Chapter 8
Chapter Eight
B y the time we returned to Pendragon, night had fallen.
As we pulled up the driveway, the front door opened and Landon and Max came out to meet us.
Max’s voice rang out as Kingston shut off the bike’s engine. “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.”
Taking Kingston’s hand, I climbed off the bike and cocked my head toward Max. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” he huffed. “Just didn’t know he had a motorcycle.”
I walked up the steps and wrapped my arms around him. “Aw, Max, did you want a motorcycle, too?”
Max grumbled. “I’m just saying, aesthetically speaking, if anyone should have a bike, it’s me.”
Landon stifled a laugh beside us, and when Max released me, I leaned over and gave my White Knight a hug, too.
“You’re alright?”
Emotion lodged in my throat at Landon’s whispered question because I wasn’t sure how to answer. Kingston’s quiet battle with his secrets broke my heart. My fear for all of them grew stronger with each new discovery at Camelot Court.
But I nodded from where Landon had tucked me under his chin, needing to hold onto a tiny bit of light in the darkness.
I looked back at Kingston. “Kingston, if Max promises to be on his very best behavior, can he have a bike, too?”
Kingston returned my teasing grin with a genuine smile, but he caught the lingering heaviness in my gaze. His features softened as he nodded. “Perhaps one with training wheels first. Just to start him off slow.”
“Ooh. Good call.”
“Gee, thanks, Dad,” Max grumbled under his breath. “Maybe I’ll just steal yours.”
“Hm.” Kingston tilted his head like he was actually considering that. “It’s a bit on the nose, don’t you think?”
When I chuckled, Max rolled his eyes. “Har, har. You two are a fucking riot.”
Smiling, Kingston nodded to me. “I’ll just go put the bike away and come meet you.”
“Okay.” I smiled back, watching him go with an ache in my chest but grateful for a minute with my two Knights.
Max assessed me, his dark eyes hunting for a hair out of place. “Sounds like you enjoyed yourself today?”
“It was…heavy, actually.” I flicked my gaze to Landon before I glanced over my shoulder. “I need some time tonight. With him, to process everything before I talk about it. Is that…”
They shared a look.
Max eyed Kingston as he pulled off to the side of the house, before arching a brow. “Yeah, of course. You good, though?”
“I’m good. I promise.”
He nodded. “Then do what you need to do, Princess. I’m not going anywhere.” Dropping a kiss onto the top of my head, he shrugged. “Except to bed now that you’re home. You know where to find me.”
“Bathtub,” I teased him, nodding seriously. “Got it.”
He winked, sending a shiver down my spine that under other circumstances would’ve had me jumping and latching onto his back like a koala to go with him.
Once he’d gone inside, I looked up at Landon as we stood on the porch, waiting for Kingston to return. As he stared out in the direction Kingston had gone, Landon’s frown and furrowed brow caused a pang in my chest.
“Is he…” He swallowed. “How is he?”
“Sad, but he understands.” When his features tightened, I cupped his cheek. “He doesn’t blame you, Landon…you know that, right?”
Landon sighed. “He never does. Even when it’s warranted.”
He fell quiet, his eyes never leaving the path Kingston had taken while his hold on me never loosened. I wanted to ease the pain between them, but I didn’t know how.
“We’re going to find a way out of this. I can share more with you tomorrow. Tonight, I?—”
“Quinn, you don’t have to explain. You need time with him. He…I know he needs that with you, too.”
“Yeah.” I peeked up at him. “But maybe tomorrow, we can all spend some time together?”
Landon leaned down and pressed a kiss against my lips, the corner of his mouth lifting at the hopeful expression on my face. “As you wish.”
When he pulled back, he straightened, and I turned to find Kingston walking up to meet us, the mask he’d removed earlier now back in place. Landon nodded at Kingston and gave me one last smile before releasing me. Kingston’s mask slipped as he nodded to Landon.
“I’ll take care of her for you tonight, mate.”
My heart clenched, thinking of the way Kingston had said that to Landon after our dance at the first party. At the time it had seemed like a reminder to Landon that Kingston was interested in me. It had sent me into a bit of a self-aware spiral, wondering if I’d be forced to choose.
But there was no possession, no claim in the way he said the words. It wasn’t what I thought, like so many things at Camelot Court. He said it because I mattered to both of them.
Like that was simply the way it was supposed to be, when they both couldn’t be with me.
Landon nodded and went inside. Kingston watched him go before turning back to me and holding out his hand. “Ready for one more peek behind the curtain?”
“Yes.” I gripped him tightly. “I’m with you.”
When we reached the bedrooms, I ducked into mine to grab my toiletries and—I’ll be honest—my cutest sleep shirt before I crossed the hall to Kingston’s open door.
When I knocked on the doorframe, he didn’t answer, but the sound of running water came from somewhere in the room. I knocked louder and cleared my throat.
My breath caught when he came to the door.
Shirtless, again.
“Uh…”
My words—my every coherent thought—evaporated like snowflakes on my tongue. After everything he’d shared today, I needed to lock it up. His mind had to be far from thoughts like that, but my breathless question gave away his effect on me.
“Permission to enter?”
Kingston took my hand off the doorframe and tugged me into the room. He pulled me into his arms, wrapping them around me. His lips curved as he kissed the top of my head.
“You have no idea what that look on your face does to me.”
“What look?”
“Like I’m more than my family, more than Camelot Court and my role here. A person separate from all of that.” Cradling my face in his hands, awe brightened his blue-gray eyes. “You look at me like I’m real .”
I hugged him tighter. “You are real. And so much more, Kingston. I don’t have all the answers yet, but I do know that.”
He nodded, his chin jostling the top of my head, and a sound coming from the back of his throat. I wasn’t sure if he wanted to speak, but he stayed silent.
