Chapter 21
Kendyll
(Two Years Ago)
“WHAT’S HE DOING HERE?” I asked Xander while staring at the golden-haired demon who appeared human at the moment.
Xander laughed nervously while scratching his cheek. “Protection?”
“Protection?” I questioned, shooting Xander a sideways look. “From what?”
“It’s better if you don’t know,” Perseus answered with a wide grin. He scanned the busy sidewalk the three of us stood on. “Where are we headed to?”
“We’re shopping, right?”
I turned at the sound of a new voice and found the rest of the members of Sinners Do It Better closing in on us.
The three newcomers—Zagan, Dante, and Coldin—stood around us and pointed in different directions to different stores.
They all wore normal street clothes with masks pulled up over their mouths, most likely to conceal their identity as much as possible.
They were becoming increasingly popular after all, and while their target audience wasn’t plentiful at the family centered amusement park, their fans could be anywhere here on the streets of New York City.
“What are they doing here?” I asked under my breath.
“Your boy apparently needs a lot of protection,” Perseus revealed with a whisper in my ear.
I whipped around, glaring at the demon for getting so close to me but also unable to stop myself from asking again, “Protection from what?”
Before he could answer, Xander grabbed my hand and pulled me against his side.
He held the brown nameless bag in his other hand, and with the appearance of our new companions, I found myself glad that the bag didn’t suggest what store we’d just left.
I’d die of mortification if all of these guys knew what Xander and I had picked out and bought together.
“This is Kendyll,” Xander introduced me to the guys. He smiled at me. “You’re a fan, so I guess I don’t have to tell you their names, do I?”
“You’re a Sinner?” Zagan asked with a raise of his pierced brow.
“Yes,” I confirmed, happily accepting the name of their fanbase. “Your band is my favorite.”
“Hmm. You have good taste.” Zagan’s teasing blue eyes flicked to Xander. “Well, not good taste in everything apparently.”
“You’re a class act comedian,” Xander responded with a sarcastic smile. “Now that everyone’s here, let’s go shopping.”
I wasn’t sure how today’s plan had gone from a party of two to a party of six.
Walking around the city with a famous rock band flanking me on all sides was pretty nerve-wracking.
Being a genuine fan of their music added another layer of nerves, because I was fan-girling just a little from being so close to all five members.
But oddly enough, the easy and familiar energy between all of the guys rubbed off on me.
The longer we spent going into name brand department stores to shop as a group, the more comfortable I grew.
Normally, I’d never be able to relax in a setting of so many people.
I wondered if it was easier breathing around these guys because they were demons.
I mean, I’d always preferred the dark and inhuman to people.
I never knew shopping could be so fun, either.
It took time for me to accept letting Xander buy things for me, and I still wasn’t sure how to allow myself to want anything.
But with Zagan acting as my personal stylist, Perseus as my sounding board for things I should get for my shoebox apartment, and Dante and Coldin as the bag carriers, I began to feel less on edge and more excited.
Xander watched it all with a light smile constantly on his face. Every time I caught sight of the tender gaze with which he regarded me, something in my chest would fly around like a cluster of dandelion petals scattering on a warm breeze.
By the time the sky above the city was dark, we’d hit every store the guys wanted for both themselves and for me.
There wasn’t an inch of arm space on Dante’s, Coldin’s, or even Xander’s arms from all the bags they carried.
We all returned to Xander’s penthouse where the bags were immediately deposited in Xander’s room by a slightly grumpy Dante and an indifferent Coldin.
“Thank you guys,” I told the band members. “I’m sorry you all got dragged into today’s shopping spree. Did the protection against whatever you guys were there for work?”
Xander coughed lightly from where he dug through the fridge in the kitchen while the remaining four members of the band shared glances.
Perseus pursed his lips as he met my eyes. “Probably not. Good luck.”
All four guys vanished in a swarm of shadows. I raised my brow but dismissed the confusion to join Xander in the kitchen. I perched on the barstool and propped my chin in my hands while watching him down some water.
“Thank you for today,” I said softly. “For all my stuff. For letting me hang out with you and your friends. It was … a lot more fun than I expected it to be.”
