Chapter 15
CHAPTER
FIFTEEN
COOPER
Two weeks later, I’m standing on the curb outside The Den with Ellery and our rental van, but the other four are missing in action.
“That’s it, I’m sending a text.” I push my hand into the pocket of my coat and pull out my phone.
Me: Where are you all? ETA?
Bryce: I got held up getting a snowsuit at the mall. They’re trying to find the one I ordered to be delivered. Miles is with me. We’ll be there soon.
Damon: We’ll have to meet you guys there. Clover isn’t having it, and Adeline is having the whole ‘my baby wants me’ moment. We’ll get there tonight, but by the time we get back from the burbs, it’s gonna be pretty late.
Adeline: I’m going to ignore you saying that so that we can have a nice weekend.
Damon: I feel the same. I don’t like to see her cry either. It breaks me.
Miles: Bryce is delusional. We aren’t getting out of here for another half hour and then the traffic into the city. We can detour around the city and probably beat you there. You two go on your own, and we’ll see you there.
“What the hell!” I shout. “Tell me why I rented a damn minivan then?”
“Let’s just go. I don’t want to be driving in the dark. I’ve heard too many deer stories.” Ellery climbs into the passenger seat.
“So, I’m the driver?” I point at myself.
“As if the captain would have it any other way.” She slams the door.
I grunt and talk to myself the whole way around the van. “What happened to ‘I’m the captain of the ER department’?”
I start the van, then put on my seat belt and ease into the traffic. It’s going to be hell to get up to Wisconsin now that we’ve waited so long to leave. When we’re stopped in traffic two minutes into our journey, I sigh, and Ellery looks over at me.
“Can we just not?” She puts in her earbuds and turns her head away from me to look out the window.
What the hell has happened to us?
I use the opportunity to listen to my music, following the directions on the GPS. I forgot how much fun it was to sing along to music while cruising around. It’s been a while since I’ve done it. I can’t roll down the windows because it’s grown colder now, but it’s still relaxing.
“I have to pee,” she says, taking out her earbuds.
We pull off at the next exit and stop at a gas station. Each of us grabs some snacks, and when we get back in the van, I’m reminded of the trips we used to take. One of us always got licorice, and the other got chips. Somehow without us talking about it, it always happened.
She climbs in the car, and she’s got licorice and chips. So much for us sharing, I guess. I look at my licorice in the center console, and she must be thinking the same thing as me. “You can have some of my chips if you’d like.”
“No, I’m fine.” I start the van and continue on our way.
She puts in her earbuds, and again, I’m left alone with my music.
Her perfume fills the car, and I don’t even mind. She’s usually not one to wear it, at least when it comes to work. Maybe she wears it all the time now. How the hell would I know?
These past three weeks have been complete torture. I’ve picked up the phone more than once to call her but never followed through.
I glance at her as I exit the freeway. We have another twenty-minute drive off the highway to get to the cabin.
How can she be that mad at me for punching Bradley? I must be missing something. I’ve done other stupid things throughout our friendship, and she never stopped talking to me for this long. Then again, I was quick to apologize for those. In this instance, I honestly don’t think I did anything wrong.
A text comes through, and Ellery pulls it up on her phone. “Miles says they hit traffic, and Damon sent the code for us to get in the cabin. Said there should be essentials for eating.”
“Great.”
Ten minutes later, we pull up in front of a cabin.
It’s nicely tucked away in the woods. I can see the neighbor, but they aren’t super close.
I park the van in the driveway and turn off the ignition.
I examine the house for a minute and wonder where the hell four bedrooms and four baths could possibly be because it doesn’t look that big.
Ellery exits the van and shuts the door before opening up the back and taking out her luggage.
She wheels it up to the door and uses the code to get in.
It’s decorated much like I’d expect from a Wisconsin cabin.
A big deer head on the wall, a stone fireplace, and wood floors. Other than that, it’s like a log cabin.
“Are we sure this is it? I don’t see how there could be four bedrooms,” she says.
I follow her into the kitchen and find a note on the counter. She picks it up and opens it while I look in the fridge to see that it’s stocked and even has a bottle of champagne.
“I think this was for someone else.” I show her the bottle of champagne, and she frowns and glances back down at the note.
“‘Ellery and Cooper,’” she says with a pissed-off expression.
The fact that the letter is just to us cements my assumption that this is a one-bedroom cabin with probably one bed.
“‘We love you both and apologize for tricking you, but to be blunt, you two need to get your shit together. As your oldest friend, I’m telling you, the two of you mean a helluva lot more to each other than just a best friend. I get that you’re scared.
I was scared. Miles was scared. Both Damon and Adeline were scared.
Everyone who risks their heart is scared.
And I get it, I understand that you guys don’t want to risk your friendship.
But where is your friendship now? You guys are lying to yourselves and it’s hurting you.
Don’t even get me started on this ridiculous fight you guys are in.
So, you have all weekend to figure it out.
I know what I’m hoping for, but I’ll take you two making up at the very least… ’”
We hear the sound of a car engine, and I look out the window to see the minivan pulling away.
Ellery groans but keeps reading. “‘You’re by yourselves with two nights to find your way back to one another. Use the time wisely. And please be honest with yourselves. We love you. Bryce and the gang.’” She drops the letter on the counter.
