Chapter 15 #3
Melissa put on a movie in the background while we worked.
She liked to watch the same five or six movies over and over, mostly film versions of Jane Austen novels.
Sam and I didn’t mind if she wanted to put on something we’d seen, too—that way we didn’t have to worry about missing something in the movie while we worked on the puzzle.
I wasn’t paying enough attention to it to even figure out which one it was for a good half hour. It was Sense and Sensibility. Not my favorite, but none of the ones Melissa had were bad.
I put another puzzle piece in place.
“Damn, I was trying to find what went there,” Sam said, smiling.
I smiled back. “Found it,” I said. This was our usual pattern.
“I need blue,” Melissa put in, leaning over. “Make me a blue pile.” She stood up. “I’m going to make us dessert.”
She brought us all bowls with brownie sundaes, and we did our best not to drip ice cream or chocolate sauce on the puzzle pieces.
“So,” Sam said, pressing another piece into place. “Been up to anything other than working this case?”
I shrugged. “No, not really.”
“What about you, Melissa?” Sam asked her. “Anything new?”
The pink in her cheeks told us there was. “Well… kinda.”
“You can’t leave it there!” Sam protested. “Details, woman!”
Melissa laughed, although her cheeks stayed bright. “It’s only been a couple dates,” she protested.
“So who is it?” Sam asked, his eyes glittering.
“You don’t know him,” she retorted.
“He’s got a name, though, yeah?”
She rolled dark hazel eyes. “Yes, he has a name. It’s Max.”
“And what does he do?”
“God, Sam,” she mumbled.
“He’s God?” Sam teased.
“Sam.”
“What?” His milky light brown eyes sparkled.
“If you must know,” she said. “He also works for the city.” Melissa, not shockingly, was about to start a masters in hydraulic engineering next year at VCU.
It was a good career for a water witch living in a city with rapids.
She already worked for the city, although I wasn’t super clear on what she did.
Something having to do with water treatment and management.
“Is he a water witch, too?” Sam asked.
“No, he’s in the parks department.”
“Where does he work?” I asked. I liked parks. I didn’t get to go to them all that often, but I loved the outdoors.
“He does forestry. So all over. Byrd and Forest Hill and wherever they send him.”
“That’s cool!” Sam put in. “Hey, we should do a picnic at one of them! You can invite Max.”
Melissa flushed again. “It’s literally been two dates. Let me get farther than that before inflicting you two on him!”
Sam grinned, the expression made lopsided by the laxity on one side of his face. It was kind of endearing. “I’ll bring sausages…” he wheedled.
Melissa narrowed her eyes at him. “I’ll tell you what,” she said. “You both bring a date and I’ll let you meet Max.”
I wondered very briefly if Raj would ever consider doing something like that before reality reminded me that he absolutely would not, especially now.
Something must have shown on my face because both Melissa and Sam were staring at me.
“Rayn…” Melissa said, her voice tight with excitement. She grabbed on to my wrist with both hands. “Talk.”
I shook my head, knowing my face must have been bright red from the heat I could feel in my cheeks.
“Rayn, come on!” she begged. “I told you about Max! It’s your turn!”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” I mumbled, pulling my arm away from her.
“Have you been on any dates?” Sam wanted to know.
“No!” I hadn’t. A casual dinner after work with no discussion of relationship status whatsoever did not count as a date. And neither did dreams that I’d invaded, which was the only context in which anything even remotely romantic had happened.
“But you like someone?” Sam asked, a sly smile on his lips.
I felt a muscle tick in my jaw. “It’s nothing,” I repeated, more forcefully.
Melissa touched Sam’s arm. “Did something happen?” she asked me.
“No, nothing. That’s the problem,” I snapped, then winced. “Sorry,” I mumbled. “I really don’t want to talk about it.”
And now I felt even worse.
I’d come here to put my guilt out of my head for a while, and the fact that Sam and Melissa were forcing me to think about it made me irritable.
It was my own fault, and I knew that. If I hadn’t done what I’d done, there would be nothing for me to feel guilty about in the first place.
And maybe Raj would still have been speaking to me.
I knew Melissa and Sam just wanted me to be happy—wanted me to feel like I was included, wanted me to feel like I should share my life with them.
But I wasn’t like them.
I was a monster. Or, at least, I was a horrible person. I did things that other people found unforgivable.
I wondered, not for the first time, if being awful was genetic. If the fact that my uncle and even my parents had somehow destined me to keep doing things like invading Raj’s dreams or getting snappish with my friends when they just wanted the best for me.
“Sorry,” I mumbled again. “I guess I’m just not very good company tonight.”
“Bah,” was Sam’s immediate response.
Melissa hugged me. “Sorry we were pushy,” she said, then kissed the side of my face. “Now. Let’s finish this puzzle.”