He sat his water down and watched me from across the island. It almost felt like he’d put the marble piece between us as a sort of barrier. More protection. From what? I was starting to wonder.
“The day’s not over,” Xander finally answered, his carefree grin returning to his face. He braced his hands on the island’s edge and cocked his head. “Do you trust me?”
The question rattled me, but not with fear. It was the same one he’d asked before he taught me that it was okay to explore myself, and my answer now was as firm and sure as it had been back then. But again, I didn’t give voice to my gut answer. Instead, I simply nodded.
“Go change into something comfy,” he ordered me.
I complied, going into his bedroom to change into a sweatshirt and leggings. When I returned to the kitchen, he’d manifested himself new clothes as well, now standing shirtless and in sweatpants. I noticed that seemed to be his go-to lounge attire.
When our eyes met, he asked, “How about we do that tattoo you want now?”
“Now?” I repeated with a flutter of excitement. “I thought you weren’t going to do it until I admitted you were my favorite member of Sinners Do It Better.”
“I’ve decided to make an exception,” he explained with a sigh and a self-important look at the ceiling. “I know, I know. My generosity knows no bounds.” Dropping the teasing expression, he smiled seriously at me. “So?”
I had always wanted more tattoos, and the idea of adding to the art on my body now made my heart race. I nodded.
He snapped his fingers, and the air behind me shifted.
I turned and found the equipment I recognized from my previous tattoos now taking up space near the line of windows in the living room.
A long bed stretched in the moonlight with a stool nearby and a table with all the items he’d need to ink me.
“What do you want and where?” Xander asked. He crossed the room and took the rolling seat by the bed. He looked over his manifested supplies while reaching behind himself to turn on the standing lamp in the corner.
Pulling myself out of my stupor, I grabbed my phone to search for an image. I didn’t even need to think about what design I wanted next. I’d fantasized about the previously impossible tattoos hundreds of times.
“This,” I answered, handing him the phone.
He studied the moth design like he was memorizing each and every detail. I didn’t doubt that was exactly what he was doing, and while I’d never trust someone to simply memorize and replicate a permanent design on my skin, this was Xander, the exception to all of my rules.
“Got it,” he announced with a nod. Setting the phone aside, he met my eyes. “Where do you want it?”
The question made my heart rate pick up. I also didn’t need to think about that answer, having planned out each design in my head. There was only a split second where I hesitated.
Do you trust me? His earlier question reverberated in my head with my equally loud internal response. More than anything.
I’d been afraid before—of my past, of my wants, of allowing him in any more than I already had. But tonight, I didn’t want to be afraid. I didn’t want to let my demons ruin what could be with my monster.
Wordlessly, I closed the lingering distance between where I stood and his stool.
I grabbed my sweatshirt and slowly pulled it off.
I was naked under it, so the minute I dropped the top to the ground, Xander’s dark human eyes landed on my bare breasts.
His jaw clenched, and gold flashed amid his onyx eyes, nearly overtaking the blackness.
“I want it here,” I answered, touching the center of my chest before tracing my fingers over the tops of my breasts and between them. “I want it to fill this space.”
I’d never chosen to be naked like this in front of anyone.
I didn’t even like being naked when alone with myself.
I almost regretted the decision to expose my bare chest to Xander, but before the alarm could rise up, his own appreciation for what he saw barreled into me.
His eyes went hazy, and his lips parted ever so slightly.
I could’ve sworn his breath even quickened as he drank me in like a dying man meeting their god.
He finally licked his lips and bobbed his head slowly. “Okay. I can do that.” His eyes met mine. “Lay down and put your head here for me.”
I positioned myself the way he’d asked, flat on my back with my head toward him.
His face hovered above mine, holding my gaze with rapt attention as he readied his tools.
He placed his hand near my breasts, right above my racing heart, and got to work.
I barely felt the needles as he gave life to the image I wanted, too lost in the feel of his firm fingers on my skin, his strong neck stretched out above my face, his spicy and woodsy scent filling my airway.
A warmth still new to me, one born of flaming longing, rippled through my body. It started where the buzzing tool decorated the space between my two bare breasts before sliding through my limbs to land where my thighs pressed together.
I swallowed hard and closed my eyes behind my glasses.
“Are you okay?” he asked roughly.