90. Juniper
JUNIPER
“I’m glad you’re back, but why didn’t you tell us you were leaving?” Gran said.
I hated how upset and nervous she looked. Grandpa sat by the fire, giving me a similar look of worried exasperation.
“I don’t know,” I said. “It was something that I was compelled to do, if that makes any sense.”
I’d returned thirty minutes ago, to a group of people who seemed to have been overcome by a sense of impending doom.
Everyone had been tense and anxious, more so than when I’d left.
The overcast sky had given the forest and village a darkness that made it seem much later than the late afternoon that it was.
Once I’d informed Linnea and Douglas that I’d returned, I’d gone to the cabin my grandparents were sharing with Beatrice.
They, like everyone else in town, had heard I’d ventured back to Idlewild, and were less than happy about it.
On the trip back, instead of being filled with relief at what I’d discovered, I’d instead been filled with anxiety.
It was a deep ache in my chest that made my wolf whine with worry.
I couldn’t think of why I would feel that way, unless it had something to do with the sight.
Something from one of my visions, or from many of them that may have gone unnoticed during the first time witnessing them.
The only person who might have any answers was Grandpa.
I needed to speak with him, so I made this my first stop.
“All right,” Grandpa said, standing from his chair, and moving to join us at the table. “You’re back now, and that’s all that matters.” He patted my hand, a gesture of comfort I hadn’t realized I needed. My shoulders relaxed at his touch.
“Grandpa?” I looked at him, hoping he could answer my question. “What do you know about the sight?”
“Oh, I know a bit,” he said. “Heard stories my whole life.” His eyebrows drew together. “Have you had more visions?”
“I have,” I said. “I went back to Idlewild to find out who killed Naphele Cross. And I did.”
My grandparents sat back, their eyes wide with shock. The old murder had become a talking point around town when Levi had returned, and some of them were old enough to have known and heard about it from people who’d lived through it all.
“Who did it, then?” Gran asked, her voice a low whisper.
“Rafe Thornton,” I said. “He’s actually still alive—well, he was alive. He died right after confessing to me.”
“I’ll be dipped in shit,” Grandpa said, taking his cap off and tossing it on the table. “That sneaky old son of a bitch. I thought he died years ago.”
“I know,” I said. “What I wanted to ask about, is…well, I assumed my visions began because Naphele’s soul needed closure.
They didn’t start until I met Levi, and I assumed she must have—I don’t know—sensed my gift and latched on to me, pushing these visions into my mind to help find her killer.
I hoped that once I did, I’d be relieved, but if anything, I’m more anxious than ever.
Like I still need to do something else. Have you ever heard of anything like this? ”
“Can’t say I have,” Grandpa said. “Most of the time visions play out like movies in your mind. You watch all the characters go by doing whatever they did. Then it’s over. I never knew anyone who had any residual effects from it. Not that was ever talked about, anyway.”
“Right,” I said, “But how do you see the other people in a vision? Maybe if I could get out of Naphele’s point of view, there might be more to the story. Perhaps Rafe had an accomplice or something. If I could follow Rafe in a vision, then maybe I could figure out what I’m missing?”
I looked at them pleadingly, the anxiety and strange nervousness in my chest growing stronger by the second. Gran and Grandpa both stared back at me in confusion. They shared a look that worried me, then Grandpa looked at me again.
“You say…in all your visions you see everything from Naphele’s point of view?”
“Uh, well, yeah,” I said, glancing back and forth between them. “That’s how it always is.”
“You see everything as if you’re looking through Naphele’s eyes?” Gran asked.
I’d never explicitly told them how the visions looked, simply what I’d seen. I was unsure why they were acting weird.
“Yes. Why is that strange?” I said.
“The sight doesn’t work like that,” Grandpa said. “My grandmother and her sister both had the gift, along with my father. It’s supposed to be you standing there, watching what happens. An outside observer.”
I frowned, recalling that first vision of Naphele being murdered. That had been the way he described, but everything after became more and more me inside of her.
“What does that mean then?” I asked.
Gran shot Grandpa another look before leaning forward and taking my hands. “Dear, have you ever thought about reincarnation?”
God, was I ever going to get away from this subject?
“I have,” I admitted, then decided to tell them the whole story. Starting from the beginning and ending with the ritual Rainier had helped me go through that proved I was not Naphele. When I was done, they actually looked more concerned than before.
“I know the ritual,” Gran said. “It’s very old. I saw it a couple of times as a girl. You say the red stone glowed when you were done?”
“Yeah,” I said, nodding sadly. “Rainier said that meant the answer was no. That I wasn’t the reincarnation of Naphele.”
“Question,” Gran said. “Was this ceremony done before or after you’d learned to shift?”
“Kind of neither,” I said. “I shifted for the very first time as I was coming out of the vision. Why? What does that matter?”
“The answer may not have been correct if the vision began without you being fully connected to your inner wolf,” she explained.
“That is part of you. An integral part. It might very well be the thing that connects you to Naphele. We could do it again and see if there’s a change.
Would you like to try? I remember how it goes. ”
The moment she said that, the anxiety and worry that had been building within me abated a fraction, making me less stressed and more at ease. Was this what needed to happen? A tremor of both unease and excitement shuddered through my chest. What if…
“We can try. Let me go to Rainier’s cabin and see if I can find the stuff he used.”
