Juniper
Stocking shelves in my grandparents’ secondhand store gave me a strange sense of nostalgia mixed with déjà vu.
Outside, the weather was unseasonably warm, drifting up to the high fifties, and I’d spotted some daffodils starting to peek out of the ground on the way over.
That, along with the bluegrass music Gran always played during store hours, made it hard not to smile to myself as I worked.
This was what I’d wanted: a peaceful life helping my grandparents.
This day had done more to make me feel like I was back home than anything else.
“Sweetheart, can you grab that box of paperback books from the back?” Gran asked as she stood near the cash register. “I’d like to put them on display at the window. Melinda Walker brought them over. Her aunt passed, and the woman had a huge collection. She’s gonna bring more boxes over tomorrow.”
“Sure thing,” I said, straightening the pile of shirts I’d folded.
In the back room, I found a big cardboard box right by the donation door.
I pulled out the first book. The cover was a picture of a woman in Victorian dress, her cleavage bulging out, and a muscular man standing behind her, his huge bicep wrapped around her midsection, and his face close to her neck. The title was Nights with a Prince.
“Oh my.” I dug through the other books and began to laugh. “Looks like Melinda’s aunt was a woman after my own heart.”
A book called Wicked Lust caught my eye, and I tucked it into my purse before carrying the box out front.
I’d slip it back into the display once I’d read it.
After my time with Levi—and the great sex I’d had with him—the last several weeks had been…
lacking in that area. Reading some smut might help get me by, especially since Anders was growing increasingly insistent on speeding things up.
Ever since I’d turned down his crude offer to fuck, he’d been dropping subtle hints at wanting to try some things out.
My body was still not responding to him.
There was simply no spark between us. Once we went through with the mating ceremony, I’d be forced to consummate the relationship, but until then, I was determined to work up the courage to do it, and to convince myself that it wouldn’t be that bad when the time eventually came.
A lot of people ended up matched with someone they didn’t know or didn’t find attractive in that way, but they eventually grew to care for, and even love, their mate.
All I had to do was hope that happened for me.
As I stepped back out onto the sales floor, I froze when I saw Anders leaning against the counter and chatting to Gran. It was like he’d been summoned by my very thoughts.
“Anders, what are you doing here?”
“Just chatting with this wonderful lady,” he said, nodding at my grandmother. “Came in and saw all these things. Had to ask about them.”
He gestured to the occult display Gran had set up a week ago. An antique Ouija board, incense holders, pentagram necklaces, and a stack of ancient tarot cards my grandfather had picked up at an estate sale a few months back.
“Got us talking about local legends and stuff. Like our friend Leviathan Cross,” Anders said, almost but not quite sneering at the name as he said it. “Mister boogeyman, the Demon Wolf himself.”
“I was telling Anders how the sight runs in your Grandpa’s family,” Gran said.
Anders snorted. “I didn’t think people still believed in that hocus pocus shit anymore.”
“It’s not hocus pocus,” Gran said, looking a little disappointed. “It was real. One of the ancient shifter gifts.”
Anders rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. I mean, everyone’s heard of it, sure, but I doubt we have people who can really see the past or future or whatever. Shit, let me give you a hand with that box.” He hurried over, holding his arms out to take the collection of books.
“Oh, no. I’ve got it. It’s no big—”
“Wow.” Anders let out a hearty laugh as he looked into the box. “Dirty Sexy Nights in Morocco? A Duke’s Mistress? This looks like some spicy stuff. Mrs. Hollis, you surprise me. I like the way your store is branching out.”
Gran’s face went red, and she hurried over to glance into the box, clamping her hand to her mouth as she saw the covers. “Oh, goodness. I didn’t realize… Well, I suppose they’ll sell regardless. Dear, maybe we shouldn’t put them in the window display. Maybe tuck them in the corner over there?”
“Sure, Gran,” I said, hauling the box to the opposite end of the store. Anders followed. “So, what brings you by?” I asked, giving him my most winning smile—at least, that’s what I hoped it looked like.
Anders took the box from me and put it down on the counter.
He leaned his hip against it and crossed his arms. He glanced toward Gran.
She had her back toward us as she worked on a display by the cash register.
Once he saw she wasn’t looking, the smile fled from his face, and his eyes turned dark and menacing.
A chill crept up my spine, and it was all I could do not to take a step back.
“I came to let you know we’ve got a big meeting,” Anders said, keeping his voice low. “I need you ready,” he added, his attitude completely different from what he’d shown around Gran.
“Is something wrong?” I asked, unsure why he was being like this.
He let out a derisive snort and rolled his eyes toward the ceiling. “Holy fucking shit. Yeah, you could say that.”
“Are you mad about this meeting? What’s it about, anyway?” I still tried to be as calm and easygoing as I could.
“It’s a diplomatic group.” He shrugged and glanced toward Gran again before leaning in close. “Did you and Leviathan fuck?”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Did you fuck him?” He stared at me, fire flashing in his eyes.
There was no way I could tell him the truth.
All I’d allowed Anders in the three weeks since I’d returned to Idlewild as his mate were kisses—I’d let him touch my breast through my shirt one time, and even that had been too much.
Though, I’d slept with Levi after only a few days.
A flash of memory flickered into my mind.
Levi, his hands grasping my hips, his face a mask of carnal bliss, slamming his hips against me.
Shoving that thought away, I realized that tidbit of information wouldn’t go over well. Instead of answering the question directly, I decided to tell the truth, but in a roundabout way.
“I went to Levi to learn to shift, Anders. That’s the whole reason I left Idlewild,” I said. It was the truth, and it would hopefully alter the trajectory of the conversation away from more… uncomfortable truths.