“Isn’t this great?” She picks up her phone and presumably dials Bryce. “Her voicemail.”
She hangs up and sits down in the chair.
I peruse the rest of the cabin, and sure enough, there’s one bed, one bath.
“Well, I’m going to make dinner,” I say.
“I’m not hungry.”
I slam the fridge. “Since when are you not hungry?”
She shrugs. “Since now.”
I stomp over to her, annoyed and pissed off. “We’re gonna talk.”
“I don’t have anything to say.”
“What are you, five, and having a temper tantrum? Get over here. We’re finishing this now.”
“Five? You acted like you were five. Someone else was playing with your toy so you punched him in the face.” Her voice escalates.
Though I hate how mad she is, I’m just happy to get a reaction out of her.
“Toy? That’s what you think you are to me?”
“That’s how I felt when I found out about the fight.
You’re not a normal guy, Cooper. You’re Cooper Rice, quarterback for the Chicago Grizzlies.
It’s embarrassing and makes me think people assume I’m playing two guys.
I can’t wait until the slut comments start hitting social media.
” She runs her hand down her face. “You went after him with the excuse that it was for me, but in reality, it was for you because of your red rage.”
I open my mouth, but she continues. “I get it, okay? I hear people all the time talk shit about your performance, and as soon as I tell them you’re my friend, they shut up, but instead of attacking them, I tell them about the kind-hearted person you are.
I stick up for you. But what you did at that bar…
” She shakes her head as though she’s disappointed in me.
“You’re right.” I go to start the pilot light on the gas fireplace, feeling way too vulnerable to let her see inside me right now. “I saw red. I wanted to beat the shit out of him. I’m happy Damon and Miles got me off of him when they did.”
She sits quietly on the plaid couch, bringing her legs under her. “Do you see how weak it made me feel? I had two adult men fighting, and not over me. I’ve caught hell at work, but it’s died down.”
I light the gas for the fireplace and sit back to make sure it’s good before heading over to the couch with her since the chair looks too small to be comfortable for me. I’m starting to think this cabin is designed for people who need to make up after a fight. “I’m sorry.”
“Would you have done that if it was Bryce or Adeline?”
“You can’t even compare, and you know it.”
She picks at the blanket, her gaze seeming unwilling to meet mine. “Why? Why am I different?”
I lean forward and rest my forearms on my thighs. My head hangs, and I stare at the hardwood floor. “You don’t want me to tell you.”
My chest constricts because if I do this, if I say the words out loud, there’s no going back. I could be taking our friendship and sending it careening off a cliff.
“Tell me.”
My chest squeezes even more, and there’s this painful ache where my heart is. I glance at her from the corner of my eye. “You have to be sure.”
“I think Bradley stirred some things up between us. Things maybe we’ve both been feeling but haven’t been saying.”
“Elle.” I sigh. “We promised one another.” My voice is a pained whisper.
She nods. “I know we did, but words and promises don’t change what our hearts feel.”
“It will change everything between us.” I shake my head.
“We’re at a crossroads here, Coop. We can’t keep pretending we’re those naive college kids anymore.” She pulls the blanket tighter around her.
I toe out of my shoes and turn on the couch to face her. My outstretched arm almost reaches her. I want it to. I want to touch her and kiss her and love her until she won’t let me anymore. God, just talking to her again feels so good already.
“I was pissed at Bradley because he had you. He had you, and he disrespected you by dancing with that woman. And he was going to sleep with her, mark my words.”
She nods. “Probably. But it wasn’t your job to put him in line. I’m afraid you see me as a stand-in for your mom.”
My eyes cut to her. What is she talking about? “My mom?”
“That’s why you went after him. It reminded you of your mom and dad. How your mom was so afraid of your dad cheating on her that she’d show up at road games and surprise him. There you were on the road and saw the guy I’m dating dancing with another woman.”
“Fuck.” I run my hand through my hair. I never even thought of it that way before. Never put those things together.
“I’m not your mom,” she whispers.
“I know that.”
“Do you?” Wetness fills her eyes.
I pause before I respond. “I had my suspicions about how the league worked from stories my dad told me. The women everywhere throwing themselves at you. I never wanted someone I cared about to have to deal with that or feel insecure about it.” I stop, the realization gutting me.
“I think I tried to be content with us staying in the best friend zone to prevent you from ever feeling that pain I saw my mom live through all those years, but…”
“Someone else did it anyway. You tried to save me from it, but someone else did it. Or so you thought.”
“Shit, Elle.” I scoot closer to her. “You’re right. That’s why I’m so mad about it. All this time, I’ve kept my feelings hidden to keep you safe.”
“You were forgetting one thing, Cooper.”
“What?”
She places her hand on my stubbled cheek. “I’d only ever hurt like that if you did it to me. I never cared about Bradley, not in that way. And even if I had, it would never measure up to how much I care about you.”
“Are you saying what I think you are?”
She gives me a coy smile. “That depends. Do you have something to tell me?”
I freeze, stuck in my fear again. I’ve already pretty much told her without saying the words, but as soon as the words come out of my mouth, they’re there, lying between us, never to be taken back.
Can I break the promise I made to her eight years ago? I’m not sure.