Leviathan
Through my window, I had a distant view of the clearing at the edge of town. I watched as two figures—tiny at this distance—fought each other. One wolf, one human. The wolf was winning every round.
I still had some anger from the night before.
That June could do something this rash, this dangerous, and put herself in harm’s way like this was beyond anything I could imagine Naphele doing.
My first mate had always been careful and calculated in her decisions.
She’d been a fighter, a warrior, but she’d always approached every fight with a cool head and a plan.
The night before, I’d stalked around my cabin, going over everything that had happened. Not just during the party, but prior to that. Each thing that went before it. Each and every piece of evidence pointed me in a direction I didn’t want to go.
“Did you fall asleep over there?” Rainier asked. “You’ve been staring out that window for, like, thirty minutes.”
Tearing my eyes from June, I turned to look at my friend. Rainier sat on the couch, eyeing me like I was a puzzle he was trying to figure out.
“I don’t like that look on your face,” he said at last.
Slumping down in the chair opposite him, I gave a low growl of irritation. “It’s the look of a pissed-off man.”
“Pissed at Eugenia, I hope?”
“Partly,” I muttered.
Rainier leaned forward, looking confused. “You can’t possibly still be mad at June.”
He’d arrived early that morning and found me at the kitchen table, drinking coffee, but unwilling to discuss the night before. He hadn’t pushed, but simply hung around while I stewed on my emotions.
“I am,” I admitted. “I can’t understand why she wouldn’t be more careful. Eugenia is going to kill her. You and I both know that. It’s too impulsive.”
Unbidden, memories of Naphele swirled up in my mind.
A warrior queen. A fighter and a thinker.
She’d commanded respect and loyalty. She never would have gone into something dangerous without a strategy to survive.
In all honesty, that crazy woman leading the Red Maw was more like Naphele than June was.
The biggest difference was that both Naphele and June were kinder and more caring than Desdemona seemed.
“That’s true, but you didn’t leave her a lot of options there, bro,” Rainier said, shaking his head and chuckling ruefully.
“I swear to God,” I growled, “if one more person tells me she had to accept that challenge, I’m going to scream.”
“Well, she did, man. First off, you can’t really decline a challenge of that nature. Not in the shifter world. If she had, she’d have been branded a coward. No one in the pack would have respected her. That’s at best. At worst, she’d have had to leave.”
“I would never banish her,” I said, my voice growing louder, objecting to the very idea.
“I know you wouldn’t, but the pack would have all but turned their back on June. She’d have been given the cold shoulder for refusing. She would have been banished in all but name. If I had to guess, it would have been too psychologically devastating, and she’d have run off eventually.”
“But I would have worked it out,” I said, putting my hands out like I was begging. “I would have smoothed it over with Eugenia and the pack. I’d have made them see—”
“Stop,” Rainier said. I clamped my jaw shut.
I wasn’t used to receiving commands from my beta.
Yet, I did exactly that, keeping quiet as he spoke.
“You are the best alpha I’ve ever known, but you’ve become blinded by trying to find Naphele’s reincarnation and falling in love with her.
You’ve latched on to June, and you want to shout from the rooftops that you’re in love with her, and she’s your fated mate.
I commend that, I really do, but it’s made it hard for you to see the big picture. ”
I wanted to retort, to argue, to tell him to shut his mouth and follow my orders because I was the alpha.
The problem was, I wasn’t that kind of alpha.
I’d chosen Rainier as my beta because he was a good man, a smart man.
He could see the world better than I could, especially since I’d spent so much time in my wolf form over the decades.
“What’s the big picture?” I asked.
“It’s this pack,” Rainier responded. “You’ve brought all these people together to create something. You put a lot of work in, and you deserve to have love. You deserve June. You can’t forget that. All of us, including June, are part of this pack. Naphele is gone. That’s a fact you can’t deny.”
“I know that,” I said, a slight tremor in my voice as my anger gave way to guilt.
“Then why are you acting like this?” He asked.
Shame welled up inside me. “What if June isn’t Naphele’s reincarnation? What if it’s really true that she isn’t?”
“Is this still about you wanting a dead woman over a live one?” Rainier sounded almost disgusted at the thought.
I shook my head. “No, that’s not it,” I said, my shoulders sagging.
“I’m still not sure either way. Not a hundred percent.
One minute I see similarities, then the next I don’t.
Like today. I’m ready to be with June. I want to be with her, whether she’s Naphele’s reincarnation or not. I can admit that.”
“Then what the hell is the problem?” Rainier asked. He held his hands out, and sounded exhausted.
“Because, if I’m with June, what happens if I find Naphele’s actual reincarnation?
What then? When we see each other, the bond will be obvious.
I can’t deny this mating bond I have with June; it’s too powerful not to be real, but I’m terrified I will stumble upon Naphele again.
What happens then? Be with both? That’s cruel and unfair to all involved.
I’m not doing that. I’d have to choose, and I don’t know if I could. ”
“What you need to know,” Rainier said, “and it’s something I’ve thought but never told you, is that if June isn’t your lost mate remade, then you may never find her.
You and I know how fickle reincarnation is.
For all you know, she could have been reincarnated in China, or the middle of Africa.
If that’s true, the odds of you two running across each other would basically be impossible. ”
“But we loved each other so much,” I said, and I was angry that my eyes stung with tears. “If I died first, I know my soul would have done anything to stay near her, to seek her out and be reborn somewhere near her.”
Rainier gave me a pitying look. “Levi, if it’s meant to be, then it’s meant to be.
Maybe you aren’t meant to find her in this lifetime.
Maybe it’ll be the next, or the one after, or ten lifetimes later.
You have June now. You have her, and the chance to actually live your life, rather than running through the forest in your wolf form every day, waiting for something to happen when it already did. ”
I opened my mouth to respond, but a sharp knock on the door interrupted me. Heaving a sigh, I stood and went to answer it. Brianna, a woman I’d rescued a few years ago, stood on my porch.
“Yes?” I said.
“I came to tell you about Eugenia and June,” she said.
A flutter of fear roiled in my stomach. “What about them?”
“The challenge has been set. Tomorrow at dusk.”
So soon? It made sense. Eugenia would want to force the issue as soon as possible. I still hadn’t figured out what to do if she won. It was a lawful challenge, and by winning, I’d be obligated—though not forced—to take her as my mate. And if I chose not to, the pack would more than likely splinter.
“Okay, where will it be? I’ll try to get there early,” I said.
Brianna blinked at me in confusion. “Uh…you won’t be there.”
“She’s right,” Rainier said from behind me. “This isn’t an alpha challenge where the whole pack is there. A mate challenge is only witnessed by the women of the pack.”
“Shit.” I’d forgotten that. “All right. Thank you, Brianna.”
When I closed the door, a whole new fear had begun to take hold in my stomach. I looked at Rainier, hoping for some solace, or a kind word, but he looked as terrified as I felt.