Chapter 24
CHAPTER
TWENTY-FOUR
COOPER
As I’m finishing my workout, my phone dings in my pocket on the way to my car. It’s Ellery. I glance at the time on my phone, she still has hours left in her shift, and that’s if she gets off on time.
“Hey, you miss me?”
I hear the stutter of her breath.
“Elle?” I ask, my adrenaline already pumping in my veins. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s just…” She can barely talk, she’s crying so hard. “I just needed to hear your voice.”
“What happened?” The last time she called me in hysterics like this, she’d felt responsible for losing a patient who died.
“Mr.… Euing.”
The homeless guy that she’s grown a relationship with since she was a resident at Mercy. One time she made me drive around looking for him because he hadn’t made an excuse to come in for over a month.
“What happened?”
“He’s dead. There was…” She heaves for a breath. “Nothing we could do to save him.”
“Oh, Elle. I’m sorry. I can head right over there.”
“No!” She cries for a few seconds. “I have to finish my shift. Dr. Murphy just told me to take my break.”
“I’ll be there to pick you up when you’re done.
“Thanks.” She clears her throat and blows her nose. “Okay, I can do this. I’ll see you later today.”
“Okay.”
She’s gotten herself able to go back out there to finish her shift, and I’m not gonna keep harping on whether she’s okay. I’ll pick her up and take care of her when she’s done working. Hopefully, she’ll feel a little better by morning.
I bide my time and stop at the grocery store, heading back to my apartment, where I prepare the chocolate chip cookies that I make for her anytime she’s feeling down. It started with the very first patient she lost.
I finish just in time to head over to the hospital. There’s no way I can be late for her today, so I hope traffic is cooperative.
I decide not to go inside since she said Dr. Murphy’s been giving her shit lately. Bringing her lunch is one thing, but picking her up, I can wait outside.
I park my car and wait, not caring that it’s a drop-off zone. I’ll move if I need to.
She walks out on time, and I get out of the car when I see her coming. When her gaze finds mine, tears fill her eyes, and she walks right into my arms.
I hold her close and kiss the top of her head. “I know. I know how much he meant to you.” My hands run up and down her back as sobs rack her body.
Elle appears tough on the outside, like nothing affects her, but it’s all a front. She cares for all her patients, but I know Mr. Euing was special to her.
“Come on,” I say, opening the passenger door and getting her in the car.
I round the front, ignoring the honks, and climb into the driver’s seat, reaching back and handing her the Tupperware container filled with cookies.
She releases a long breath and smiles over at me. “Thanks.”
“Not sure they’ll do the trick today, but I wanted to try.”
Opening the lid, she holds the container out to me. “No thanks, I had enough of the raw dough.”
A small laugh falls out of her because when she’s around when I make them, both our fingers are always in the dough. So much so that we only get about half of the cookies baked.
She picks out one with the most chocolate chips and covers up the container, eating it as I drive.
“Is it okay if we go to my place?” I ask, thinking maybe she wants to be in her bed.
“Yeah, but no company,” she says.
I reach over and squeeze her knee. “No problem.”
I take the long way, hopping on Lake Shore Drive, and turning on the Scorpions “Wind of Change.” She closes her eyes and rests her head on the headrest. I don’t open the window because it’s chilly, but I do drive, and it takes us an extra half hour to get back to my place.
When I pull into the parking garage across from The Den, she shuffles out, and we walk across the street. She’s holding up well, but it’s that facade that scares me.
She beelines to the couch once we’re in my apartment, opening up the container and taking another cookie.
“You want a shower, or do you just want to veg?”
“No, I need a shower.” She sighs.
I turn on the water and shut the bathroom door, so it steams up nice for her.
She’s yet to tell me the specifics of what happened to Mr. Euing, and I learned the first time experiencing this with her to wait until she’s ready.
Not to rush her through the process because I have no idea what she’s going through.
“It’s probably ready,” I say a few minutes later.
She walks toward the bathroom and goes in, shutting the door behind her. It’s then I hear her start to cry again. There’s no way I’m letting her face this all on her own, so I strip out of my clothes in my bedroom and open the bathroom door.
“It’s just me,” I tell her, opening the glass shower door and stepping in behind her.
She’s yet to dip her head back to get wet, and when she turns to me, her mascara is streaking down her cheeks more. I run my thumb under her eyes to dry the tears, even though I know more will come.
“Come on, let me,” I say, easing her head under the stream of water. When her hair is wet, I take some shampoo in my palms, lathering it up and rubbing it into her blonde hair. My fingers massage her scalp, working the shampoo in. She leans on me, her head tipping forward.
“I should have called the police that day,” she says quietly.
“What could they have done?” I ask, tilting her back to rinse the shampoo out of her hair. Once the water runs clear, I take the conditioner, working it through her beautiful locks.