We held each other there until finally, he pulled back.
“It was nice to see the two of them like that.”
I tilted my head. “What do you mean?”
“On the same side. Beside you.” The corner of his mouth lifted. “There’s been bad blood between us for so long, it’s hard for them to remember when it started. Which offense caused all the hate and distrust. Sometimes, it’s hard for them to see it wasn’t put there by our hands at all.”
He guided me to the bed, taking steps back until he sat on the edge. His legs opened to slide alongside mine, and I stepped easily into the space between them.
I brushed his hair back and away from his face. “But you remember?”
Kingston closed his eyes as my fingers ran through his soft curls, a murmured assent his only response.
“Can you tell me what happened?”
He nodded, swallowing deeply. “It ties into when all this started with my father. But it’s not—Quinn, there are some parts of my past that might be difficult for you to hear. Parts you might not want to know.”
Leaning forward, I pressed my lips against his. Quieting any more statements like that.
“I want to know you , Kingston. The good, the bad…the parts you think might turn me away. Your scars—they’re the pieces I want to know most of all. They’re safe with me.”
My three broody men connected in more ways than one. I’d needed my time with Landon and Max to get to this point.
To look Kingston in the eye and say, “And to prove it, you can see mine first.”
Slowly, I pulled the hem of my t-shirt over my head. I heaved a breath, and I took his hand.
His eyes were on my face, staring at me like he couldn’t believe I was real, and they never faltered. Even as I brought his hand up to the skin underneath my left breast.
“Last year, I almost lost my virginity. But my ex, he…The night we planned to spend together, I got cold feet and chickened out. At least, that was how I thought about it for a long time after. But the truth was that deep down, he never saw me. Not really. Not the way I’ve felt seen since coming here. ”
Kingston touched the small scar on my ribcage, still as red and angry as ever.
“He’d picked me up for our date, so when I changed my mind and wanted to go home, I had to call my dad to come get me. My ex had stormed out and left me at his place, and I just wanted to go home. And my dad…”
My throat tightened, but Kingston filled in the words I wanted to release.
“He showed up for you.”
I nodded, swallowing deeply. “He always did. He was?—”
Tears pricked my eyes as the memories resurfaced, and I fought hard to keep them at bay, wanting to share this.
“I could’ve just spent the night. Waited for my ex to come back or made him take me home the next morning, but I wanted to go home. I wanted to be where I felt safe and seen. So, I made the call.”
Kingston’s thumb pressed lightly against the scar, and he leaned forward to kiss the angry mark.
“The roads were wet, and a truck…It came out of nowhere, and it all happened so quickly. One second we were driving and singing along to the radio, and the next, the impact came. The car flipped. And I tried. I just—I couldn’t get out of my seat belt.
I tried so hard, but I couldn’t get free.
” My heart raced the way it always did when I thought of that night. “Kingston, I couldn’t get to him.”
His arms came around my waist, holding me tightly as tears slipped down my cheeks.
“I can still picture it. The moment he took his last breath. I still—I hear it sometimes. It was all I heard for the longest time after. And I almost…I didn’t think I deserved?—”
He lifted his head, blue-gray eyes meeting mine as I fought to release the truth.
“I just wanted it to be over. Because if I hadn’t called him, he’d still be here. And that scar”—I brought his hand up to my scalp—“and this one, have always been painful reminders of my biggest regret.”
My eyes burned as I ran his fingers along the ridge of my scar. It tingled the way it always did.
“I kept all the pain and guilt locked away inside me. But I would tug on my scar whenever it tried to come out. Whenever I struggled or things went wrong. Whenever it felt like I’d lost everything, I reminded myself why. Maybe…for the same reason you rubbed your wound.”
Kingston gripped my chin, locking our eyes as a tear slipped down my cheek. “You didn’t deserve to struggle for making that call, Quinn.”
“Then you didn’t deserve that , either.”
He held my gaze, his face a war of emotions as he took in my words. But he finally nodded and loosened his grip.
“The scars aren’t there to remind us we have nothing to live for, or that we don’t deserve to. For me, that was… grief . The darkest part of it, and I do feel like I’ve let that thought go. Maybe because now, my scars feel different. Like reminders of why I need to keep going. Keep fighting.”
He tilted his head in question.
“Because I survived. Good or bad, I got to keep my life while his was taken. Wrong or right—guilty or innocent—I’m the one still here. And I have to believe there’s a reason for that.”
He slid his hand into my hair, brushing my cheek.
“You, know, my dad—honestly, he would’ve loved you.
” I choked out a laugh, more sure of that than anything else.
“You, with all your secrets. And if he had seen what I’ve seen since I came here, he would’ve stayed, too.
He would’ve fought for you. So, if it wasn’t my time on that bridge, and if that night ultimately led me here, then… Maybe that’s why.”
“You think he would’ve tried to stop this, too?”
I nodded. “I do. Even if, like me, he would’ve been woefully out of his element, he would’ve used all his years hunting for secrets as a researcher to help in whatever way he could. I know that’s true.”
“But fate sent you instead.”
“Exactly. So, there will be more sass and curse words along the way. Sleep shirts, too, but…I’m fighting for this. Fighting for you . And those terrible parts of my past? The dark parts, I see them differently now.”
I glanced around his room, as if to encompass the entirety of Camelot Court.
“This place, even with its many, many flaws, is shedding light on the parts of myself I’ve struggled to face, and changing everything. Having someone—three someones—show me my pain could be beautiful…that has changed everything.”
He held my gaze, and I ran my fingers past his ears to take hold of his face.
“Let me do that for you, too. Let me in. Because your scars won’t turn me away from you.” My heart clenched as his eyes fell closed. “Everything that shaped you? It brought me here. It saved me. And the things that shaped me? They did the same by leading me here, so I can save you, too.”