Anders snorted and shook his head. “Well, what was the guy like, anyway? Was he a strong alpha? Real hard-ass?”
A hard-ass? I guess he could be, but from what I’d seen, Levi led the pack with kindness and honor rather than fear and strength.
“Uh, he was kind of scary,” I said. That part was true. I thought about the way he’d fought off and killed those Red Maw men who’d chased me. Levi was scary as fuck when he was angry—possibly the scariest person I’d ever seen.
Shrugging, Ander glanced out the window. “Yeah. Whatever. Big bad Demon Wolf. Probably a pussy in a real fight.”
Why was he asking about Levi? Had Eugenia told him that Levi and I had been together? Maybe that was why he was pressing so hard for us to have sex? He wanted to, like, reclaim me or something?
“Look, Anders, Levi is old news. There’s no reason to worry about him,” I said.
“Worry?” His face twisted with disgust and he snorted a laugh. “Not a chance, babe. Anyway, be ready for the delegation. We’ll be meeting at my place.” He checked his watch. “They should be here in about three hours. See you then?”
“Sure. Yeah,” I said, thrown by the way he was acting and the weird line of questioning. “I’ll be there early, okay?”
“Good.” He pushed away from the counter and headed for the door. “See you then.” He raised a hand, plastering the smile back on his face, and called to Gran. “Bye, Mrs. Hollis. Have a good day.”
“Goodbye, Anders, dear,” Gran said, waving back.
The rest of the afternoon went by in a blur as I helped Gran with the store, then my grandfather to change lightbulbs there and upstairs in our home.
I hated watching him climb ladders at his age, and so I took over doing most of that work.
Another reason I was happy to be home. I hated to think of what might have happened had I never been able to return.
Once that was done, I headed up to get ready for the meeting at Anders’s place.
While I showered and dressed, I wondered about the diplomats Anders was hosting.
Shifters from a nearby pack? Maybe humans?
Or was he trying to make allies with other shifters farther away?
Anders had always been power hungry, and it was an open secret he wanted to increase Idlewild’s strength and influence, which meant any of those options were on the table.
As I dried my hair, I gazed out the window at the street below.
My grandparents’ shop was on the bottom level of a three-story building.
The upper levels were the living quarters.
Two bedrooms and two bathrooms on the top floor, and the kitchen and living room on the middle floor.
It was small, but it had always worked for us.
After my parents died, my grandparents had brought me here and raised me.
It was much different from the only other place I’d lived in for any length of time.
Hidden Grove. That bunkhouse in that tiny, secret village had been austere, but also somehow cozy, warm, and comforting.
Strange to think back on that now. Being back in Idlewild made my time there seem a bit dreamlike and unreal.
After changing into fresh clothes, I headed out to Anders’s place, again shifting and running.
The enjoyment, the awe, from this transformation hadn’t faded yet.
Every time I did it, I was exhilarated. Melding my human and wolf sides like this was liberating.
It made me wonder how I ever lived without it.
Being a full shifter had already become such an intrinsic part of me that I could barely remember not being able to do it.
Anders was waiting for me on the front porch. “You weren’t lying. You made it about five minutes early,” he said as I shifted.
“I like to be on time,” I said, and pulled my phone out to text Gran that I’d made it safe.
“Shit!” Anders hissed.
I flinched at his outburst and put my phone on the counter. “What? What’s wrong?”
He growled with frustration. “I forgot the fucking town map. I had one of the elders bring it from city hall. It shows all the streets, roads, and borders for Idlewild. I needed it for this meeting. Damn it.”
“I’ll go get it.” I wanted to be helpful, and I also wanted to keep him from losing his temper. “Where is it?”
“It’s at my mom’s. I stopped by to see her before coming home. I must have put it down and forgotten it.”
His mother had lived in the same house as long as I’d known him. I could get the map and be back in less than twenty minutes.
“No problem. I’ll go now.” I smiled at him, doing my best to exude the attitude of a helpful, loving mate.
Anders didn’t smile back. He only managed to grunt in agreement before turning away. “I gotta piss before the guys get here. I’ll see you when you get back.”
I suppressed a shudder at that and headed out the door.
I walked in my human form for several hundred yards, enjoying the weather.
Honestly, I didn’t want to be there right when the envoys arrived.
That seemed awkward. I didn’t have any experience with things like that, and I’d prefer to slip in and hide off to the side while they talked about whatever it was they talked about.
There was no doubt in my mind that it would be dry and boring stuff. Maybe, when it was over, Beatrice and I could have dinner. I slipped my hand into my pocket to take out my phone, then realized I didn’t have it.
“Shit,” I muttered under my breath.
I’d only been gone five minutes or so. Maybe the people hadn’t arrived yet. If I hurried, I could swing by, grab my phone, then head to get the map.
Screw it. I turned and jogged back to his house. Once there, I rushed up the stairs and hurried through the front door.
“Sorry. I forgot my phone,” I called, my eyes locked on my phone, where it sat on the counter. “I’ll be right back with the…” I trailed off as I turned to find Anders sitting on the couch, facing Levi and Rainier.
My eyes nearly bulged out of my head. Cold, watery tendrils swirled down my spine at the sight of the man I’d left, sitting across from the man I’d left him for. Rainier looked incredibly uncomfortable, but he flashed me an embarrassed smile and waved at me.
Anders was glaring at Levi, his jaw set, lips twisted petulantly. Levi, however, was looking at me, hurt and longing on his face. It was the same way he’d looked at me the last time I’d seen him.
“What…what…I don’t…” I struggled to form words, and when it became obvious that my brain had short-circuited, I chose the only other option I had. I ran, sprinting from the nightmare scene.
The last thing I saw as I left was Levi leaping to his feet, his hand outstretched. “June, wait!”