“I don’t know, watched the area more, checked the shelters.”
“Where did it happen?”
While the conditioner works in her hair, I grab the washcloth and soap, running it over her body to wash her. “The paramedics picked him up right where he always stayed by Nordstrom. You know how he was always fighting for that area.” She shakes her head. “I should have done more.”
“There’s nothing you could’ve done. He didn’t want your help.” Again, I nudge her head back to rinse the conditioner out and the rest of her body off.
I turn off the water and wrap my arms around her, but she begins to shiver. I grab a towel, holding it out for her. She walks into my waiting arms, and I wrap the warmth around her. She turns and steps into me, and I hold her. Hell, I’ll hold her for a lifetime if she’ll let me.
We go into the bedroom, and I dress her in one of my sweatshirts that hangs down to her knees and a pair of my pajama pants she has to roll five times at the waist. Turning back my sheets and comforter, she slips into bed, and I join her after dressing in my sweats and turning on the television.
Although she might not laugh, she always asks for a comedy with Vince Vaughn in it during times like this because she doesn’t want to wallow.
I turn on The Break-Up, and she cuddles into my chest. I wrap my arms around her, wishing I could take the pain away for her.
A half hour later, I feel her body go limp, and I wiggle over to see that she’s asleep. Not wanting to leave her, I stay there until my door buzzer rings. I slide out of bed, turning down the volume so it doesn’t wake her up.
Damon stands on the other side of the door.
“What’s wrong?” He doesn’t look like he has good news.
“Hey man, can I come in?”
I glance inside my apartment. Damon is notorious for being loud. “Mind if we talk out here. Elle is sleeping, and today was a hard day. She lost a patient.”
He frowns. “Oh shit, I’m sorry. Yeah, of course. I mean, I’d tell you later, but time is of the essence with this.”
“Okay. Let me just grab my coat or something.” I rush inside, grabbing my coat and coming right back. “What’s up?”
“Remember how I announced that we were looking at houses?” He shuffles his feet. “Well, we got the one we wanted, and we had to do a fast closing to get it. I’ll totally pay you for the rest of my lease, but for Clover’s sake, we’re moving sooner rather than later.”
Man, it feels like the end of an era. Damon’s lived here almost as long as I have.
“It won’t be the same without you.”
He nods a few times, appearing somber about the whole change himself.
“Crazy, I thought I might live here forever since I never planned any of this.” He looks in the direction of his apartment.
“But we’ve discussed wanting to have another kid.
We’re not sure Clover is the type of kid who can wait to have to share our attention with a sibling. I love her so much, but she’s defiant.”
“You’ve spoiled her,” I say, not that I can’t see myself doing the same thing. My eyes stray to the inside of the apartment to where my future lies tucked in bed.
“Yeah, lesson learned.” He chuckles because we both know he probably won’t change.
“And no worries about the rent, you aren’t paying if you aren’t living here. I’m sure I can find someone. I’m happy for you and your family.”
He shoves his hands in his pockets. “It’ll be weird not living with you and another teammate. I mean, we have our own places, but fuck, it’s time to grow up I guess, huh?”
I laugh. “You act like we’re not going to see one another. We play for the same team, and our wi… well, your wife and my girlfriend, along with Miles’s wife, are all friends. They’ll be making plans for all of us.”
He chuckles. “Yeah, they will.”
“You won’t miss me that much.” I squeeze his shoulder.
“I will miss your cheap rent. If I told you how much we’re paying for this mortgage.” He shakes his head.
“You really want me to feel sorry for you? You have plenty of money.”
He runs his hand over his head and pulls at his neck. “Yeah, we’re fortunate, but still, I don’t know how people do it who don’t make what we do.” He shakes his head. “Since when did we start grumbling about mortgage payments and how expensive stuff is? What the hell is happening to me?”
“You started it.”
“We’re getting old. You better catch up.”
I don’t say anything because Elle doesn’t work like that, and although I’d have us married tomorrow, I’m trying like hell to take this slow for her.
“Go and be with her. I’ll let you know a specific date, but we’ll be out soon.”
“Great. Thanks.”
We shake hands, and he heads back to his place. This day just got shittier, although I understand why Damon and Adeline need to find a place in the city big enough for Clover and however many other kids they end up having. Something tells me it might be a lot.
I shut the door of my apartment and find Ellery still asleep on my bed, looking peaceful.
Stopping in the doorway, I take my time to soak in her beauty.
I don’t deserve her, but damn if I’m ever going to give her up.
I just have to convince myself that it’s okay not to rush her to accept my ring and my last name.
I thought that if we ever got together, things would be perfect.
I never thought I’d struggle as much as I have these weeks that we’ve been together.
But it’s only because I love her so much.