Before either of them could respond, I was out the door. An urgency pushed me onward, desperate and insistent.
Thankfully, the people who were using the cabin weren’t there, and I rushed in after my knocks went unanswered. I searched through drawers and cupboards, finally finding the pouch in Rainier’s closet. Gripping it tightly, I rushed back to my grandparents.
“I got it,” I cried as I entered the cabin.
“Let’s give it a go,” Gran said, ushering me and Grandpa to the fireplace. I handed her the small bag of mushrooms, spices, and stones, and gave the sheet of ancient paper to Grandpa.
“I’m a little rusty,” Gran said, “but I think I remember how this goes. It was once the best way to do this, but it’s fallen out of favor over the years.”
I watched, more intently this time than last, as she heated the pot and began to put together the concoction.
“Honey, can you grab a knife from the kitchen?” she asked my grandfather.
He did as asked. With a bizarre sense of déjà vu, Gran went about everything exactly as Rainier had.
She cut my palm while Grandpa recited the foreign words.
The strange smell of the brew filled the room, and that disconcerting sensation of sound being muffled settled over me.
It was working. My heart thundered, sending pulses of blood rushing through my body, and the steady shush-shush of my heartbeat was audible to my own ears.
Finally, Gran held the smoking pot toward me. “Breathe deep.”
I sucked in a huge lungful of the bitter brew, the warmth of the smoke welling in my chest. Grandpa was still chanting, but his voice had grown distant.
When I could no longer hold my breath, I let it out, and that familiar flash of lightning burst across my vision. My grandparents vanished, replaced by—
A wolf. She stood several feet in front of me, gazing at me with yellow eyes. Her dark fur was marked with streaks of light brown. I stood in my own wolf form, trembling with fear and excitement. I knew who this was. Naphele.
She bobbed her head—the wolf version of a nod—as if she could read my thoughts and took a step forward. I mirrored her motion, approaching her slowly and cautiously. When we were mere inches apart, she put her face toward mine, sniffing the air. As our noses touched, a burst of light blinded me.
The floor beneath my feet seemed to give way, and I tumbled into emptiness. Instead of being afraid, I experienced joy. Unadulterated and expounding joy. Something that was missing had been found. I hadn’t even known I was missing something, yet now, I was whole and complete.
Colorful, moving pictures erupted around me.
Memories. Levi’s face was in many of them, others as well.
A beautiful woman with raven black hair, who I instinctively knew was Naphele’s grandmother.
Rafe Thornton’s angry, mad face. More appeared, faster and faster, my mind filling with all these ancient memories.
Memories of…my past life. I had been Naphele.
That was what I’d been missing. The connection to my old life.
As I fell faster, images of Naphele fighting enemies flooded my view, and with each vision, the skills she’d had filtered into me. Her ability to fight and defend became my ability.
Instinct told me I was reaching the bottom of this well, or pit, or whatever it was.
I looked down, and instead of a pool of water or a rocky bottom, I saw another image.
Levi, on his knees, bleeding and hurt, hands tied behind his back.
A woman with short hair standing above him.
Her lips parted with a devious smile and three words echoing from her mouth.
“I am Naphele.”
A howl of untold rage burst from my lungs.
Lies. I wanted to tear her limb from limb, shred her body until nothing remained but a pile of bones.
She’d hurt my mate, she’d said she was me, and that would not stand.
Closing my limbs around my body, and pointing my head forward, I picked up speed as I fell, and opened my jaws as the image of the hateful woman came closer. When I struck her—
“June! Wake up!”
My eyes snapped open, and I found myself being held by both my grandparents, my body thrashing against them as I tried to rush for the door. For a moment, I didn’t have any clue where I was. I scanned the room for the woman who had said she was Naphele, but it was just me and my grandparents.
I sagged back against them, unclenching my fists. The two stones thudded to the carpet. The red stone, smeared with blood, lay dark and unchanged. The white stone shone with a brilliant light that shimmered like a miniature sun. The three of us stared down at it in shock, watching it slowly fade.
“White means yes,” Gran whispered.
“Naphele is within me,” I said, holding my hands up to look at them as if never seeing them before. “I was her in a past life.”
Strangely, I didn’t feel any different. Not really.
I assumed I would feel her inside me, and in a way I did.
I recalled many more memories, skills, and thoughts, but I was still completely me.
The only real difference was that I felt more complete, more whole.
My sadness and irritation at being compared to her vanished.
Rather than a rival, she’d become part of me.
I opened my mouth to say exactly that, but a panicked pounding at the door interrupted me. Grandpa went to the door and opened it, revealing a terrified, sweaty young man. He stood gasping, bent over, hands on his knees.
He looked past my grandfather to me, and the moment I looked into his eyes, I knew that what I’d seen in the vision wasn’t a fantasy, but reality.
“Levi?” I said, scrambling to my feet.
“Taken,” the man said. “Ambush. The rest of the alphas fought off the Red Maw and are gathering to launch a counterattack to get him back. Rainier sent me to tell you.”
A low growl rumbled in my chest. They were out of their mind if they thought they would try to rescue my mate without me. Love for Levi surged through my chest. I would get him back, and I would destroy that bitch and her pack.
I hugged and kissed my grandparents, then stepped outside.
“Take me to them.”