate. I want him to hear every word.
“I became head of la famiglia at twenty-four. I never questioned it, just accepted the role as inevitable, as duty. Not once did I stop to ask myself what I wanted out of life.”
I pause only briefly before continuing.
“Even finding Ella, I treated it the same way. As something destined. Papà raised us believing there was one woman meant for each of us. But I never expected my One to challenge me. To refuse to fit into the shape that was prepared for her.”
A little laugh slips out.
“Mamma loved Papà deeply. But she was also the perfect Mafia wife. Obedient. Content to follow whatever path Papà chose. I’d assumed that would be my future as well.”
The image dissolves almost as soon as it forms.
“The idea of Ella as an obedient wife is laughable,” I say. “She fought me every step of the way. And it forced me to see that there were other possibilities beyond the life we inherited.”
He remains silent, listening. Letting me speak.
“We were raised to be unwaveringly loyal to our family, to the De Marco name, and to everything our forefathers built,” I say. “But Teo, there is more to life than carrying forward someone else’s vision. Have you ever stopped to ask yourself what you truly want?”
He doesn’t reply. I continue, because I know the answer.
“I never did. Not until Ella ran because of who I am.
“I can’t give her what she wants out of life. Not in our world.”
I pause, choosing my next words with care.
“I want to build a life with her, have a dozen babies, and just be happy.”
There’s no hesitation when I say it.
“I’m going to leave la famiglia.”
Even through the phone, I can feel his shock.
I know it can’t come as a complete surprise. I’ve laid the groundwork before, dropped hints he chose not to examine too closely. But hearing the words spoken aloud changes everything.
“Tiero, you can’t be serious.”
“I’m sorry for the burden I’m placing on your shoulders.”
“Fuck,” Teo mutters. “How do you expect me to go on without you? We have always done this together. I never wanted to be Don.”
“Then don’t be.” My answer probably comes as another shock to him. “I’ve learned something these past months. Teo, you need to do the things that make you happy. This family business we inherited and maintain is not among them.”
He lets out a bitter laugh and repeats the words we’ve heard all our lives.
“You’re born into la famiglia, and you’ll die in it.”
I don’t back down.
“There is always a way,” I tell him. “And I’m paving it. Not just for me, but for you too.”
He hesitates. “What do you mean?”
“If you ever want out, I left an encrypted thumb drive hidden in the wall behind the bathroom vanity in Ella’s room. You’ll need the two lock combinations we created for the tree house.”
We’ve both known those numbers since we were kids. The memory hits me like a flash. The two of us running wild, guarding secrets that felt larger than the world. It was a lifetime ago.
“This wouldn’t be an overnight disappearance,” I continue. “It would require planning. Precision. And absolute secrecy. Nobody can know. Nobody.”
The silence that follows stretches long.
I don’t fill it.
“I can’t leave,” he says at last. “What would happen to our businesses? Our family legacy?”
“They’d fall to the wolves,” I reply, flat and unembellished.
I’ve had far more time to live with this truth than he has. To him, stepping away feels like betrayal. Of our name and the generations who built what we now command.
“If you decide to stay,” I continue, “you’ll need to claim your position fully. There’s no room for leniency or mercy. You can’t allow even the smallest hint of weakness, because it will be used against you.”
The weight of what I’m planning to leave behind settles. My brother is the only family I have left. Walking away from him is the hardest decision I’ve ever made.
“I want you to be happy.”
He doesn’t respond, but I know he hears the truth in it.
“Loyalty to la famiglia was carved into you from birth. Only you can untangle what you want from what you were taught to believe.”
I pause before finishing.
“But there is another way. I believe that with everything I am.”