16. Chapter 16 This is My Life Now #2
Then, after I'm given fifteen minutes to freshen up, the Lady Aliyah hosts a tea for me and the other women of their house, which includes cousins, both near and distant and Queen Camille's goddaughter, Ghislaine Vanderlin and her two teenaged daughters, who the queen treats like family.
I breathe a sigh of relief when Reem shows me into my suite in the palace. It's a different one than I stayed in the first time I was here.
"This suite is in the family wing," Reem tells me as the door closes behind us with my bodyguard detail on the other side.
Both are women.
I wonder if there's a secret passage that connects somehow to Gabriel's room. If only.
"I have never been in this section of Qasr al-Nur," Reem adds with clear awed appreciation for her surroundings. "Thank you for requesting I continue in the role as your murafidha."
"Companion doesn't seem like an adequate title for all that you do." She's more like a personal assistant, protocol consultant, social secretary and friend all rolled into one socially adept bundle.
"You have expanded the role to the delight of my grandmother. She and my family are very proud of me."
My smile is strained but genuine when I say, "They should be. You're kind of amazing."
Reem carefully inspects the dark teal dress I'm supposed to change into for dinner and the reception that follows.
It's one of several formal designer gowns included in the trousseau Queen Camille had delivered to my apartment in Santa Fe along with her personal seamstress to alter everything to fit me to perfection.
After Gabriel told me his mother wanted to make sure I had a wardrobe to cover all the formal events that would occur as part of my welcome to Zahriya and the weeklong wedding celebration, I'd been really nervous about what that meant.
Both in terms of what kind of clothing the queen thought I should wear and the fact that there would be so much socializing leading up to and including the wedding rituals.
But every single item of clothing Queen Camille sent in her trousseau gift (and there was a lot more than formal wear) fit both my body and personality to a T. At least according to Tessa and DeeDee.
Gabriel, who insisted on a fashion show over video call, agreed wholeheartedly. His vocal praise of my beauty and very clear frustrated passion from the sight of me in the dresses especially fed my determination to continue wearing clothes that fit rather than hide my body.
In a subtle mermaid style, the gown for tonight shimmers with intricate beading in the same color of dark teal as the silk. Sleeveless with an asymmetrical neckline that shows zero cleavage, it still manages to show my curvy figure off in a way that makes me feel confident not uncomfortable.
A swath of gathered chiffon in the exact same shade of dark teal hangs elegantly from waist to hem on one side of the long skirt, drawing attention away from the roundness of my tummy without hiding the curve of my hip.
The final embellishment of four strands of beads draping over each shoulder creates the illusion of cap sleeves.
It's beautiful and I feel pretty wearing it once the stylist assigned to me has done my hair into a sleek French knot with artful tendrils framing my face and applied makeup that looks natural and not overdone, but somehow brings out the bright sea blue of my eyes.
After I explained my sensitivity to liquid foundations, she applied a light dusting of a mineral powder foundation that feels like air on my skin.
Gabriel meets me at the bottom of the stairs so we can arrive at the dinner together. I want to just stop and breathe, to let him hold me close like he did in the courtyard of his palace.
But we're not there.
We're here and Gabriel's not alone. He has a royal entourage. Like the one that follows his father, the king, around. Apparently, these people were always there before, but they had instructions not to create distance between me and my sheikh.
There's the Director of Protocol, or as I like to think of him, the gatekeeper.
Because he manages who is allowed close enough to speak to the royal personage in his care and whether or not that person is allowed to do so.
Gabriel's haris is there too of course, Bala'al, Hakim and two other men, staying closer than they do at Dar al-Hayat.
Reem told me that during the day, Gabriel also has an advisor and personal secretary in his entourage.
Two more or less people doesn't make an appreciable difference to how I have to behave. I can't seek physical comfort from my fiancé without causing a scandal.
Gabriel's eyes rove over me from my head to my dainty satin slippers with a modest heel, his expression showing pure masculine approval before his eyes narrow, fixing on my face.
He steps closer so he can ask in a low tone, "Are you all right?"
I shrug. "I have to be, don't I?"
It's only for the next three weeks.
Then we get to return to Ayn al-Hayat and a much quieter life than the one the royal family lives in the capital.
Gabriel takes both of my hands in his and meets my gaze, his own warm and accepting.
"After today, the social events are less onerous until the week of the wedding.
At least two hours of time on your own is set aside in your schedule each day and Reem is to make sure you are returned to your suite by nine each night. "
"That's not the comfort you think it is." Because if alone time has to be scheduled, that means the rest of the day's hours are booked.
And going to bed early doesn't hold near the appeal it would if I knew I would have Gabriel's company when I did.
"If we had waited the year your mother wanted before marrying, many of the engagements scheduled over the next two weeks would have happened further apart." The words acknowledge the results of our quick wedding without showing any real regret.
Knowing how difficult the coming weeks will be for me, I don't regret it either though.
I lean forward and whisper. "I just wish there was another secret passage we could use to see each other. I've missed being with you."
And I have news I want to tell him without anyone else around that I won't risk saying over the phone or on a video call. Even great cyber security can be hacked.
"Who says there isn't?" Gabriel gives me a slashing grin.
Butterflies of anticipation and relief flutter inside me.
"Really?" I ask, the hope I feel no doubt burning brightly in my gaze.
"Really." Gabriel squeezes my hands and then lets them go before offering his arm. "Shall we?"
"Yes."
At least fifty guests await our arrival for the family dinner. The formal welcome reception that follows has at least three times that many.
By the time I am back in my suite, it is nearly midnight and I am beyond exhausted.
After undressing and leaving my gorgeous dress draped over a chair and my underclothes in a pile on the floor like I never do, I pad barefoot into the bathroom and force myself to remove my makeup as carefully as my mother taught me to do.
Even years later, memories of the days when forgetting caused rashes of irritation and lectures from my mother because I had to leave the coverup off for a few days following the slipup are still too fresh to ignore.
I'm taking the bobby pins from my hair when Gabriel comes into the en suite.
Fully naked.