Chapter 10
A hand swept down my side, and I smiled.
My eyes popped open when a hand covered my mouth. I rolled in the bed and looked up at Carmine.
My painting was above the bed.
A dream.
I relaxed and nodded, resting back.
We stared at each other, the events of the last day running between us. Tyran had confiscated my blue gems. As far as I could tell, he didn’t know about the others. I hadn’t mentioned them, and he hadn’t asked. Did he even know what the gems were for?
I might have fobbed my way through that interrogation simply because Tyran hadn’t wanted to show his ignorance.
Carmine’s eyes were shadowed. He traced my face, and if thunderclouds could hover over a person, then they’d hover over him.
They hovered in him too.
My trapped mate.
I lifted a hand to reciprocate, tracing the angles and planes of his face. He rested a finger against my lips, and when our gazes met again, I nodded.
Don’t speak.
Carmine lowered his head and touched his lips to mine. A light touch, immediately followed by a deeper pressure that spoke of his craving. I met it with my own. Our hunger was mutual.
I weaved my fingers into the hair at the base of his neck and angled my head. He rolled me toward him, and I shivered at his caress down my spine.
Moans clamored in my throat to be free.
I broke off the kiss and covered my mouth, breathing hard to recover. Carmine’s chest rose and fell as he looked at me.
Me.
And I looked at the real him.
I have a plan to free you.
He frowned, and I blinked.
I have a plan to free you.
Carmine’s focus shot to me. He touched a hand to his temple.
My mouth dried. No way. Can you hear me?
He nodded, then frowned again.
A little? I asked.
He paused, then nodded. Hear…
His voice was barely audible in my mind. But even though I wouldn’t have said my thoughts had their own voice, I definitely recognized that his voice was a visitor.
I licked my lips. What did this mean?
Another mating gift. But why here? Why so weak?
Oh. Because of Tyran. Do you think he can hear us? I focused hard on Carmine and the words I wished to convey.
Carmine shook his head. Don’t… shouldn’t… until… wake.
My brows creased. We shouldn’t say much until we know?
He nodded, looking slightly confused.
We gazed at each other again, and I could see one million questions and explanations in his eyes, just as I felt all of mine bursting to get out. If we could converse in these dreams, that could change everything.
I could finally hear his side of events. Tyran had lived in him for at least two decades. Carmine must have ideas and information to help me.
More than that, I wanted to know him. I’d never been allowed to just know Carmine. Without the ice. Without the monster.
My breath hitched, and I lifted a hand to rest it against his face. His attention roamed over my features, and he appeared almost confused.
Because I was here fighting for him? Because I believed in him?
Yes to both of those. And I hadn’t done either for a long time and never in full knowledge of the facts. I’d abandoned him to Tyran for three years. Not that I blamed myself for that—I’d had our son to safely raise. I’d gone on the only details I had at the time.
In hindsight, I could see that Carmine had confessed the truth of murdering my family to drive me away. His words when I returned to fight in Tiers… “Why did you return? You escaped, and now I will never let you go, not now I have seen what you are.”
He must’ve been furious to see me again. Despairing. What he’d really been saying was “Why did you return? I found the strength to drive you away, and now he’ll never let you go, not now he’s seen what you are.”
I’d misinterpreted so many of our interactions. He’d let me do that to protect me. Only recently, had Carmine made the odd comment that made me feel he’d decided the answer may rest in me uncovering the truth.
We might not be able to speak or speak in our minds until we knew whether Tyran could hear too. But this moment was too big to wake from. I was seeing Carmine for the first time, and he was seeing me in full knowledge of his predicament for the first time.
I kissed him again and trailed my fingers over his abdomen, pausing every so often to trace over one of our mating designs.
He stopped breathing when I took hold of his erection and began to slowly pump my hand up and down the length.
Carmine closed his eyes, resting his forehead against mine. I paused to tug down my underwear, leaving my camisole on.
With his forehead still pressed to mine, Carmine shifted on top of me and hooked my legs over his arms. I guided him to my entrance, and we inhaled together.
He eased in, and I clutched at his forearms as we both quit breathing.
Carmine slowly pulled back, and we exhaled together before he slid forward again. Bliss. My hands found his jaw, but we otherwise remained with our foreheads touching, both of us perhaps feeling that our hold on our volume was a fine balance.
Instead, I settled for staring into his eyes, and he settled for the same. I watched the slight roll of them each time he pushed in. I relished the mounting heat in them as he witnessed the crinkle of my eyes.
We hadn’t made love in… Had we ever made love? Really? Because me not knowing about the tyrannical demon controlling him seemed to erase everything we’d shared prior. The intimacies we’d shared since my return? A result of loss of control or transactional—me completing a ritual, in other words.
This was making love. With my mate.
Who I believed in.
Tears leaked from my eyes, and he kissed each of them away. Carmine rested a hand over my heart, and his large hand covered most of my chest.
We were together at last.
This was the Carmine that I might win for immortality. Might. Fear filled me all at once, and my body couldn’t decide whether it shook due to pleasure or terror. They combined, and it took everything in me not to gasp through Carmine’s final few, less-controlled pumps.
I could lose this.
I might have lost this battle without ever knowing what a mating bond truly felt like.
Now I couldn’t decide if it would’ve been better to never know. This dream could prove to be a wrath curse all of my own.